


Paper Training

by CanuckleheadCowgirl, magnetocerebro



Series: The 714 Marvel Universe [8]
Category: Avengers (Comics), X-Men (Comicverse)
Genre: 714 Universe - Freeform, Gen, X-Men/Happiness, there's an X-wedding and we all know that is gonna be fun
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2017-07-07
Packaged: 2018-10-28 11:38:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 77,876
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10830507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CanuckleheadCowgirl/pseuds/CanuckleheadCowgirl, https://archiveofourown.org/users/magnetocerebro/pseuds/magnetocerebro
Summary: Volume Seven of the 714 universe - where our darling couples continue their adventures in love - and danger! We'll kick it off with a wedding and see what could POSSIBLY go wrong with something like that.





	1. Be My Baby

Noh and Jubilee had decided they wanted to be married the week after classes ended at the school, before anyone went on any trips to Japan or interplanetary expeditions, that sort of thing. So Kitty had come in from with Peter Quill at the end of the school year to help throw Jubilee a bachelorette party for the ages — complete with _plenty_ of sugary sweets, pajamas, and taking over Storm's office with the best pillow fort the mansion had ever seen.

The girls were pretty well relaxed, each of them sitting with their feet soaking after the pedicure scrubs, just chatting easily before the big day, discussing the details ahead of them, among other things.

"You know, I'm still convinced Noh doesn't understand the flowers," Kate said with an easy grin. "You should sock him with the ones you brought to Billy and Teddy's, America."

"If you think those are easy to find, you're crazy," America replied easily, without even opening her eyes as she had her head tipped all the way back. "They only bloom for about an hour, so you have to open the portals just right…. For the Demiurge? Sure, I'll do that trick. But I had to sleep it off for a week, couldn't open a thing for _seven days_ , Kate."

"Okay, my bad for asking," Kate said, waving her hand with a smirk. "They just smelled nice is all."

"Well, yeah, they smell different to everyone." America looked over at Jubilee. "What'd you smell? Bet it was something sugary sweet and Kree-flavored," she said with a troublemaking grin.

"That .. was perfectly personal," Jubilee replied. "So never you mind."

America just grinned wider. "C'mon, Glitter Queen. It's not like the whole world doesn't know about you and Marvel Boy."

"Why don't you tell me yours and then I'll tell you mine — since I'm SO predictable?" Jubilee challenged.

"Smells like a medicine cabinet," America said with a shrug.

"Druggie," Jubes said under her breath.

"Lucy keeps me in good supply," America laughed easily. "Must be why I keep going back for more dates."

"So you _are_ an addict," Jubilee said. She grinned widely at her. "When do we get to spend actual time with her? She's cute."

"Well, I _was_ going to bring her last night, but you know how it is. Dating an EMT." America sighed. "Sooner or later, I'll bring her around, but then she's going to meet Storm at a girls' night here, and then she'll probably dump me. Clearly, she's just using me to meet cool superheroes," she teased.

"Just tell her that Storm isn't around much anymore. Rekindling old flames," Jubilee said with a raised eyebrow. "Scandalous."

"Didn't she just fly in from that test flight with Forge, like, this morning?" Kate asked, shaking her head. "Brave woman."

"And back out again this afternoon," Kitty told her. "The Maker is on a roll."

"I've mentioned how cute it is that she calls him that, right? Because it's really cute," Kate said, giggling slightly.

"And he calls her 'his Goddess'," Kitty told her. "They're disgusting."

"Fit right in around here, actually," America told Kitty with a little grin. "You should _see_ Kate and Kurt. It's just nonstop."

"Still?" Kitty said, turning toward Kate. "Honeymoon phase is supposed to be … you know. _After_ the honeymoon."

"Guess we couldn't wait," Kate said with a grin and a shrug.

Kitty leaned forward with a raised eyebrow and leveled her finger at Kate. "As long as you intend to _follow through_ and not make my Elf a broken little Elf."

"Hey, I have _zero_ plans to break the cutest X-Man in existence," Kate said, holding up her hands.

"Excuse _you_ ," Jubilee said. " _I_ am the cutest X-Man in existence — on any plane, thankyouverymuch."

"She's got you there, Princess," America laughed.

Kate shrugged and laughed. "Well, I _am_ biased."

"A cop out way of admitting that you know you're wrong," Jubilee said with an airy tone.

"Oh, I'm never wrong. I just can see where you'd think my bias would blind me to the truth," Kate laughed. "It was an olive branch, Jubes. Take it and just pretend you don't know you're second fiddle to the blue Elf."

"You are not only wrong, but you're so _hateful_ ," Jubilee laughed before she looked around the room. "I think I need back up."

"Need someone to pin her down so you can tickle her? Usually works for me if she annoys me," America offered.

"I'll give you a kiss if you just do it for me?"

"Ooh, Lucy might come after you," America teased. "You're pretty cute, you know. Cutest X-Man and all. She could get jealous."

"I'll kiss her too," Jubilee laughed.

"Then you got it, Glitter Queen," America said a split second before she jumped at Kate, pulling her out of the foot soak and pinning her down to tickle her _mercilessly_ , until Kate was gasping for breath, tears in her eyes, and America finally let her get her breath back — though she was still totally pinned.

"You know," Paige said quietly. "You could have just asked Kurt for the tie breaker."

"This is so much more fun, though," America said, grinning. "Besides, he would've said Kate, and then we'd have three contenders."

"No, he would have said Jubilee," Kitty said. "She's getting married, and he's doing the ceremony. She is the cutest right now."

"Right _now_ ," Kate gasped out from underneath America, though that just had the bushy-headed former Young Avenger back to mercilessly tickling her best friend.

Just to be a pain, Kitty pulled out her cell phone and made a quick call to Kurt to ask him, and a few moments later, after a few giggles from Kitty, she hung up to say "Jubilee is cutest; he's the most debonair."

"Okay, the debonair thing is true," Kate said as America finally let her up and she wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes. "Gotta love the dapper Elf."

After Jubilee gladly paid up with America — complete with a deep dip and a ton of giggles all around — the conversation twisted from cutest X-Man back to plans for the wedding. And, inevitably, the ever-romantic Miss Guthrie had to ask what was on several minds.

"So, who's next anyhow? You and Kurt have been together for quite a while now, haven't you?" Paige asked with a friendly smile Kate's way.

"Almost two years, yeah," Kate said carefully.

"Well that's great!" Paige said with a broad grin. "You two really do make a cute couple; I've seen the pictures."

"I'm pretty partial to him," Kate agreed, grinning to match Paige, though her body language was still a little guarded. "He's kind of adorable."

"He does have a way about him," Paige said. "So when is your date? Two years is pretty serious. Particularly with an X-Man."

"We don't have a date," Kate said, shaking her head and looking like she wanted _out_ of the conversation.

"Well, it's not that big of a deal really; one of my brothers just threw a dart at the calendar and went with it. He's been married for six years now — sweetest little hayseeds you ever saw," Paige said with a laugh. "You thinking about maybe a fall wedding or waiting until next spring?"

"Um." Kate pushed back her hair even though it hadn't really fallen out of place.

"I guess it really doesn't matter, does it?" Paige said with a wave. "He's probably going to say it needs to be in a church anyhow. Those pretty Catholic weddings with the incense and the colored windows — it'll be gorgeous, I'm sure, no matter what time of year it is."

"Yeah, the cathedrals are gorgeous around Easter and Christmas," Kate said, trying to change the subject. "I mean, the Easter Mass wasn't as amazing as the midnight Christmas one, but that was a whole other—"

"Oh! A cathedral! That — that would be great! A big long train... and if you _did_ do it by Easter, there's all those purple things all over the place."

"I did notice that," Kate said with a smile. "The purple's nice." She took a deep breath and decided the only way off this train was to stop it dead. "But you know — we're not engaged or anything. He's just…. We're just dating."

"What?" Paige said, wide-eyed and completely deflated. "I thought — I thought you were serious about him."

Kate looked around the room for a moment and just shrugged quietly as she found herself facing down several expectant looks. "I am," she half-mumbled.

"Are you seriously going to try to just Hawkeye your way outta that?" Jubilee teased.

Kate shook her head and held up her hands. "Hey. I'm not Clint. I'm not — that's not... "

"Well that was a great impression of him."

"Come _on_ , Jubes," Kate said, looking pleadingly at her friend.

But Jubilee wasn't any help as she just leaned forward. "Hey. Listen. Noh and I are going first — just to prove it's not fatal, okay?"

"And we're all very happy for you. Seriously. He's _obnoxiously_ excited to throw the 'lace' at the guys. It's endearing," Kate said with a little smirk.

"And think of how adorable it would be if it was Kurt," Jubilee pointed out. When Kate's smirk disappeared, she added, "I'm not saying you have to do it as quick as Paige is pushing for — but come _on._ He'd be so much cuter as a groom than he is even now as the minister."

"He _loves_ being the minister," Kate said, getting some of her smile back and trying, once again, to get the conversation _off_ of her. "He gets this look on his face and just… it's the most adorable thing I've ever seen. Like he's going to _burst_."

"Can you imagine the stroke he's going to have if Logan ever gets that far?" Kitty asked, trying to help Kate avoid a stroke of her own — for the moment. "He won't know what to do — pick a role. best man or minister. He'd freak out."

"He'd try to do them both at the same time," Kate laughed. "Can you imagine? 'Porting between the different roles."

"Yeah, he's going to have trouble picking," Kitty agreed with a laugh of her own. "And you know Logan would leave the choice to him. Just to watch him twitch."

"So mean," Kate giggled. "We should really start prepping Kurt for this life-altering decision. I mean, Logan and K have been together for a while now, too."

"Not nearly as long as you and Kurt," Jubilee pointed out, not about to be deterred from her self-appointed mission. "And she's on the edge of disappearing at the drop of a hat."

"Well, it's not a race," Kate pointed out. "There's no rule that says you have to get married after you reach a certain point."

"That's true," Jubilee agreed. "But still."

"Well to hear Noh say it, you're supposed to get married after the 'I love you's," America said with a smirk Kate's way. "Which was, what, well before the year mark for you two, wasn't it?"

"Noh is still convinced that the rice-throwing is meant as a plague on your house," Kate teased.

"Noh asked Wolverine and Cyclops into the war room to ask permission. Alone," Jubilee said.

"I know. You should have seen the look on Scott's face right after he came out of the room. He was _dying_. I thought his face was going to crack from all that grinning," Kate laughed.

"I'm just saying, he's got you beat in the _guts_ department," Jubilee mumbled shrugging and doing her level best to be as obnoxious as possible.

"Kate, I think she just called you a Chicken Hawk," America said with a troublemaking grin that got an almost immediate response from a very betrayed-looking Kate.

"Do you have that cued up? It makes me happy," Jubilee laughed, her hands clasped as she grinned at America.

America tossed Jubilee her phone. "It's got its own icon. David programmed it for me. It's the purple chicken."

Kate threw back her head and groaned dramatically. "When are you guys gonna let that _go_?"

"Oh, well. Article 206 of the X-Men Handbook. When you joined the team, you missed the fine print," Kitty said. "Any nickname given to you by Logan will stick indefinitely. I'm sorry. It's the law."

"Well then. Jubes, I hope you're happy with Bug Boy," Kate said with a smirk.

"He calls him a cockroach when he's irritated," Jubilee said with a shrug. "Doesn't bug me at all."

America winced theatrically. "Ooh. Really? Puns?"

"Guess I've been living with the Chicken Hawk for too long," Jubilee said.

"I'm not the punny Hawkeye," Kate said with a wave. "You're confused. Must be pre-wedding jitters."

"Nope, it was that _great_ Clint impression you did earlier. _So_ authentic."

Kate glared at her for a moment. "You're lucky you're getting married tomorrow."

"I really am," Jubilee agreed. "You'll see yourself one day."

"You two honeymooning on the moon with the sparkling flowers?" America asked with a lazy grin as Kate just covered her face with both hands. "Or are you thinking somewhere more Terran?"

"I have no idea," Jubilee replied. "He said he had an idea, so I'm rollin' with it. Whatever it is."

"Careful, or you'll just end up at Dazzler concerts," Kate teased. "He's a _big_ fan."

"She's nice," Jubilee said. "Little flaky? But she's alright."

"Good. I hope you three are happy together," Kate said, smirking wider.

"I'm sure they will be," America said. She leaned back and grinned at the other girls as she _finally_ decided to help Kate out and got to her feet. "Come on. I think there's still some Twizzlers we haven't finished off."

* * *

The next day, the girls were all getting ready for the big day — tucked away in a little house off the beach for the finishing touches. Jubilee had made good on her promise to put Kate in hot pink, as well as America — just to tweak her. But Kitty and Paige looked stunning in the light yellow dresses as they did each other's hair in up-do's. They were going barefoot, with skirts down to their knees, and already, they were planning some pictures standing in the waves — since Peter Parker, wedding photographer extraordinaire, was determined to get some good beach shots.

Jubilee had also gone for a short look, a sassy little dress with pearls at the sashes around her waist and sparkles in the half-veil that looked almost like sea foam. She was bouncing around excitedly, also barefoot, as the girls checked each other's makeup one last time.

The guys were already waiting on the beach when they came out, all of the guys in the Young Avengers squad looking dapper in their white ties and coat tails — though none of them were grinning quite like Noh, who was in all white and looked like he might start doing cartwheels.

As the girls took their places, Kate snuck a glance at Kurt, whose grin was second only to Noh. He was humming old German tunes to himself as he readjusted his collar and straightened his jacket, and one of the bamfs was very carefully fluffing his curls. All of the little imps had white ties and were taking the whole thing very seriously. There was even another such prepper for Noh — his usual tiny demon friend, who was determined that not a speck of sand would get on his white suit until Jubilee got there — a losing battle, no matter how valiant he was about it, especially since he was tracking sand where he perched on Noh's shoulder.

They were just waiting until the first edges of color hit the sky so they could get the perfect sunset wedding on the beach as the assembled Young Avengers, X-Men, and various other friends and heroes were out in force to celebrate. Once the first orange streaks lit up the sky, the music started up for Jubilee's entrance — and all eyes were on the positively beaming firecracker, walking arm-in-arm with Logan.

Kate wasn't sure what was making her grin more — the look on Logan's face, with the wide smile, puffed chest, and the way he had his hand covering Jubilee's on his arm; or the fact that Noh's lips had parted and he was just openly _staring_ at Jubilee. It was a pretty close tossup.

When Logan got Jubilee down the aisle, Jubilee pressed a quick kiss to his cheek before he could hand her off, and then she turned to Noh to reach up and close his mouth with a finger under his chin.

Kurt looked just about ready to burst as he grinned at the two of them and addressed the group at large: "Dearly beloved," he said, the smile somehow getting wider even though that didn't seem to be physically possible. "We're gathered here to witness the union of two of the sweetest people I know. They deserve the most happiness this life can give them." He took a breath and looked out over the group before he looked to Noh for the vows, who took a moment to compose himself and grin broadly.

"My Jubilee," he said with such fondness in his voice that those in attendance could have sworn his voice cracked. "I should not be this happy. My home was one of transcendental peace and harmony, and I was _content_ , but this deep… this bone-deep emotion — I've never known anything like it." He cracked the slightest of smirks for a moment before he added, "And you know I will adore you 'til eternity."

Those that knew Noh best had to smirk at the inclusion of the Ronette lyrics, but they were even more surprised when Jubilee cleared her throat, took a deep breath and broke into singing his favorite song to him — complete with the wha-ohs. Noh's smile had turned back into an open-mouthed stare as soon as she started in on the lyrics, and by the time she got to "For every kiss you give me, I'll give you three," those that were closest could see him holding back tears, looking surprised at himself.

Kurt looked like he was _floating_ he was grinning so wide as he looked between the two of them, waiting just a moment for Noh to compose himself before he said, "If there is anyone here who objects to this wedding, speak now or forever hold your peace." When there was silence apart from a couple bamf growling threateningly like they might attack anyone who _did_ speak up, taking their roles as possible trouble prevention _very, very_ seriously, Kurt just nodded at the two of them.

"Then do you, Noh-Varr, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, to love, honor and cherish, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto her for as long as you both shall live?"

"Yes — I do," Noh said quickly, the bright smile returning.

"And do you, Jubilation Lee, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, to love, honor and cherish, in good times and woe, for richer or poorer, keeping yourself solely unto him for as long as you both shall live?"

Jubilee had waited long enough for Kurt to finish before she bounced on her toes. "I do!"

"Then I pronounce you man and wife — you may—"

Jubilee didn't wait long enough for Kurt to finish before she grabbed Noh by his lapels and kissed him there for everyone to see, and the group burst into applause — and a few celebratory kisses of their own.

Noh had swept Jubilee up in the moment, and in a few long strides, he took them both out into the waves, standing with her in his arms in the middle of the water that came up to his knees as the sea lapped around them before he set her down in the water so that they could share a kiss in the waves.

The sun had set by then, the faintest hues of pink just on the horizon, as the group gathered under the sparkle lights to celebrate and chat. Kitty and Teddy gave the most hilarious (and touching) maid of honor and best man speeches, complete with stories of how they met the two — which had half the audience chuckling as Teddy recounted how Noh was trying to straight up murder him. "Fun times," he said.

No one was surprised when Noh and Jubilee had their first dance under the twinkle lights to "Be My Baby" — it seemed to be a theme that day. But there were a few people — those who didn't _know_ Logan couldn't say no to his Jubes — that looked surprised when she pulled him out to dance with her to "Moonlight Serenade." When the song was over, she flung her arms around his neck, and he pressed a kiss to her temple before he gently put her hands back in Noh's as the dancing continued and more people joined in.

Eventually, Jubilee and Noh had to stop dancing to do a few other wedding traditions, including cutting the cake, which Noh seemed to be doing very precisely, cutting a piece to place on a plate and put a bit on a fork to feed Jubilee, who giggled, took the bite, and then picked up the entire piece and just smashed it into his face as he looked completely flabbergasted. She broke into a delighted laugh and flung her arms around his neck to start kissing him so she, too, could be covered in cake.

After the two of them managed to wipe the cake off and everyone had a bit of dessert, Jubilee was adamant about lining up the girls for the bouquet toss — and though Kate noticed that K was conspicuously gone to the beach house to "use the bathroom" at that exact moment, Jubilee didn't seem to care so much as she insisted everyone line up and grinned _widely_ at Kate. She took a few steps and looked over her shoulder to toss it …. before she just laughed, shook her head, and took several running steps to shove the whole bouquet right into Kate's hands. "Congratulations! You caught it!"

Kate tried very hard to give the bouquet back as their friends laughed in the background. "That's not — you have to _throw_ it," she tried to say, but Jubilee put her nose in the air, shook her head airily, and skipped over to grab Noh by the now-untied bow tie and pull him over for the garter toss.

Noh didn't go off-script from what he had studied in this custom, doing the garter toss exactly like he'd seen Scott do it, holding the delicate lace above his head to snap it like a rubber band and then spinning in place to quickly see who it was. And although it was clear Noh wasn't aiming for anyone in particular, the bamfs took one quick look at each other before they seized Kurt's arms and legs and teleported him directly into the path of the garter so that it hit him in the chest.

Noh grinned widely at Kurt. "In this case, I hope the superstitions are true," he said with a smile as Jubilee burst into giggles.

A very red-faced Kate stuck her tongue out at Jubilee and couldn't quite look at Kurt, so she looked around for a friendly face — and saw K at the bar with Logan. Setting the bouquet down on the nearest table, she all but sped over to where they were. "Way to leave me hanging," she said, shaking her head as she hit her friend in the arm. "You should've taken me _with_ you to hide."

"I don't know what you're talking about," K said with a little wrinkled up nose. "I've been right here the whole time with him." She tipped her head Logan's way. "Nice catch, by the way."

"I didn't _catch_ anything," Kate grumbled.

"Oh. You caught _something_ alright."

Kate gave K a _look_ and got herself some champagne, leaning against the bar. "Traitor."

"Listen, if you're with the kids over there — you get tied up in their little games. Little tip: you don't _have_ to participate," K told her. "Logan wasn't over in that pile of desperation either."

"Yeah. Good advice for next time," Kate said with a small smirk, shaking her head. "Good thing no one's up on the docket for a while — unless you think America is _that_ fast of a mover," she added with a smirk.

"I really don't know her well enough, but I wouldn't be surprised."

"K, it took her, like, a year before they'd gone on enough dates to be considered 'dating.' We're safe from flower assaults for a while, I promise." Kate smirked and took a sip of champagne, gesturing at the party. "You know. Theoretically. I wouldn't put it past the bamfs to just start showing up with flowers. Little demons."

"Yeah. Then I guess we're out of the danger zone for the time being."

Kate toasted her with her glass. "Seems like it."

As the girls took a drink, Logan shook his head and watched the show as the dancing started up again, and, after a few songs, Kurt teleported over with a smile.

"Hey, handsome," Kate said with a soft smile. "How's my favorite wedding officiant?"

"After trying to explain to the bamfs that they cheated? Still wonderful," he said with a grin.

"They _are_ little demons," Kate pointed out. " _Jubes,_ on the other hand, doesn't have that excuse."

"You don't know her too well then," Logan said before he pushed off from the bar and gave K a quick kiss before he walked off. "I owe Storm a dance. Have fun, troublemakers."

"That sounds like a wonderful idea," Kurt said as he grinned at the two girls leaning on the bar. "May I?" he asked as he put his hand out to K. The smile slipped a bit as she looked up at him and then to Kate, who just shrugged.

"Alright then, sure," K replied cautiously as Kurt grinned a bit wider. As soon as she took his hand, they disappeared and reappeared on the far end of the dance floor — with K cursing slightly as she clutched onto a laughing Kurt.

Kate smirked to herself as she sipped her champagne and watched the various sets of dancers on the floor, pleased for a moment that she seemed to have dodged the overly happy wedding Elf while she was still recovering from the flower assault. She'd turned to pick up a fresh glass of champagne when Kitty seemed to materialize next to her.

"What are we watching?" Kitty asked.

Kate waved her hand in Kurt's direction. "He's kidnapped K," she explained with a soft smile. "I can't decide whose expression is better."

"You mean between the dizzy coughing and the grinning imp? Tough call when she abandoned you, I suppose," Kitty said as she picked up her own glass of champagne.

"Backstabber," Kate agreed with a little smirk.

"So what happened? Do you two have some kind of a pact or something?" Kitty asked.

"Nothing that official," Kate laughed, shaking her head. "Just ... she gets it."

"Really? You're saying it's just coincidence that both of you are just _toying_ with two of my favorite people in the world?"

Kate looked surprised at the change in Kitty's tone and turned to face her better. "That's not—"

"Both of them. Both of you. I'm not amused," Kitty said, her arms crossed over her chest and feet planted firmly.

Kate shook her head quickly. "It's not ... we're not playing games, I swear," she tried to explain.

"That is not how it _looks_ ," Kitty told her. "I'll leave plenty of energy for ripping on her for when I can corner her — but _you_? Come on, Kate. He's completely smitten with you, and you're rubbing it in his face."

"No, I'm not!" Kate said, shaking her head, looking almost pleading. "He's — I love him to pieces, Kitty."

"Then maybe you better either re-evaluate what you consider love, or pony up and do something to prove it." Kitty looked overly serious as she glared her way. "I'm not saying you have to get married right away like these guys did. I'm really not. But you better make sure he knows that he doesn't have to give up what he wants out of life either."

"Kitty," Kate said, trying to reason with her. "He… he knows. He has to know."

"He's not a telepath, and hey. He's a guy. You know how to deal with men? You have to use small words they can process and speak slowly. And repeat yourself. A lot. Are you doing that, or just hoping he knows that you 'love' him?"

"I tell him all the time," Kate said.

"And you also make it very clear that you have no interest in making an actual commitment to him too," Kitty said. "Not like you're the first to do that to him, though."

Kate was simply floored, staring at Kitty openly. "I'd never… I wouldn't….!"

"Wouldn't what?" Kitty asked, eyes narrowed even further as she leaned forward.

It took Kate a long moment to shake her head and try again. "Leave him. I'd never do that. I'd never hurt him, Kitty, _please_."

"Maybe, maybe not," Kitty replied. "But if you think that just stringing him along won't hurt him? You're wrong. And he would do _anything_ for you." She just glared at Kate for a good long moment, even as the song ended, and she didn't drop her focus off of Kate until Logan stepped up between the two of them to grab a drink.

"You girls playing nice?" Logan asked as he leaned against the bar between them, pushing them both to the side to separate them better, watching both of them.

"Just having a little chat, right, Kate?" Kitty said.

Kate blinked a few times and just nodded. "Mmhmm."

Logan didn't look convinced as he let out a sigh and turned to Kitty for a moment, then back to Kate. "What are you drinkin' tonight, darlin'?"

"Oh… I think just water from here on," Kate said quietly.

"Whiskey it is, then?" he teased her.

She had to smirk the slightest bit. "Yeah. That."

He gave the bartender a nod and a moment later put a shot glass in her hand as Kurt and K returned, both of them laughing quietly, as K held on tightly to him still. "He's vicious, Kate," K said as Kurt handed her off to Logan.

"Lies," Kate said with a soft smirk. "He's dashing."

"Terribly, cripplingly dashing, yes," K agreed as Kitty clearly fixed her sights on her.

"Glad to hear you had fun," Logan said as he set his now empty shot glass down. "But it's my turn now, kids." With that, he pulled K back out onto the dancefloor as Kitty half glared after them.

"I think he has the right idea," Kurt said as he offered Kate his hand. "What do you say, _V_ _ö_ _gelchen_?"

"Oh, yes, please," Kate said quickly, taking his hand and pulling herself closer to him, just barely managing not to look over her shoulder at Kitty — and in an instant, they had teleported off to the dance floor.

They had been gently spinning to the music for a while before Kurt had glanced over to his friend and tipped his head Logan's way. "I think she's starting to relax a little," he told her.

"Well, she didn't run off when she found out he was Canadian," Kate said, latching onto the subject.

"A delicate time for any girl," Kurt said with a laugh.

"Those Canadians are scary," Kate smirked. "So apologetic and syrupy."

"Well, when you think of the Canadians we know — I can see her point," Kurt said. "Logan and — you haven't met anyone from Alpha Flight yet, have you? They're something else — then of course, Wade."

"Ah, well, Wade." Kate shook her head. "I think she's finally _starting_ to ease up on Clint for that one."

"From what I heard from Logan, I wouldn't bet on that," Kurt said.

"She knows it wasn't Clint's idea, right?" Kate asked with an arched eyebrow. "I mean, I feel like I gotta defend my fellow Hawkeye."

"I believe the term she used was 'accomplice'."

"Poor Clint," Kate said, shaking her head.

"Don't feel bad for him," Kurt said. "She won't hurt him. Not permanently. But Wade …. may not like her very much the next time they cross paths. Logan has agreed to let her handle it alone."

Kate winced theatrically. "Ouch."

"You know, she doesn't seem to be kidding about the Viking thing. Family stories and whatnot. She made Logan cringe describing something she wanted to do to someone ..."

"That's one story I'm _definitely_ okay never ever hearing," Kate said, shaking her head in disbelief.

Kurt just laughed and pulled her closer to kiss her temple. "Are you enjoying yourself tonight?"

"I am right now," Kate said with a little smile as she returned the kiss. "But that might just be because of how much I love you."

"And I you," he replied. "It was beautiful tonight — and Jubilee ... I don't think anyone was expecting her to do what she did."

"What, marry a Kree? Well, I guess she's full of surprises," Kate said, waving her hand.

He chuckled. "The song. It was adorable. I don't think I've ever had anyone sing their dedication."

"I thought Noh was going to just _die._ It was amazing," Kate agreed with a wide smile.

"Full of surprises, our firecracker," Kurt laughed.

"And you loved every second of it," Kate said.

"I did," Kurt admitted. "They are always so unique. No two are alike."

She smiled at him and stopped spinning to pull him into a kiss. When the kiss broke, she put her head on his chest and held him tight. "Love you, Elf," she said quietly.

He let out a quiet chuckle as he returned the squeeze. "I love you too, _liebling_."


	2. Intergalactic Lawyer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noh-Varr and Jubilee's wedding is RUDELY interrupted by some intergalactic invaders bent on serving justice. But Noh has his lawyer on retainer. Come for the cocktails, stay for the trial of Noh-Varr!

As the night wore on, there were fewer and fewer people out dancing under the stars — especially since so many of the guests were heroes and had obligations to fulfil. David had just announced that this would be the last song before they sent off the newlyweds when the wedding was crashed by several well-armored and completely uninvited guests.

Anyone at the wedding who'd had dealings with the Kree recognized the armor of the Accuser Corp as the Kree forces glanced around the wedding and fixed their sights on the newlyweds. It had happened quickly enough that most of the guests were thrown off their guard, but it only took a second for everyone to get their feet back underneath them — and to get mad when a few of the Accusers outright grabbed both Noh and Jubilee to pull them apart from their dance.

As soon as Jubilee was grabbed, Logan darted forward with claws at the ready. "Let her go," he shouted at the Accuser pulling her back by the arms, and the Kree soldier turned to engage him.

It was a short battle, especially for how mad Logan was, and it was no time before he'd gotten his claws through the armor protecting the Accuser with a deep growl.

But that was as far as he got. As soon as the Accuser hit the dirt, Logan was immobilized in a stasis field — and nearby, Noh was frozen was well, caught with one arm pulled back for a strike and all five claws in sharp points for a slice that he'd never get to complete.

It had happened quickly enough that none of the others were close enough to react, and already, the Accusers were moving to take Noh into custody.

"Let him go!" K snarled out as she stalked forward. "Both of 'em!"

"Silence, Terran — this is none of your concern. Do not interfere with the carriage of Kree justice," sneered the blue-skinned Kree standing between Noh and Jubilee with a sneer. Those that had dealings with the Kree in the past recognized him as Ronan the Accuser. "All crimes against the Empire must be atoned, and unless you too wish to stand accused, you will _stand down_."

Every one of the remaining wedding guests seemed to shout at once, though K was closest and clearest for Ronan to hear: "What crimes? That kid is nothing but wonderful."

Ronan turned to K with a sneer. "Your associate is a traitor and a thief, and he will be brought to justice for his actions. But if he has deluded you into thinking otherwise, don't feel too bad — Kree are far more advanced than you."

"Maybe not as advanced as you think if you find it acceptable to wreck a wedding," K growled. "Barbaric, knuckle dragging behavior for such an _advanced_ race."

For just a moment, an odd expression flicked over Ronan's face. "If not for other concerns on Hala, we would have arrived before," he said simply, waving his hands. "Enjoy the celebrations. We'll take our leave now."

"Hard to do without the _groom_."

"Let him _go_!" Kate shouted when it was clear that Ronan wasn't listening to K anymore, but to similar results.

Trying to help, Noh's little bamf friend teleported over in an instant to try to help his friend, but he couldn't reach Noh through the stasis field, and one of the Accusers booted him away as his fellow little demons growled in chorus.

But Ronan had simply turned from the group, and in an instant, he, the Accusers, and Noh had disappeared. The moment they teleported away, the stasis field around Logan lifted as well — and the whole thing happened in a matter of seconds.

"Where the hell did they go?" K demanded, whirling around to face the rest of the group. Every single wedding guest looked ready to kill someone — especially Logan, though he currently had his hands full with Jubilee as she was somehow fuming and falling apart at the same time, sparks flying from her fingertips as he held her tight. "I want to kill that son of a bitch right now."

"They probably took him back to Hala, the Kree home world," Scott said with a deep glare. "We can make good time if we hurry — Wiccan, do you think you can give us a boost again?"

"Why not America?" K said as she turned to Scott. "Can't she do something to help on this one? Because good time ain't gonna cut it."

Scott looked America's way, and she rolled up her sleeves with a nod. "We'd have to go through a few dimensional backdoors. Hala's pretty well insulated," she said. "Recently, anyway. They got the Supremer back up and running, and that thing hates ... well. My kind of infiltration."

"But you can do it?" Scott asked, both eyebrows raised.

"Not usually, but I can make it work for something like this," she said, her eyes narrowed. "We just have to stop through a couple dimensions that want to kill us. Nobody minds that, right?" America asked the group at large.

"Not even a little bit," Logan growled out as he stood next to K, still holding onto Jubilee.

America just nodded and raised both hands as her eyes started to glow and a huge, white star appeared in front of her. She kicked through it, and the whole thing shattered to reveal a darkened wasteland on the other side. "Everybody in," she called out. "I can only hold it open for so long."

The wedding guests wasted no time in diving through the newly opened portal before America started to take them through several dimensions that looked like they'd been decimated until she got around back to their own. "It's not an exact science," she told K over the rush of wind in a particularly dismal dimension where every step sounded like bones under their feet. "But I'm gonna try to put us right in the capitol city."

"I trust you," K assured her with Logan nodding along side her, and Jubilee trying to pull herself together.

America nodded and pulled up one last star, her brow scrunched in concentration before she shattered it with a kick and led the way through as the group of still barefooted wedding guests tumbled into the streets of Hala. Kitty immediately grabbed several of the group and pulled them through the buildings so that they were in the shadows, while Kurt and the bamfs took hold of everyone else to get them hidden in the shadows as well.

"If I wasn't so pissed off I'd kiss you," K told her, flashing her canines at America as the bushy-haired girl put both hands on her knees, bent over and clearly worn out from the effort.

Still, when she heard it, America grinned up at K. "Maybe when we get back."

"You're on," K promised. "You have so earned it."

America chuckled just the slightest as Logan offered her a hand and smirked her way. "Careful what you wish for," he advised before the group started to move through the city streets.

The scene was desolate, particularly for Hala, but the group somehow managed to keep out of sight as they moved. Scott was next to the ferals, leading the pack, and after he saw the way K's head snapped toward the first bit of local movement, he realized he needed to set some ground rules. "No biting anyone," Scott told K under his breath, though she waved him off.

"Where the hell are we going anyhow — or are we just destroying the city?" K asked looking at the tall alien architecture surrounding them.

"It's probably best if we don't start a war with the Kree," Scott pointed out. "But if they're putting him on trial, it'll be in the capitol — we've been there before."

She turned to look at him expectantly and just stared at him, and he nodded her way and led the way down the streets, looking over his shoulder for a moment as he told her. "Might be a bit slower than you're used to. The atmosphere here has much less oxygen than on Earth, so you might get tired faster."

"Noted," K replied. "Don't waste a single movement."

"Not what he means," Rachel said to her. _And you know it_ , she projected.

"Don't start until _after_ we get Noh back, maybe," Kate said, bumping her friend's shoulder.

The streets were a bit less pristine than the X-Men had seen them, with the evidence of some fights and battle scars still obvious as the wedding guests made their way through toward the center of the capitol city. But it was also obvious that this had to be where Noh had come from, as the whites and deep blues matched his ship, and the buildings and technology they passed had the same light hum.

Kitty winced one eye shut at some of the damage around them as she looked around. The battle with J'son had very nearly taken out the entire planet — and it was a miracle it was still standing. It had been a couple years, but it still looked like they were rebuilding.

They could see the spires of the capitol building when a Kree in familiar Accuser armor approached them, weapon resting at his side. "You were not invited to this trial," he said simply and dismissively.

But there was no way the group of them were going to be turned back after coming this far. "Like hell we weren't," America muttered under her breath.

"Noh-Varr is part of our _family_ ," Kurt said firmly.

The accuser tipped his head at Kurt for a moment, and when it was clear that Kurt was entirely serious, he shrugged. "As you wish. As the adoptive family, you are allowed to be present for the trial, if you insist on inviting yourselves."

Logan put a hand on K's arm to pull her back before she started something and Scott took a step halfway in front of her. "Lead the way, please," Scott said as Logan muttered quietly in K's ear what he wanted her to know.

K glanced over to Jubilee, who looked just _destroyed,_ before she stepped around Logan to the little bride and gave her a squeeze, keeping one arm around the girl's shoulders. "It's going to be okay. One way or another," K told her very quietly while Kate just shook her head at her.

 _Don't make promises you can't keep,_ Rachel projected to K, and K just glared back at the redhead for a moment.

 _With everyone here, there is no reason not to keep that promise,_ K projected back.

The Accuser nodded again at the group and simply turned on his heel to lead them through the streets and into a large building, circular and white, domed with energy. In the center was Ronan the Accuser, standing on a platform that hovered in midair as several Accusers allowed them seats in what was worryingly reminiscent of a colosseum. They weren't the only ones — Kree trials were public — but they were the only ones with Accusers sitting in their ranks to keep an eye on them.

When Noh finally made his appearance, on a similar platform to the one Ronan was on, Jubilee let out a soft gasp, sparks flying from her hands that were clenched in fists. Her brand new husband was just ... standing there, his hands bound in energy shackles in front of him and not offering a word of resistance as the platform stopped in the air below Ronan. He looked like he was steeling himself — right up until he saw the group of X-Men and other heroes that had come through with America. He stared at them in obvious surprise, clearly not expecting them to have been able to get there so quickly.

"Noh-Varr, you stand accused of high treason against the Kree Empire," Ronan said with an imperious glare. "In addition to defying the Supremor, you stand accused of the theft of weapons meant to be used in the defense of the Empire, as well as the destruction of an entire division of research. How plead you?"

Noh looked toward Jubilee for just a moment before he let out a breath and finally turned to face Ronan. "I can only plead guilty," he said, steadfastly not looking at a suddenly angrier Jubilee.

"Meant to be? Isn't that a basic cadet error in time travel?" K blurted out. "You can't charge him for a would have — or didn't you get that in your _basic_ training?"

"The use of the weapons is not in question here, just their theft," Ronan said with a glare. "And you are not his counsel. Be _silent._ "

"Maybe I should be his counsel, since he's clearly too stupid to defend himself," K replied and both Logan and Scott moved toward her, only for her to shove them both back.

Ronan considered it for a moment and then looked to Noh. "And would you allow this lowly Terran to defend you?" he asked with a sneer.

Noh looked toward K with wide eyes. "She knows nothing of my actions."

"That only makes me unbiased and more open to only the _facts_ ," K snarled toward Noh then turned her glare to Ronan. "I'm not burdened by your ridiculous overly emotional reaction over what _could have been_."

Ronan's eyes flashed for a moment before he simply nodded. "I'll allow it. Let the record show that the Kree do not allow even traitors to go undefended."

Noh was glaring hard at K even as one of the Accusers set her up with a platform she could stand on. "I need no counsel. I am capable of standing for myself."

"You know I can smell a lie, right?" K shot at him. "And fear."

"I'm not lying," Noh said, glaring harder before he turned to Ronan. "And I make no apologies for what I have done. The Phoenix force is not to be trifled with and has the capacity to destroy this world and many others. If I'm guilty for removing it from your reach, so be it, but I am _not wrong_."

K flat-out ignored Noh as she turned to Ronan. "I'd like to read the charges for myself. Obviously, he's spent too much time on Earth. Emotional. You know how that is when they're scared."

Ronan frowned at her. "You have heard the charges read, and he admits to each of them."

"I would like to see the account of what happened. He's an idiot, and he's just being emotional." She gestured toward Jubilee, who was sitting between Logan and Hank and looking nearly murderous. "He doesn't want to let his new wife know the extent of his crimes. And I would like to know all the details, since I didn't have the luxury of being fully informed."

Ronan leaned back for a moment. "You move to postpone the inevitable," he said, then paused, tipped his head to the side, and finally added, "but I will allow it. Consider it a wedding present, and my apology to the widow."

K just gave him a smirk as she turned his way. "Thank you for understanding."

Ronan glared at her, but the energy dome over their heads flickered for a moment before, for everyone to see — the records of Noh's time in Hala played. Everything from his defiance of the Supreme Intelligence to the tests of the Phoenix-like weaponry that he stole to his eventual escape from Hala with said weaponry, all there for those in attendance to see. It was clear that the Kree watchers only took the whole thing as evidence of Noh's guilt — and that certainly seemed to be the case with Noh himself, who just watched the whole thing with his jaw locked, looking furious and upset.

When it stopped playing, K raised one hand as she continued to stare up at Noh for a moment. "What happened before he defied your Supreme Intelligence?" K asked. "I ask because in my experience, it's not like him to be so … defiant."

"Immaterial to the matter at hand," Ronan said dismissively.

"How is it immaterial if it alters how he reacted?" K asked. "To this day he has never said a word against your people."

There was a bit of a murmur at that, as it didn't quite fit with the actions of a traitor, and Ronan narrowed his eyes but tipped his head toward Noh. "Inform your counsel," he said in an obviously annoyed tone.

Noh glanced around the crowd and then rested his gaze on Hank for just a moment. "I was appointed Protector of the Earth by the Supremor himself," he said, his chin a little higher as he said it. "In the course of my duties, I was ordered by the Supremor to retrieve part of the Phoenix Force to be used in defense of Earth." His eyes flashed for a moment before he turned to Ronan. "When I did so, I brought it here, to Hala, where I was told it would be used to further the Empire, _not_ to defend Earth."

"So," K said in a measured tone. "You were given this task, which you performed, only to find that the entity that you'd given your full faith to had ordered you to do this under a lie. You were taken advantage of. By an authority that had no reason to abuse that power."

K's words brought down murmurs and a few angry shouts from the Kree around them, and Ronan had to call for order, as they were unused to what amounted to blasphemy to their minds in those halls.

"Would you have brought them the Phoenix Force for furthering the Empire had they simply told you the truth to start with?" K asked.

Noh paused over his answer. "Perhaps," he said at last. "I cannot know for certain, and I cannot change the past."

"And as you have said yourself, counsel, only his actions are in question here," Ronan pointed out. "Not conjecture."

K gave Ronan an almost warm smile. "Yes, that's true. I'm just trying to understand why your Supremor lied when the boy certainly would have done as he was asked. Unless the intention was exactly this. Make him go against the Kree. Set him up for a fall and dispose of him once he was no longer useful."

Once more, Ronan had to call for order in the domed building before he cut K a hard glare. "You may be ignorant of our customs, Terran, but that does not excuse your blasphemy and insults."

"I did not intend to trifle with your emotions," she replied.

"You trod on our beliefs and leadership. Ignorance does not excuse you," Ronan said sharply. "Every Kree is expected to obey the Supremor. Your conjectures are baseless and border on inflammatory."

"Exactly. Every Kree is expected to obey. So there is no reason for the Supremor to lie. Yet, against all sense, it still happened."

"Noh-Varr is not of this universe and had lived on Earth for the entirety of his time in this reality. There was a question as to his loyalty."

"But still, he has never spoken a word against our universe's Supremor, or the Kree — in any capacity. All Kree, even in his universe, are held to the same tenet," K replied.

Ronan turned toward Noh, who nodded slightly. "Hala has always had my loyalty, no matter the universe," he said in a nearly soft tone.

Ronan leaned back as he considered the answer. "Under the circumstances," he said at last, "I am prepared to lessen the severity of the charges in the matter of the Supremor."

"Thank you," K said. "I only want the truth to be known."

"That is the goal of every Kree trial," Ronan said dismissively. "However, there is still the matter of the theft of advanced weaponry and the sabotage of an entire research division."

"Yes, of course. You refer … I'm afraid I'm unclear, admittedly, I'm new to much of this," she said, flat out ignoring the X-Men in the gallery in various states of disbelief. "Was this the Phoenix Force itself? Or something designed to imitate it?"

 _What are you doing?_ Rachel projected to K, though she didn't answer her.

"If I may," Noh said, inclining his head toward Ronan, who nodded. "The weapons I stole were largely in self-defense, as I was being hunted for my defiance — but one in particular was derivative of the Phoenix Force. Not the Force itself, but an imitation — and incredibly powerful."

"And intended for the defense of this planet and the Kree Empire," Ronan interjected. "In taking the weapon, Noh-Varr also destroyed an entire research division and several other projects for the defense of Hala."

"I understand." K took a breath, held it and turned to Ronan again. "Is it permissible to call a witness — an expert in this field?"

Ronan shook his head at her for a moment. "You have seen the evidence for yourself and delayed the sentence long enough."

"I promise on my own life not to ask for any more time, but I see that I do need to clarify something — if nothing else, for the rest of the accused's family," K said in a smooth, silky tone. "And then you'll never be bothered by me again, and I will not return to Hala unless it's by your invitation." She gave him a smile that had Logan slightly uncomfortable — and by the look on Scott's face, he'd caught it too.

Ronan's eyes were narrowed as he let out a scoff of a breath. "Call your witness, Terran," he said with a dismissive wave. "And then allow us to proceed in peace without your paltry showmanship."

"Rachel Summers, please," K said clearly as she turned to look at the gathered group with a smirk. "The most current expert on the Phoenix Force."

"Please, K, do not pull any more of our friends into this," Noh said softly.

"This is the part, if I am to understand what my new friend Ronan says, where the accused shuts the hell up," K snarled his way before she turned to Rachel. "Miss Summers, _please_." She gave Rachel a pleading look as she hoped that Rachel had gone ahead and taken the chance to read K's mind as to what she was thinking.

Rachel stood up and let out a shaky breath as she stepped forward to where the Accuser was headed her way. But — before he could reach her, she extended her arms, closed her eyes and lifted off the ground as the massive fire-bird form of the Phoenix encased her.

"K…" Noh was staring at her openly. "This is not a good idea."

"You've married into a protective family, Noh. Learn to trust us," K told him before she turned her back to him.

After that, K and Rachel were blatantly ignoring him as the doors around the entire dome slammed shut and locked with Rachel's telekinetic forces. For a moment, the Accusers rushed for both Rachel and K in an attempt to stop the inevitable, but they had hardly taken five steps forward before it all went strangely still, with objects floating around them as the fire burned hotly.

"The scent of fear in this room is overwhelming," K said as she turned to Ronan. " _Don't_ cross my family, boy. This entire trial is based on a lie. One that would not have had this kind of long reaching impact had your leaders done what was right in the first place. All of the repercussions of Noh's so-called disobedience are the direct result of the lie that your Supremor perpetrated. He would _never_ have done anything that he was accused of had it not been for that simple fact. Your people set him up for this failure. Nothing done was premeditated or meant to be treasonous."

Rachel fixed her gaze upward and one by one, all of the Accusers simply crumpled to the ground before she turned her attention to Ronan. "You will not follow us," Rachel directed. "All the charges have been satisfied. You have fulfilled your duties here today, and you will remember nothing of what has transpired here." He frowned before his eyes unfocused, and a few moments later, Ronan the Accuser was in a crumpled heap and Rachel released Noh from his restraints.

"Come on, we gotta get outta here before they wonder what happened," K said to Noh, who looked simply _stunned_ as he absently shook out his hands. "Unless you like the idea of breaking Jubilee's heart — in which case, I'll let Logan kill you."

"No, no," Noh said quickly. "I am perfectly content not to face execution, thank you." He put a hand on her shoulder before he broke form and pulled her into a hug. "You were magnificent," he told her low. "I have _never_ seen Ronan or _any_ Grand Accuser even consider changing his mind once it has been made up."

"Then even _he_ must have had doubts about the basis of the charges," K pointed out.

"As I understand it, he has not had the cleanest relationship with the Supremor either," Noh whispered to her with a smirk.

"Then we got the right Accuser," she replied.

Noh chuckled as he released her and took a step back as the rest of the X-Men made their way to where the main show had been.

"That was a risk," Scott said with a clearly stern expression, though it wasn't clear if he was talking to K or to Rachel … or to both of them.

"I … didn't see anyone else with a plan," K defended. "And honestly, I was trying to buy you time to figure something out that would have been smoother."

 _You had no plan,_ Rachel projected to her.

 _He doesn't know that. Shut up._ K replied.

_He knows._

_He suspects. Totally different._ The two of them stood side by side, hands clasped behind their backs with identical expressions on their faces. _You're going to blow it if you laugh. So help me ..._

"The Phoenix isn't something you pull out of your back pocket to _buy time_ ," Scott said in near disbelief at both of them.

"That … wasn't the buying time part," K replied. "All the digging for loopholes was buying time."

"And surprisingly effective," Kurt said with a little smirk as Logan stepped around him to take his date back. Finally.

"I feel like we should be insulted for how easily Ronan was willing to believe her 'clueless' act," Rachel said.

"Well, you are Terrans," Noh said. "And while my universe did away with the hierarchical structures for gender distinctions long ago… this one is not the same."

"Well. that was a bad assumption," Jubilee said.

"No kidding," Kate had to agree.

America smirked at the group of them before she opened up a glowing star behind her. "Well as fun as it is to watch stupid blue sexist idiots get their comeuppance…. I now declare you a free husband. Kiss the bride when we get back. Or before. Whatever," she said as she kicked through the star and held out her hands. "Exit stage left."

The little group of wedding guests quickly followed America's lead, though it was clear she was tiring out significantly by the time they got back to the mansion. She wasn't sure she could land them in the wedding venue, so she wanted to hit something she _knew_ she could do — and the mansion was the best spot for all her passengers anyway.

As everybody filed through the star, she made sure they all left ahead of her and then stepped through and immediately slid into the nearest chair, completely wiped out. "I _hate_ going to Hala," she muttered into her hands, bent over and trying to get her breath back.

"You shouldn't need to go again for his sake," Rachel told her. "They have no idea any of us were there."

"Almost a shame. That was a good show, _chica_."

"It was," Kurt agreed with a grin. "Who knew we had such _dramatic_ housemates."

"I'm sorry my home world is so difficult for you," Noh said in a subdued tone, one arm around Jubilee's waist as he snagged her as she passed. "In happier times, it is truly magnificent and beautiful."

"Maybe it was before," Scott allowed with a small shrug, though he lost some of his frown when Rachel made her way over to give him a quick little hug for not freaking out.

"There are other Halas," Noh said with a heavy sigh. "The one I called home was transcendently beautiful." He pressed a soft kiss to the side of Jubilee's head as she was trying to glare at him without much heat. "But make no mistake: I am more than pleased with the home I have here."

"We're just glad you get to stay here," Kate pointed out, shaking her head at him.

"Yes, it would be a shame to welcome you into our family only to lose you so quickly," Hank said mildly before he narrowed his eyes the slightest bit. "It would not be fair."

"No, it would not," Noh agreed. "I'm truly glad things worked out the way they did."

"Congratulations," K told him before she turned to leave with Logan. "I'm sure Rachel needs something done as payment."

Noh turned immediately to Rachel with an open expression. "What do you think would be appropriate?"

"I'll … get back to you," Rachel said. "Just don't get into any more trouble, okay?"

"I believe between SHIELD and the Accusers, I have used up the trouble that might have followed me from my past — barring of course, the Dark Avengers," Noh said with a soft smile before Jubilee gave him an actual glare and smacked him in the arm. "I ... was not trying to call down more trouble," he told her in alarm. "I don't believe in jinxing."

"That's because you _are_ the jinx," said America with a grin before she grabbed K by the arm before she could get too far. "Hey, hey. Pay up."

"How could I forget. What kind of kiss are you looking for?" K asked.

America smirked. "You lead, I'll follow. Just this once."

That got an actual smile from the little brunette as she stepped forward and gave America an honest kiss square on the mouth, complete with a dip. "We good now?"

"Real good," America replied with a smirk.

K turned to Scott with a little sigh on her way toward the stairs, in need of some space. "I don't need to debrief, right? Because according to Rachel — none of that happened. And also — you were there, and I'm sure … incredibly observant of the nothing that didn't happen."

"We'll talk in the morning. I think everyone here could use a break after all that," Scott allowed.

"We're sleeping in," Logan called out. "Don't come knocking."

"I'll find you at lunch then."

Kate was shaking her head at the whole scene as she slipped her arm around Kurt's middle. "That's not a bad idea. Sleeping in," she told him with a grin.

"I think it'll be a theme," Kurt said with a smirk.

"Quiet mornings. I like it. Might even get around to leaving the room," Kate replied with a wicked grin. "You know. If I'm not _too_ occupied with the man I love."

"Do I know him?" Kitty asked as she walked by with a little smirk.

"I'll introduce you," Kate shot back. "He's really cute."

Kurt just shook his head at her and pulled her in tightly. "Upstairs then?"

"Yes, I think so," she replied with a grin. "We might even walk."

"That seems frivolous considering how we've been travelling all day," Kurt answered low.

"Jealous of the star power?" she teased.

"I don't know what you mean," Kurt said with a growing smile. "I _am_ the star power."

Kate had to laugh at that as she wrapped her arms around his neck. "Yes, you sure are."


	3. Sneaky Ferals

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Kate finds out how sneaky the ferals really can be right under her nose, but only after Clint pointed it out.

For the most part, the mansion residents who had stayed over the summer were enjoying the chance to relax now that the school year was out, but that simply wasn't the case for Scott.

He had been taking a hard look at the school and the team and everything else in front of him ever since he'd spoken with Kate at the beginning of the year. He absolutely believed her when she told him that Charles Xavier had spoken with her, but… he wanted to _deserve_ that kind of praise.

Still, it was nice to know he had that support, even if it wasn't totally deserved. Yet.

But it had gotten the wheels turning in his head, and shortly after the school year ended, just a few days after Jubilee's wedding, he had made the first diplomatic overture.

It was just a simple message. He wanted to meet with Captain America — he'd even come to the Avengers if they wanted him to — and anyone else they felt he needed to meet with so that they could start to repair the relationship between the X-Men and the Avengers.

It was obvious that the Avengers didn't know what to make of his request, but Cap had agreed to it, if nothing else because he was curious.

As Scott got to the Avengers mansion, he had to shake off the feeling that he was walking into enemy territory. He was there to mend fences, after all, though it didn't stop the adrenaline all the same. It wasn't like he could exactly help it. He didn't have the best track record with these guys, and he was sure they probably thought the same thing about him, if he was being honest.

Still, it wasn't like things weren't improving. Since Kate had joined the X-Men, the other Hawkeye had been over often, and through a combination of asking about K and having Logan on the team, the Black Widow, of all people, had become a recognizable face at the mansion, something that Scott could never have predicted. Then there were Kate's Young Avenger friends, several of whom were now fully-fledged Avengers…

Yes, things were improving. But that didn't change the fact that the Avengers met Scott with their heavy hitters. Cap was there, along with Iron Man, Thor, and Captain Marvel.

There was no small talk as they headed inside, and it wasn't until they were all seated at a large table that Scott cleared his throat to speak. He had spoken in front of world leaders before, so this wasn't entirely new, but the idea itself was new enough that he had to admit to being a little nervous.

"I have a proposal," he said as the four heavy-hitting Avengers watched him carefully, "to try to bridge the gap between our two teams." When he didn't seem to hit any resistance yet, he nodded. "The Avengers have had X-Men on their teams before, but until recently, the X-Men haven't had any Avengers join their team."

"Kate speaks highly of all of you," Steve said with a slow and measured nod.

"She's great," Scott agreed with an honest smile. "And having her on the team has been a learning curve for us as much as her. Our teams travel in such different circles that we had to start an entirely different training regimen for her so she could deal with our brand of trouble." He glanced around the table and took a breath to hold it for a moment. "And I realized — as long as our teams stay that separate, we're going to keep having a hard time understanding each other. It's hard to empathize with something you don't experience personally."

"So, what are you proposing?" Carol asked, her hands folded in front of her as she leaned forward in her seat. "What, are you recruiting?" she asked, sounding almost insulted by the idea.

"Not exactly," Scott said, shaking his head. "More like… an exchange program."

The Avengers around the table looked dubious and in various states of suspicious, but Scott was relieved to see that Steve, at least, was nodding along, entirely serious as he thought it over. "That's not a bad idea," he said, and Scott let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Usually, there was a lot more yelling at this stage when it came to reasoning with the Avengers, so this was going well.

"It would be good for my team to see what kind of problems the Avengers face," Scott said. "This isn't just about wanting to show the Avengers what the X-Men deal with. I'll be honest: there are times talking to Kate or her friends that I just haven't heard of some of the people or problems she's talking about."

"So how would this 'exchange program' work?" Steve asked, seeming to take the lead as he looked honestly engaged by the idea and leaned forward.

"That's what I came to talk to you about," Scott admitted. "I don't want to ask for more permanent positions or assignments; a few days or a week would be fine to get a feel for each other's teams, and we could involve more people that way instead of relying on one or two people to carry the interests of their respective teams to the other all the time."

"We'll start with a few days at a time," Steve suggested. "And we'll go in pairs." He smirked the slightest bit as he added, "No one likes to be the odd man out."

Scott had to smirk and nod at that before he slid forward a roster for the X-Men. "This is everyone on the team right now," he said. "I'm not going to invite myself or my team into your home. This is your call."

"That's it?" Tony said, his voice metallic inside the suit as he shook his head. "We just pick some names, you pick some names, and we start singing 'Kumbaya' with each other?"

"Well, I'm not expecting singing in the first week," Scott said with a barely-concealed smirk and was surprised to find that Thor was chuckling quietly. He glanced toward the broad Asgardian, raised an eyebrow, and added, "You can choose the Avengers to send, and we can work out a schedule with the fuller rosters after we've had a few trial runs."

"Why the generosity?" Carol asked in a clearly suspicious tone.

"It was my idea," Scott said simply. "I'm not here to make demands."

"Then … really. Where is this coming from?"

"I told you," Scott said, keeping his tone even. "I'm just trying to find a way for our teams to understand each other a little better. I think we could all benefit from it."

"Xavier always tried to get humans and mutants to coexist, but he didn't really do much of that in action — just ideals," Steve said. "I'm guessing this is your social experiment to see if it actually will hold water."

"You could call it that," Scott allowed. He took in a deep breath. "I'm just trying to live up to what we've been saying all along."

"Like you said," Steve replied, watching Scott carefully. " _We've_ had mutants on the team for years. It kind of seems like you're testing your people — if this isn't some …"

"If anyone on your team feels like they aren't being treated well by my team, I promise I'll address and fix it the moment it's brought to my attention," Scott said. "I don't think you'll have anything to worry about, but if that's your concern, I can tell you everyone at that mansion honestly believes in the vision that Professor Xavier had for peaceful coexistence." He shook his head minutely. "It's not a test. It's… an olive branch." He paused. "We've had non-mutants on our team for years, but they've been aliens or non-humans. It's time we start living up to our creed when it comes to humanity and the way we treat you."

The gathered Avengers seemed to share a glance that held an entire conversation as they considered it, and while it was impossible to read Iron Man, it seemed Thor, at least, was entertained by the idea if the grin was anything to go by.

"I'm not expecting an answer today," Scott clarified. "Take your time. But we'll never be able to even start to find a middle ground if I don't ask."

"We'll talk it over with the full team," Steve said after a moment. "But I think you can expect a call before week's end, either way."

* * *

It didn't take long for the word to spread through the mansion that the Avengers and the X-Men were going to start swapping members — and by the sound of things, just about everyone was excited by the idea. Kate in particular had already been bugging Scott to know what the rotation would be and when she could expect to see her old Young Avengers buddies in the school — and insisting that he make sure that there was no scheduling conflict so that she wouldn't be out on rotation when they were at the school.

And it didn't matter that Scott told her the Avengers were choosing who to send. She still bugged him.

So when the rotation did start up, Kate was _beyond_ thrilled to see that the Avengers had decided to send over Clint and Natasha — since the two of them had been over to the institute often enough lately that they were a safe first choice — as the first part of the exchange program.

They were only a couple days into the four-day rotation, but already, Kate was loving it, and she was sure to be the one to answer the door when the bell rang, and Clint and Natasha were standing there — and Clint had the _biggest_ grin on his face.

"Katie," he said as he rushed forward in two steps and wrapped her in a hug as if she hadn't just literally seen him a day ago. "Katie, have you met Gerry yet?"

"Yeah, Clint, I saw him, like, about a month ago," Kate said, shaking her head at him. "Jess came by the mansion a few weeks after he was born. You missed the hug magnet."

"Yeah, I did. But _Katie_ , have you seen him smile?"

Kate was grinning ear to ear. She had _never_ seen Clint like this, and it was especially fun to see when he had been so down about being sure he was Gerry's father beore. "Yeah, I heard babies do that at three months," she said, unable to stop smiling.

" _Katie_." He was digging in his pocket for his phone. "You gotta see the pictures. I took a bunch."

Kate couldn't stop from laughing as Clint pulled up the pictures, and she looked past him to Natasha. "Has he been like this all day?"

Natasha smirked the slightest bit — the kind of longsuffering expression that Kate had come to recognize when it came to these two. "Pretty much."

Kate just shook her head and grinned as Clint handed her the phone and she scrolled through the pictures of little Gerry Drew. The little guy had finally grown enough hair that you could tell in the pictures that he was blonde and not bald, but it was still that delicate light color that made it hard to tell. And in every single one of the pictures, it looked like Gerry was full-on laughing.

"I think he likes you, Clint," Kate said with a grin as Clint nodded his agreement.

"I kept pulling faces," he explained. "Actually, he got kinda mad when I stopped and had to go." He looked pretty proud, his chest slightly puffed out for a moment before he shrugged. "Anyway, Jess said I can stop by whenever if I want to, you know. Babysit or something."

Kate and Natasha shared a look that clearly read they weren't going to bring up the conversation they'd had at Natasha's favorite spa when they pulled Jess out for a day of "mommy pampering." Which, in the case of Kate and Natasha, was code for telling Jess to pull her head out and at the very least _let Clint be part of things_ , even if she wasn't going to admit she'd gotten pregnant while she was dating him. And given birth to a blonde-haired, blue-eyed Clint replica.

Jess was so, so far in denial.

 _Baby steps_ , Natasha had said, with a look that told Kate she was actually thinking about murder. Which was a very scary look.

"She should just take Gerry by your place," Kate said conversationally. "Has she been by recently?"

Clint sighed and shook his head. "Nah, but you know. Single mom. She's busy." His shoulders slumped the slightest before he seemed to shake it off. "Anyway, I just — you know — thought you'd want to see the pics."

"He looks just like you," Kate said with a grin.

"You think?" Clint brightened instantly, and Natasha snorted.

Kate just grinned at her old mentor as she gestured for the two of them to follow her. "You're early. Scott and Kurt are still listening to Tony be an idiot for their rotation," she told them with a grin. "Let's grab some coffee, huh?"

Clint grinned at her and nodded, still walking on air as the three of them made their way to the kitchen. "I gotta ask, Katie — I mean, you'd know. How's it on the other side?" Clint asked as he filled himself up a cup of coffee. "I mean, I totally love the whole 'coming to the mansion' part of the exchange program, but your boyfriend? He gets to deal with Stark. I'm just curious."

"He's more patient than people realize," Kate said with a little smirk. "But I think he'll be glad when the rotation switches."

"Not me. I like being the foreign exchange student at the school," Clint laughed. "Best idea Cyclops has ever had."

"He's running on epiphany juices," Kate said with a quiet smirk into her coffee mug.

Once the three of them had been properly caffeinated, Kate suggested that they head down to the Danger Room. "Scott and Kurt will probably meet us there anyway. Just 'port right into the booth," she said with a smile as they headed for the elevator.

The three of them made their way down and grabbed seats up in the booth, though the Danger Room was already in use, and Natasha was more than happy to watch the show as K and Logan sparred — while Clint excitedly told Kate more about his visit with Gerry.

Scott and Kurt were running a bit late though — and the sparring match down below was far more interesting anyway, as it was a tossup as to who would win any given day. As Clint leaned over to watch, K kicked Logan's legs out from under him and, in a second, used his fall to pin him. But instead of trying to throw her, Logan picked his head up the slightest bit, turned his head toward her, and whispered something that not even the cameras in the booth could pick up — but Clint could.

It was an easy phrase to lip-read, too, because of the switch from m's to r's, but still Clint had to stare for a second, sure he had _not_ just seen Logan say the words "Marry me."

Natasha put a hand on Clint's arm with a little smirk. "I can teach you that move if you want," she teased, which only got him to look at her for a second with wide eyes and pure, open surprise.

Luckily, he was saved when first the bamfs and then Scott and Kurt made their appearance, and of course, a couple of the bamfs went straight to Nat to growl at her just so they could get a growl in response and dissolve into giggles.

"How was it?" Kate asked, slipping right over to Kurt to wrap her arms around him as she took in his expression. "Did the bamfs get into Tony's robots again?"

"They went right for the workshop," Scott said, shaking his head at the little guys, who just giggled delightedly and didn't look the least bit sorry.

"It's only because Tony complained about it so much," Kurt said as he looked between the two non X-Men. "He whines about those things like a child."

"That's what I keep telling him," Clint agreed with a wide grin and a nod before the grin widened into something more obnoxious as he dropped his voice. "Hey - have you seen Gerry lately?"

"Clint saw him today. There are pictures. He's very proud," Kate explained to Kurt in nothing even close to a whisper. "He was getting baby belly laughs all day."

"You should show the whole team when we're done here," Scott suggested with a grin. "That's a great age. Annie's nephew was adorable at three months."

"I'll make sure Annie sees 'em too," Clint replied easily, which got a _look_ from Scott before Scott just shook his head at him and leaned over to the microphone.

"Stay put — we're coming down to you," he told Logan and K, which only had Logan snorting out a little laugh, considering he was still pinned.

The five of them headed down from the booth to join the two ferals as Clint apparently couldn't wait and was already showing off the pictures on his phone to Kurt. "And this one? Oh man. He couldn't stop laughing for a good few minutes. I think Jess was concerned," Clint was saying with a _huge_ grin.

Kurt made a beeline for Logan and K and tipped his head to Clint. "Have you shown them this yet?" Kurt asked.

Clint shook his head. "Pics from this morning," he explained to Logan, still wearing the wide grin. "Gerry's smiling."

The two of them took a peek and K raised one eyebrow high. "Oh yeah. That ... Kate? What did I tell you about this? Kid's just missing a bandage."

"I already told Clint he looks just like him," Kate said, grinning.

"Smells better though," K said to Clint.

"Except when he needs a change," Clint shot back.

"Nope, still smells better than you on any given day."

"Well," Clint said, pausing to consider it. "Yeah, that's true. He's kinda perfect. Jess does good work."

"Even with what little she had to work with," K said with a smirk. "You gonna do the proud daddy thing all day or are we going to get to work?"

But at the word 'daddy', Clint suddenly seemed to deflate. "He's… he's Jess's. I just love him is all," Clint said lamely as Kate let out a huff of breath behind him.

"You've got to be kidding me," Logan said before he reached up and popped Clint in the back of the head.

"What?" Clint rubbed his head where Logan had hit him.

"I'll draw you a diagram later. Let's get to work," he replied.

Still rubbing his head, Clint just chuckled. "Make sure Cyclops gets in on the learning. You know — seeing as he's all 'three months is such a great age'."

"I'll be sure to tell that to his time-displaced son next time I see him," Logan replied.

"Well, Cable _is_ such a baby sometimes," Clint shot back, still grinning.

Scott looked between the two of them for a moment before he just let out a sigh that came from having to deal with exactly this kind of behavior far too often. "Right," he said, calling their attention back to him. "We'll be running an invasion scenario. Kree — just to make sure everyone's up to date."

"Again?" Kate laughed, knowing it wasn't as much a matter as keeping everyone "up to date" as it was Scott still feeling sore that the Kree had tried to ruin Jubilee's wedding and wanting to prevent any further problems down the line — for the newlyweds and for the team in general.

"What's it you're always telling your students, Kate? Practice until it's second nature?" Scott shot back with a smirk.

"Should we do it blindfolded then?" K asked him from just behind his elbow. "Because that might be fun."

"Just run the simulation," Scott said, shaking his head at her.

"You heard him," Logan said to K. "No fun."

"No wonder he's taking so long with Annie," Clint chimed in.

Scott shot them all the dryest look he could manage before he called out the command codes to start up the sim, and Kree soldiers descended on the New York streets immediately.

* * *

It didn't take much pushing for Kate to convince Clint and Natasha to stay for dinner, especially when Kate "suggested" to Clint that Pete was a great baby photographer if he was in the market. "Besides, Annie needs smiling baby pictures, and you know it," Kate added with a grin as she steered them toward the kitchen. "Plus, Remy's cooking."

"Oh, well, don't twist my arm," Clint said, laughing.

Of course, once they were in the dining room, Kurt was sure to point Clint at anyone that he hadn't shown the pictures to yet, and the excited archer was off, grinning madly as he shared his phone with Annie while Kate and Kurt sat down across from him and Natasha, with Logan and K taking the seats across from Annie and Scott to watch Scott turn slightly pink as Annie gushed over the pictures.

"He's sure excited for someone who says he's not the father," Kate whispered across the table to Natasha, who just smirked.

"He doesn't say _that._ He just says Gerry is Jess's," Natasha said. "He's a good liar. Very specific," she added, sounding suspiciously proud.

"Yeah. He's real believable when he's bought every kind of childproofing for his place and has trouble getting to the cereal in the morning," Kate snorted.

"Well, it's hard to keep up a lie when we all know the truth," Natasha said mildly, though she wasn't looking at Clint.

But Clint's excited Gerry gushing was interrupted when Remy came out with jambalaya, and the conversation turned from babies to the Avengers/X-Men exchanges and how they were going.

Clint was only half paying attention to Natasha's light teasing and suggestions of how to survive another few days of Tony's robots v. the bamfs, though, because Logan had leaned over to K to whisper something again, and he waited a moment, watching, sure that maybe he'd misread it the first time.

But no — there it was again. 'Marry me,' plain as day. And K gave Logan the dryest look after that as he grinned back at her— so there was no mistaking it.

Clint blinked in surprise several times before he turned to Kate. "How long's that been going on?" he asked her in a low undertone.

"What? Them dating? Pretty sure I told you about the daring Sabretooth rescue Scott and I pulled to get her here, remember?" Kate said with a light shrug and a smile, but Clint shook his head insistently.

"No, no, the other thing," he said, leaning forward with wide eyes. "The proposing. Is it a joke? It doesn't look like a joke." He said it just soft enough for her to hear, and maybe for Kurt to hear, considering he was looking so shocked — though there was also the enhanced hearing down the table to consider, even if they didn't look like they'd heard him, too busy kissing to scowl their way anyhow.

"Wait...what?" Kate stared at him in shock. "Clint, that's not funny."

"I'm not kidding, Katie," he said, then leaned back in his chair, glanced at Logan and K, and sighed. "Tell you after dinner."

But that wasn't going to last long, considering the grin that was slowly spreading over Kurt's face and the purely dumbfounded look on Kate's. The two of them waited only long enough for Clint to finish eating before they excused themselves and all but dragged Clint out of the dining room.

" _Spill_ ," Kate commanded him as soon as they'd pulled him into the nearest empty classroom.

"I mean, you guys didn't catch it?" Clint asked, rubbing the back of his neck. "He's been saying 'marry me' in her ear. I thought it was a joke?" He looked between the two of them. "It's not a joke, is it?"

Kurt was trying to stow the grin as he shook his head. "He's never joked about that before. Ever."

"Well then." Clint looked between the two of them. "Well, good for them. I guess?"

"They're not engaged," Kate pointed out.

"Yeah, I didn't see a yes, so I figured that one out, thanks, Hawkeye," Clint said dryly. "But seriously. How long has it been going on? I figured you guys would know."

"I haven't heard her say anything about it," Kate said, looking to Kurt with both eyebrows raised. "Did you know?"

"No, he didn't say anything to me," Kurt said with a little shake of his head. "When did this happen?"

"During training, when she pinned him," Clint said. "And then again during dinner. It's a multiple times a day thing, apparently." He looked between the two of them. "You seriously missed it? Don't you _live_ with these guys?"

"Yeah, but apparently he's been all sneaky about it," Kate said with a bit of a frown as she looked between the two men. "Besides, he'd probably have told us if she said yes. Which she won't. Not for a while, anyway." She shook her head. "Surprised she didn't run. Or hide."

"That's a good sign then, yes?" Kurt said.

Kate looked up at him for a moment and then let out a breath. "Yeah, that's true," she had to admit. "Must mean she likes him," she added in an attempt at a teasing tone.

"Then this is our new hobby, it seems. Watching for the multiple-times-a-day proposal," Kurt said, grinning again.

"What, you're going up against a Hawkeye in a sightseeing competition?" Kate teased.

"Yes, I think so," Kurt said with a nod. "Since this is the kind of spotting competition I think I can win."

"And what do I get when I win?" she teased.

"We're not betting," Kurt said. "This is just for bragging rights."

"And Logan calls me the Chicken Hawk," Kate said.

"Dangerous grounds," Kurt laughed.

"Put your money where your mouth is," she shot back.

"Woah, okay, you two. I can leave? If you'd like privacy?" Clint said, pointing at the door. "Do you ever stop, or does Hank just feed you intravenously at this point?"

"Well, sometimes we drink water," Kate laughed as she snaked her arms around Kurt's waist.

"Whiskey," Kurt replied.

"That's what I said," she replied. "Water."

"Yeah. I'm just going to go now. I'm not even going to make up a reason anymore? You two are ridiculous." Clint shook his head at both of them. "Good luck on your new hobby. Tell me who wins and spots the yes, huh?" Clint waved at them half-heartedly over his shoulder as he headed for the door.

"That sounds like a fair enough game," Kurt said, turning to Kate with the full force of an impish grin as he added, "Of course — I'll win."

"You so will not," Kate said, drawing herself up and poking him in the chest.

"I will," Kurt countered, stealing a quick kiss as the impish grin turned even moreso.

"With confidence like that, you'll have to put up something more than bragging rights," she said, taking a step closer.

"Alright then," Kurt said, pulling her in closer with both hands on her back. "Tell me what you want if by some miracle you win — which you won't."

"Three days in the Pacific. Just you and me — Logan can watch the army," she replied after a moment of thought.

"That is entirely doable," Kurt replied. "And incredibly unfair."

Kate drew a little halo over her head. "I don't know what you're talking about. I always play nice," she said sweetly.

Kurt chuckled and shook his head, stealing another long kiss as he thought it over before he finally decided, "Same time — but out to Alaska again."

"In the cold?" She wrinkled her nose.

"For fires, yes." He gave her a crooked grin.

"Done." She nodded once and stood on her toes to kiss him. "You drive a hard bargain." He just chuckled at that, one hand in her hair to keep her close and kiss her all over again.


	4. The Hazards of Dating Wolverine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kurt and Kate have a bet going on - and both are determined to win. But as is the natural order of things, nothing is quite that easy, and there is always some kind of a speed bump when competition gets thick with Kart. Will Logan get his answer?

Kate was in an excellent mood as she finished doing her hair for her upcoming interview and checked her lipstick in the mirror one more time. She was humming lightly to herself when Kurt came behind her and rested his chin on her shoulder.

"You seem to be in a good mood this morning," he said with a grin as he lightly kissed her cheek.

"I'm already winning," Kate replied. "Saw a proposal this morning over coffee. Point to the Hawkeye." She turned to plant a deep red kiss on his cheek, leaving a print on his fur.

"That's just one," Kurt replied. "Clint has two. We should put a number on this."

"I thought we were going until she said yes," Kate replied. "Or can you not wait for the island adventure?" she teased.

"I can't wait for the _Alaskan_ adventure," Kurt countered.

"Seeing as I'm already ahead, you're just going to have to pack your swimming trunks, sweetheart," Kate said before she donned more lipstick and just used it to kiss his cheek again, earning a little chuckle from Kurt, who knew exactly what she was doing. She considered it for a moment before she said, "But seeing as she's probably not going to say yes anytime soon — we'll call it first to a hundred or first to see a 'yes,' whichever comes first."

"Stipulations," Kurt said before he kissed her behind her ear. "No throwing this by talking to her about it, and I won't talk him into doing it when I'm around. Which you know he would."

"That's entirely true," Kate agreed as she leaned into him. "Alright, _schön_ , that's fair enough." She kissed him one more time, reapplied her lipstick, and let out a sigh. "Well. Off to the vicious world of business press."

"Be safe," he said at a growling whisper.

"Don't worry. I'm bringing a good bodyguard with me," she replied with a light smile.

"Not the one that likes to irritate intergalactic evil?"

"Oh, is that a _concern_?" Kate teased.

"The way she tells it, she was a passive observer. You should have seen Scott after their debriefing. His color rivaled JJ," Kurt told her with a laugh. "Logan said he had Magneto face."

"I'm sad I missed it," Kate said, turning to face him properly as she just grinned up at him. "I've only ever seen Grandpa Magneto, so I don't feel like I get the full comparison, but you know — hazards of working with Billy and Tommy."

He grinned at her and stole a kiss as delicately as he could. "I'd like to take you to dinner tonight if you're free," Kurt said. "Ladies choice."

She beamed at him and pretended to think about it for a moment. "I think I can pencil you in," she said as she leaned up to kiss him back. "I'll have to talk to my secretary, _Liebende_." She came back down on her feet instead of standing on her toes. "And I really should meet her. I'll call you as soon as we're done with the interview so we can talk restaurants, okay?"

He just nodded her way before teleporting to who knows where, leaving her shaking her head at the little bamfs that had stuck behind and were waggling their eyebrows at her.

"Oh, it's not like you guys haven't seen us flirt before," she said dismissively, though she couldn't help but ruffle the hair on one of them on her way down to meet up with K.

The two girls climbed into Kate's little purple car, and Kate was grinning ear to ear as she fiddled with the radio. "No flirting with any of the other guests at the studio," she said with pretended sternness.

"Oh, come on, that was fun," K said with a little laugh. "I don't think he's used to anyone doing anything other than tripping over themselves to kiss his ass."

"It's not very often." Kate smirked her way. "Remind me to introduce you to Pepper Potts sometime. She'd love you."

"I'm sure," K said, grinning her way. "Would she play too?"

"She's more 'doesn't put up with his nonsense' than 'joins in the nonsense,' but she loves a good show," Kate said as they pulled out of the mansion.

"Ah, well. I'm not much for pageantry, but I can try."

Kate snorted. "Yeah. You're definitely not dramatic or showy. And I have red hair."

"Amazing dye job, Kate. I am impressed."

Kate just laughed and shook her head at K. "Actually, Kurt and I were just talking about you. Apparently, I missed Scott's JJ impression."

"Oh, he got a little uptight. He got over it pretty quickly, though," K said with a wave.

"Yeah, I saw Annie hanging out with him in the halls after the debriefs," Kate laughed. "I'd say she's not subtle, but sometimes I think she does it on purpose just so the rest of us know he's getting a little Southern relaxation. Just to give us hope."

"She's dramatic," K agreed.

"Must be a requirement to live in the house."

"Well then I guess I better move out," K said with a shrug. "Don't meet the requirements."

Kate just snorted at her, shook her head, and shrugged it off. "You know the little Kree you rescued in such a nondramatic fashion is on his way back from his honeymoon. Should be home tonight."

"I didn't rescue anyone," K insisted. "Rachel did all the work."

"Sorry. The little Kree you harassed in front of all his wedding guests," Kate amended with a laugh.

"I believe that it's in my job description to point out obvious jackassery?"

"He wasn't trying to be an idiot, you know," Kate said with a little shrug. "It's a cultural thing with them — full obedience to the Supremor or whatever."

"Yeah, and ignorance of the law is no excuse when you break it."

"I'm sure Jubes read him the riot act. You know. After a couple days of being relieved he was alive," Kate said with a little smirk.

K looked irritated for a moment. "Yeah, well — for a guy that said he didn't like brainwashing or mind-control he sure as hell defended that dumbass stuff while he was there with his stupid … cousin with the hammer or whoever the hell that moron was."

"Oh, you know, just the guy in control of Noh's homeworld," Kate said lightly. "Or at least, this reality's version of his home."

"He's a jackass, and I only regret not stabbing him in the face," K growled.

"Hey, no arguments on that one," Kate laughed.

"I was _going_ to shove my hand in his big mouth, but Rachel said it might start something." K shrugged. "Something about distinctive weapons."

"Yeah, I think Noh would appreciate it if you didn't start a Kree-Earth war on their wedding night?" Kate chuckled. "He'd totally fight on our side, but he'd hate it. I know he still misses home. Even if they wanted to kill him."

"I can understand that," K said with an easy nod. "Doesn't make him any less of a dumbass. A lovely, sparkling, moon-dusted dumbass. He's lucky I like him."

"He sure is," Kate said, her eyes twinkling with laughter.

"What's got you in such a great mood anyhow? You've been grinning since we left, and we're going so you can play on air footsie with the human Vesuvius. What gives?"

"Kurt and I made a bet. And I am sworn to secrecy or I forfeit, sorry. But I'm currently winning myself a trip to an island getaway."

"What does this involve?" she said with a frown. "Little Miss Omissions."

Kate chuckled. "I really can't tell you, or I lose, and I'm sorry, but I am super competitive. And I can't — I _can't_ lie to that fuzzy Elf, so don't ask me to tell you, because I will _lose_."

"So you want to tell me then?" K said, shifting in her seat to watch her a little better.

Kate just laughed again. "Yes and no," she admitted. "You could _so_ help me win. But also, that would be cheating _so hard_."

"Game isn't worth playing unless you can cheat," K replied.

Kate shrugged as they pulled into the studio. "Maybe I'll tell you after I win what we were betting on," she said. "I think there might be a part two to the bet. It's sort of long-term, and I might be able to get a cruise."

"I'll ask _him_ then," K replied.

Kate considered this with her head tipped to one side. "You know, that's not out of the rulebook," she said thoughtfully. "Kurt failed to mention any limitations on _him_ for that sort of thing…"

"Then while you're working on your next viral video? I'm going to talk to your boyfriend."

"Try not to steal his heart away. I'm sort of attached," Kate laughed.

"Yeah, no danger there," K replied with a roll of her eyes.

"Can't help that I'm territorial," Kate laughed as she and K got out of the car and headed toward the studio. She took a second to fluff up her hair once more and turned to K. "What do you think he'll come after me for this time? Sales are too high? People love my books _too_ much?"

"Oh, it's been awhile since he made an attack on your afterschool activites," K replied.

Kate smirked. "Which one? The one where I run with the X-Men or the one where I'm bedding a demon?"

"You know if you phrase it like that, he'd have a headline."

"I know. I'm careful around him. But still — it's fun to tell _you_."

"Yeah, not sure what the mess will be today, but if it's a real problem I'll just yank out the video cables."

"Hey, since he lightened up on the death thing, I've been able to handle him much better, but thanks for the offer," Kate said with a small smile as the two made their way to the backstage areas. Kate tipped her head at the makeup stand with a small grin. "I gotta go _not_ get done up. Have fun here. No flirting with other billionaires who might offer you a better job."

"I'll try to restrain myself," K sang back to her. "But the last one …he was close. So close. You know I have a thing for dark hair."

Kate had to laugh. "Then it's a good thing I was lying about being a redhead," she teased. "Must be what's keeping you on my payroll."

"It's all about the benefits, Kate," K called out as she turned to take in the people in the studio. No one was new; no one looked like they were trouble of any kind. They'd been down enough times now that the crew had gotten to where they'd recognized her and had a chair for her to sit in that made it easy to watch the goings on around the set and on the stage.

She had to smirk as Kate grinned her way through the head to head 'discussion' and lobbed every single curveball JJ threw at her right back to him, twisted just enough to make him either lose focus entirely or just sputter and turn various shades that just make Kate grin broader.

As usual, she ended the interview with what was quickly becoming a signature move from her where she more or less dropped the illusion of talking with JJ to promote one of her newest books, or talk up an author, and before too long, three segments were over, and they were done.

K grinned at her as she got off the set and was bouncing a bit with each step. It was rare for it to go _so_ well, but it just seemed to be Kate's day, and the little brunette took her arm as the two of them made their way out of the studio and toward the parking complex where the little purple car was camped out.

Kate was starting to go through the list of which restaurants were best for a Saturday night date, all but dancing in her seat as she thought out loud and the two of them settled in for the drive back to Westchester with "Count on Me" playing on the radio as she handed the attendant her parking ticket. The arm lifted, and they'd barely cleared it at all when the door on K's side of the car was positively torn off its hinges — and a moment later, the monstrous form of Victor Creed reached in and hauled K out by her ankles.

Before K could raise her hands to defend herself, he'd already hit her squarely at least three times and just flat disappeared with her into the city before Kate could even get unbuckled.

Kate floored it, trying to follow him, but even after she screeched around the corner where she'd seen them disappear, it was clear she had no real clues as to where to go next, and she was wide-eyed as she pulled to a stop and grabbed her phone to call for Kurt.

When he picked up, it was with a cheery ' _guten tag_ ' as he was clearly expecting her to have come up with someplace to eat, but she cut through before he could say anything else. "Kurt, I'm two blocks down from the studio. Get here as fast as you can — bring Logan. Sabretooth took K."

Kate had only just closed the trunk of her car, where she'd stashed her quiver and an extra bow, when she heard the familiar _bamf_ and turned to see both Logan and Kurt wearing looks of deep alarm.

"Where'd you see them last?" Logan asked, looking nervous as he watched her carefully.

Kate gulped in a breath and gestured down the street. "I saw him turn down this corner, but by the time I got here, they were gone." At that, Logan just took off running, and she was left explaining the rest to Kurt. She then waved her hand at the car door that was no longer there. "He ambushed us at the parking garage," she said. "Tore the door right off and knocked her senseless before I could even stop the car."

"Come on," Kurt said, offering his hand. "The bamfs are already looking. We'll find her quickly."

She took his hand with wide eyes and a nod as she adjusted the strap of her quiver, and the two of them teleported up to the nearest rooftop before taking off at a run as they looked between buildings and streets, Kate's hand still in Kurt's as they teleported from one place to another.

They were several stories up when they heard the telltale roar, and the two of them glanced at each other before Kurt teleported them toward the sound — and a few 'ports later, they were standing above the beginnings of a Logan and Creed showdown.

It was already more vicious than Kate had seen before as Creed wasn't even trying to taunt him anymore and the two of them were simply furious with each other. They were incredibly fast, slashing and stabbing. There was no way to tell easily who was coming out ahead, either — and even for a Hawkeye, it was a struggle just to keep up.

Just when it looked like Logan was going in for a solid hit, Creed sliced him open and threw him across the street, rattling the building that Kurt and Kate were standing on as he rushed after Logan with his claws out.

"Keep looking," Kurt told her, prodding her forward before he drew his swords and teleported down to try and help Logan end it quicker.

Creed drew his hand back to slash at Logan again, but Kurt ported into the way just long enough to send his blade through Creed's chest. An instant later, Kurt was sailing toward a building himself, but he had the frame of mind to teleport before he could actually hit and even went so far as to use the momentum to teleport into Creed's other side to drive two blades into his side.

When Kurt teleported away from Creed once more, Logan got up with a roar, and the two ferals locked up with their claws sunk into each other. Both of them were twisting and flexing to try and dig in deeper and cause as much damage and pain as possible to the other.

But now that Kurt was out of range, Kate, who clearly hadn't listened to Kurt, took the opportunity to line up her shot with a putty arrow … or… She paused and grabbed three more, aiming for each of his limbs. She pulled back on the string and just…. Waited for the shot.

 _There_. She let all four arrows fly, and in a second, the monster was pinned to the concrete wall of a nearby building, arms and legs splayed out. It wouldn't hold him long, but it didn't have to.

Once Creed was stuck into place a bit better, Logan darted back in again and jammed his claws into both sides of his neck before he slashed him wide open, finally dropping the beast to the concrete. He didn't bother speaking to either of his teammates before he just started to move again — backtracking to get away from the scene of the fight.

With Creed down, it was much easier for the three of them to get down to business finding K, though Kate did take the opportunity to shoot about five tranq arrows into Creed just for good measure so he wouldn't interrupt their search.

Logan followed the scent trail back the way they'd come until it led down into a crumbling passage under the buildings and streets, with the bamfs following them and simply waiting for the signal to spread out.

They went for blocks looking for any sign other than the scent that only Logan could follow as the little bamfs shined their little purple flashlights into the darkness. After what felt like miles underground in the creepy, dirty, abandoned subway line, it was a bamf that spotted K's hand, just barely visible in the debris. He ported over to her and was pulling on her hand — dirty and bloodstained as he called out to the others.

When Logan got to her, she was bleeding still from several places, her eyes were closed, and she was limp. It didn't take the guys any time at all to see how bad off she was. Her clothes were a mess — shredded and bloodied. But more disturbing than that was the odd angle her head was to her neck.

Kate was pretty sure she'd never seen that look on Logan's face before … and Kurt was watching his best friend with his breath caught in his chest. The bamfs were even perfectly still as they watched Logan get to work — almost mechanically doing what he thought needed to be done.

The first thing Logan did was make sure she had a pulse and was breathing before he turned to Kurt and looked positively sick, closed his eyes tightly, and took a solid hold on K's head to twist it sharply. A loud _crack_ echoed the empty subway walls around them, and Logan held his breath as he waited to see if K would respond.

It took some time — and no one wanted to move her until she opened her eyes and very tiredly reached out for Logan, who quickly scooped her up and pulled her tightly to his chest.

"Elf," Logan said quietly, though he didn't need to say another word before Kurt nodded — and between himself and the bamfs, the four of them found themselves just outside of Logan's room, where Logan simply carried K inside and closed the door behind him.

"I think our date has been postponed," Kurt said quietly. "I can take you back for your car, if you like."

"Yeah, I'll have to have someone look at it. I think it's broken," Kate said just as quietly, almost automatically. "Are they…" But she just let it drop.

"She's breathing, so she'll heal," Kurt told her. "Probably a bit shaken up. Both of them."

"Yeah, probably," Kate agreed, and she took Kurt's hand in hers and squeezed it lightly.

He picked her hand up to his lips and gave her a gentle kiss there before they teleported back to her car. "I'll stay with you," Kurt promised. "Since we didn't stick around to be sure he stayed down for a while."

"Thanks," she said as she climbed into the driver's seat and then paused, looking at the damage on the other side. "Probably don't want to ride shotgun."

"Oh, I'm not sure why not," Kurt tried to tease. "Airy ride. No seatbelt, though. That's probably worth a ticket if the policeman can get past the sight of a blue demon in shotgun."

"If we're lucky, it'll be Anton, and he can just tell Annie to get you in trouble instead of writing a ticket," Kate said with a little smile. "Much scarier."

Kurt smirked. "Did you get the license plate number on the monster that tore your door off, miss?"

"I think it started with A-5-5," Kate said with a little smirk.

"That sounds about right," Kurt agreed as he climbed in shotgun. "I'll take my chances."

She just smiled at him fondly. "You know... I think I might be in love with the little blue demon in shotgun."

He grinned and gave her a kiss. "How lucky that the feeling is entirely mutual."

* * *

Annie had heard about what happened — at least enough to know why Kate was at the stove cooking up eggs and sausages that morning.

"Want a hand?" she asked as she pulled out a few supplies to make a full-on breakfast casserole.

Kate looked up, grinned at her, and nodded, scooting over to give her space to work. A few of Kurt's little fuzzy friends were helping Kate — one of them was tying the sash of an apron around Kate's waist with a little grin, and another was carefully handing Kate eggs to crack.

"Did you promise to let them eat whatever you made?" Annie asked curiously as she held out her hand for a few eggs as well.

"No, I just spoil them rotten. We're going to play baseball later," Kate said with a shrug as she patted the apron-tying bamf's head affectionately.

"Well, and they like you," Annie pointed out as she measured out some salt and pepper to put in the casserole. She headed over to the fridge for some salsa. "I'm curious — did they decide they liked you right off, or did you have to win their approval?"

"Actually, this little guy kissed me before Kurt did. Right on the cheek," Kate said, ruffling the bamf by the eggs by the hair.

"How can you tell the difference?" Annie asked.

Kate blinked at her in surprise. "You just do after a while, I guess," she said. "They're each their own individual little fuzzballs. You learn to tell which one is which. This one," she added, poking the egg bamf in the tummy to make him giggle, "is the worst flirt of all of them."

"Well, I haven't spent as much time around them as you have," Annie said as she doled out some salsa in her egg mixture. "And I don't have your knack for spotting details."

"No, but you make a mean cupcake," Kate teased with a little grin.

"And a mean referee, if you need someone to make sure these little guys don't cheat when you play with them," Annie said with a smirk. "Years of practice keeping little kids in line."

"Oh, so that's why you're so good dealing with Bobby and Pete," Kate said, laughing as she scooped the scrambled eggs onto a plate.

"They're old enough to know better," Annie said, shaking her head.

"Yeah, you'd think so, wouldn't you?" Kate laughed. She tipped her head at one of the bamfs. "Annie should have an apron too, don't you think? We should match."

The little guy giggled, and a moment later, he teleported in front of her with a wide grin as he slipped the apron over Annie's head, to her delight. She booped the bamf's nose, and he cackled with glee before teleporting over to Kate for a kiss on the cheek.

"You really do spoil them," Annie laughed.

"I can't help it. They're just…"

"Yeah. They're Kurt's," Annie said with a knowing smile that had Kate blushing up to her ears.

"Yeah," she said softly before she went back to her sausages.

When Logan and K made their appearance some time later, amazingly, both of them looked worn out as they grabbed their coffee and headed over for the far corner in the kitchen, where they snuggled right up. K had leaned in right away with her head on his shoulder, and he'd kept one arm draped around her as they just tried to settle in under the radar.

Kurt came in not far behind them and had to laugh when he saw Annie and Kate and the massive breakfast they were creating. He slid behind Kate to wrap his arms around her and rest his chin on her shoulder. "This all looks marvelous," he told her, and she playfully batted him away as she finished putting everything on plates.

"I just did the easy stuff. Annie's the master chef here," she said as she started toward the table to set out the plates close enough to K and Logan that they could grab whatever they wanted. Annie did the same, and the two women dropped into seats as Kurt took the one between Logan and Kate.

"In any case, the two of you have brought us a fine meal," he told Kate with a smile as he slid a coffee cup her way.

"Kate gets most of the credit," Annie said, grinning. "I just came in for the finishing touches."

"You just came in to get bamf tips," Kate countered with a little laugh as she pointed her fork accusingly at Annie.

Annie laughed and put a hand over her heart. "I just think it's important to learn how to survive this crazy circus," she teased. "I haven't even been here for a year and already there have been two weddings and far more kidnappings than I'm entirely comfortable with."

"Oh, Annie, it was a slow year," Kate teased, and Annie looked affronted.

"Please tell me you're joking."

"Only a little bit," Kate said, then broke into a laugh at the look on Annie's face. "Don't worry. It comes in waves."

As the two women chatted and picked at each other, Logan tipped his head closer to K's to kiss the top of her hair before he nestled in a bit and gave her a little squeeze. "You gonna agree to marry me or do you need another scare?" he muttered very quietly, smirking to himself and expecting the usual cold shoulder until she just very gently nodded her head and tucked into his side a little tighter.

"Yeah, okay. Let's do it," K replied with a little rasp to her voice that had Logan simply stunned for a moment until he nodded and gave her another little kiss.

"Bout damn time you came around. Heal up already, wouldja? I don't like it when you're this quiet." K chuckled at him and snuggled in and rested her head on his shoulder as she closed her eyes again. Food could wait. She just wanted to curl up with him for now.

Neither of them had noticed the Elf sitting next to them with the grin that just kept getting wider… and wider until he leaned over to put a hand on Kate's arm and whisper in her ear, "It's time to start packing warm clothes for Alaska, _liebchen_."

Kate startled and turned toward him, eyes wide and eyebrows high. She looked over at the cuddled-up couple at the end of the table and then at Kurt. "Ha ha, very funny," she said dryly before Kurt just laughed at her.

"Deny it all you want, _Vogelchen_ , but I am right." He was grinning ear to ear and had his chest out a bit. "Make sure to pack those earmuffs of yours. You always look cute in them."

"Seriously?" Kate scrunched up her nose and looked past him at Logan and K. "Really? I mean ... really?" She was clearly working it over in her head, knowing Kurt wouldn't lie to her about it but still not quite believing it.

"I'm sure you can ask her about it when she's not attached," Kurt told her.

"Oh, well now I'll never get to hear the story," Kate laughed before she turned to face Kurt more fully and shook her head at him. "You knew. Somehow. I don't know how, but you just _did_ ," she accused him.

"If I had known for sure, I would have made sure you didn't even get one point," Kurt countered.

Kate drew herself up like she was going to argue with him before, after a moment, she just let out all her breath and shook her head at him. "Fine. But I want to confirm it with K before I start packing earmuffs."

"That's fine," Kurt said with a nod as Scott slipped into the kitchen and sat down by a mystified Annie, who was watching Kate and Kurt curiously.

"I'm going to need a debrief from you guys this morning while the details are still fresh," Scott said as he looked down the line of them. "Logan — if you want to start first, that would be great." He looked over to Kate and Kurt. "I'll only take a little bit with you guys — one at a time, if it's not too much of an imposition to split up."

Kate glared at him for a moment as Logan and K sat more upright and a few moments later, Logan followed Scott out of the room and K just made space to put her head down on the table. One of the bamfs popped over and tipped his head sideways and patted her head before he disappeared with her coffee mug only to reappear after he'd topped her off. He gave her another pat on the head and teleported over to the seat across from her at the table.

"So," Kate said cautiously. "Are you going to start wearing a ring?"

K just looked up at her for a moment and let out a sigh. "How. The hell. Did you hear so fast?"

"I have sources close to the situation," Kate said with a smirk, though she was clearly still a little wide-eyed and shocked. "For real, though? This isn't an elaborate prank?"

"I … would never participate in a prank like that," K said with a tired shake of her head. She looked over at the grin Kurt was wearing. "Close to the situation, huh?"

He just grinned wider at her and tapped his ear before he gave her a knowing wink.

"Eavesdropper then," K said.

"I'm not the least bit sorry," he said, the grin threatening to split his face before he got to his feet to pull her into a hug. "Congratulations."

She narrowed her eyes at him for a moment but shook her head and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Thanks? I guess."

"You guess?" Annie was also beaming. "Honey, that's fantastic news! Are you going to pick out a ring yourself? That's what Teresa did."

"No. No, I don't think so," K said easily.

"Well, I'm excited to see what he picks out for you, then," Annie said, still grinning as she got up to give K a hug too — stepping into the space that Kurt vacated only after he'd squeezed her one last time.

"Actually — that might be a popcorn moment. Watching him shop," K said to Kate with a roll of her eyes as she pulled Logan's flannel around her shoulders a little tighter.

"We could get Pete to narrate the whole thing," Kate suggested.

"Peter or Henry?"

"Depends on if you want an actual documentary or just lots of Logan chasing Pete off with the camera."

K snickered at that. "The second one for sure."

"That's what I thought." Kate grinned at her. "We'll have to set up a second camera to catch the terrified Pete when he inevitably gets too close."

"Okay that — that kinda cheered me up," K said. "Mental imagery is pure gold. The squeaks, Kate. _Squeaks_."

Kate saluted K with her coffee mug. "I'm already trying to decide what we can call the video. It's gotta be something about an endangered spider, I think."

"Absolutely," K agreed. "' _Endangered Arachnid with a Death Wish_ : _The Tragic End'_."

"Perfect. Print that and publish it. We're done here," Kate said with a grin and a two-fingered salute before she turned back to her coffee.


	5. Out of the Frying Pan and Into the Fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The news is out in the mansion - the ferals are engaged! But that's not the only news that's getting jaws to drop. Unfortunately, it might be a little more than our girls can handle. Thank goodness for timely distractions!

It hadn't taken long at all for word of Logan and K's engagement to spread, and when Noh and Jubilee got back from their space honeymoon, they wasted no time in getting in on the excitement. Jubilee just about had a fit before she flung her arms around Logan's neck to kiss his cheek and then do very nearly exactly the same thing to K.

As for Noh, he just very seriously told K that if she should require a lawyer after her wedding day, he would gladly return the favor before he broke into a grin and a laugh and spun her around in a hug.

But with the two of them back, it didn't take Annie long to point out that they should have their poolside "meeting" to prep for the next fall semester at the school now that everyone on staff was in one place, and nobody argued when it meant a grill-out and swimming, anyway.

Of course, there really wasn't much in the way of "planning" or "meeting" while they were out at the pool, not just because everyone was more interested in swimming or in teasing both the newly married and the newly engaged couples but because, honestly, they were just going to reuse the same curriculum that they had used the year before — and the year before, and the year before.

Still, as everyone was getting hot dogs or burgers, Annie insisted that there was at least one matter of business that she wanted to get cleared up, and she was so persistent about waiting until she had everyone's attention that eventually they just had to let her say her piece so they could go back to swimming in peace.

Annie made a little noise as she cleared her throat and looked over the group before she drew up her shoulders and _beamed_ at them all. "I'm going to need someone to take over my classes for a few weeks around January," she told them as Scott was _completely_ unable to hide the grin behind her. She rested a hand on her stomach with a little smile. "I just hope there's room in the mansion for a little one," she said, watching their reactions for a moment as the assembled group — sans the two ferals, who were looking smug from their pool chairs — went from total shock to excitement in the space of a few seconds.

After that first beat of stunned silence, there was, of course, a flurry of congratulations and hugs all around in celebration of what Kate was already calling the "mini boss."

"Do you have names picked out yet?" Peter asked curiously — one of the first to get there and wrap up the Summers family for himself.

Annie and Scott shared a look for a moment before Annie just nodded. "Yes we do," she said, though her smile only grew when it became obvious that she wasn't going to elaborate.

"Will you share with us, or is it too early?" Storm asked with an openly cheerful expression.

"We wanted to save that for when he or she makes the big debut," Scott admitted.

"Then we'll be forced to speculate and offer our suggestions," Storm replied, smiling warmly as she reached over to pull Scott into a long hug.

Annie laughed at that. "You can try, but we've already picked names out."

"Then perhaps this will just be suggestions for future occasions," she answered, still with that same, ever-growing smile.

"Like tiny little Kree," Kate whispered in Jubilee's ear with a troublemaking grin.

"Or itty bitty demons," Jubilee returned. "Ones that end up saying more than 'bamf'."

Kate shook her head. "You first, Jubes. You're a married woman. Unless you _want_ Kurt to get in trouble. He's a good Catholic, you know."

Jubilee rolled her eyes dramatically and pushed Kate's shoulder. "Is that going to be how this is going to go forever and ever? I have to do everything first?"

"You _are_ older," Kate pointed out.

"That's a fine point," Jubilee said, and though Kate looked triumphant for a moment, she burst into a laugh when she realized that Jubilee was making a show of looking around the poolside area. "Where is the _old lady,_ anyhow?"

Kate looked around as well for a moment and then shrugged. "Smarter than us," she said. "She heard about the baby glitter and got outta Dodge."

"Yeah, she's got evasion down to an art form alright," Jubilee muttered with a little frown.

"Well, you know how it is. You can only spring so much on a person. Proposal's plenty for a person to process," Kate said, shrugging.

Jubilee just shook her head. "She's not processing that at all. That … freakin' _sneaky_ ferals. Kitty will be so mad."

Kate pushed out her lower lip for a moment as she tipped her head to the side. "I thought Kitty _wanted_ them to get engaged?"

"She wants them to get _married._ "

"Yes, well — I hear you have to get engaged to do that," Kate pointed out.

"Except she nearly had a panic attack when I asked when the big day was." Jubilee crossed her arms, rolled her eyes, and looked annoyed in general. "Do the math."

Kate tipped her head further to the side as she studied Jubilee and then just let out a big breath. She knew she didn't have _any_ room to judge K when the fact that she was even _considering_ long-term plans with Kurt still scared the life out of her… But she also couldn't blame Jubilee for wanting Logan to be happy, all things considered. "Well," she said at last. "Baby steps, I guess. She said yes — setting the date is next."

"Yeah, but for her? That could be twenty years from now." Jubilee shook her head. "That ... she only agreed to slow him down. It's like a bookmark."

Kate thought about it for a moment and then broke into a wicked grin. "You're forgetting one thing, my dear Jubilee," she said as she motioned toward Kurt, who was in the middle of hugging Scott and congratulating him fervently. "The best man isn't going to wait forever. Or the officiant, whatever he decides to be."

"Yeah, well — that might have been Logan's way of slowing _him_ down too. Pick a role. Sneaky damn ferals, I'm telling you." Jubilee tipped her head to Kurt. "He could spin on that question forever. And Wolvie doesn't want to scare her off."

Kate had to laugh but Jubilee was absolutely, completely right about that. "I know. He's tragically adorable going back and forth on it. Last night, he was sure he wanted to officiate, but this morning, he was working on a best man speech in his head. It's just… so cute."

But Jubilee was still glaring toward where Logan and K had disappeared, apparently not much in the mood to talk about Kurt's wedding excitement. She was still glaring hard when Remy arrived at the pool with a little frown.

"Hate to go an' break up dis here gatherin', but it do seem we got a small problem dat needs addressin'," he said with his hands in his pockets. "One a' da kids from de school done got hisself in a bind."

"Sounds like something needs shooting," Kate said quickly. "And I need to shoot things. Where am I headed?"

"Oregon coastline," K said as she and Logan stepped out of the house just behind Remy. She shot Kate a little smirk. "Partner."

Remy chuckled and leaned over toward Kate. "Miss K already done beat ya to claimin' de mission," he said.

"Good thing she doesn't mind sharing," Kate said as she climbed out of the pool and called over her shoulder, "Don't worry, boss man, we'll bring the bird back all nice and dry. I'll try not to drip everywhere." She just laughed when Scott gave her a _look_ as she toweled off. "You coming, _Kobold_?"

Kurt just grinned at her and teleported over to where she was. "At your service, as always, _V_ _ö_ _gelchen_ ," he said as he raised her hand to his lips with an impish grin.

" _Prytt med kärlekfåglar_ ," K said with a smirk.

With the team picked out, Kate and Kurt teleported off together to quickly change out of their bathing suits and towel off — with the ever-helpful bamfs offering hair dryers, towels, washcloths, and so on — before they popped down to the blackbird, where Logan and K were already waiting for them.

"Getting away from the glitter," Kate said in a low tone to K that she was sure Kurt couldn't hear.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," K replied with a totally innocent expression.

"Right." Kate smirked at her for a moment and then looked to Logan. "You flying?"

"You can if you want," he offered. "Scott's not around to nit pick."

"You know that's an easy fix, right? Just threaten to crash him," Kate said with a grin as she slipped into the pilot's seat.

"He doesn't fight me when I fly," Logan said. "We went around a long time ago."

"Must be nice to have experience under your belt," Kate teased. "Only benefit of being old."

"Like he takes that into consideration," Logan said with a shake of his head.

She grinned at him. "Good thing I never listen to people being idiots," she said as she started up the takeoff procedures.

* * *

The coordinates Remy had given them took the little group along the coastline, and once they deplaned, Kate had to grin as she slid up beside Kurt, grabbed his hand, and said, "Turns out we didn't need to change out of our swimsuits."

"Except for the fact that this water is quite cold," Kurt pointed out, gesturing out at the waves over the rocky beach.

"Well, I heard that when you get cold, it's good to snuggle up with someone," she teased. "Might be an old wives' tale though."

At that, a slow grin spread over Kurt's face, and he chuckled. "Oh, in that case, we should finish this mission quickly and hurry for a swim before we head back." He shrugged. "Maybe let Logan fly on the way home. We can't leave the couple alone too long."

"I like the way you think," she agreed, resting her head on his arm as they walked along the coast toward the network of caves where the kid was supposed to be hiding from whatever trouble had caught him during his summer vacation.

"Who's going in?" Kurt asked as the other two came to a stop with them, already eyeing the outside of the caves, where there were still plenty of places to hide in all the pock-marked nooks and crannies — not to mention the dark caves themselves that still smelled a bit like high tide.

Kate tipped her head to the side for a moment. "Not a fan of dark, small places," she admitted before she broke into a little grin and looked over at K. "What say we make the boys take the slimy little caves?"

"Works for me," K said with a shrugged up shoulder. "And as long as they get back before the tide does, we'll be just fine." She was looking at the high water line in the rocks around them with a little frown.

"Kurt will 'port them out if it gets too close," Kate said. "I know how yours feels about water."

"It's the sinking aspect," K said. "Not very buoyant when you're solid muscle and metal."

The guys shot them a little look but headed into the caves all the same, with the bamfs trailing alongside them wielding purple flashlights. One of them made a big show of picking up his tail to keep it from getting in any of the wet, slimy coating on the ground, baring his teeth at the mossy stones.

Kurt called back to the girls just before they walked into one of the larger caves in a teasing tone: "Don't start the picnic without us!"

"Wouldn't dream of it!" Kate called back before she turned to K and gestured with one hand to the rocks and roots and trees. "Hope you don't mind climbing. I'm a fan of free climbing myself," she said, already grinning to herself as she climbed up a bit higher. "It's a great way to get away from people."

"Nope, don't mind at all. It's kind of relaxing," K agreed, taking to the craggy wall. "Then we can be all worn out and sweaty when the guys get back. It'll require a dip … possibly of the skinny variety."

"Betcha we find our missing student up here. Nobody wants to go in those musty caves anyway," Kate replied without looking over her shoulder, more focused on getting her next handhold than on seeing what kind of smirk her comment got from K.

The two of them continued their ascent up the wall in silence, both of them clearly enjoying their climb and content to just go up with their own thoughts, though when they reached the top, they weren't all that surprised to find that the rock-scattered cliff didn't seem to have any sign of the kid they were supposed to be looking for — or even any decent hiding spots. So it looked like their best shot at finding the student would, in fact, be the watery, dark caves.

"Guess we go back and check on the boys," Kate said with a sigh, and K just chuckled as the two of them made one last sweep of the clifftop before they looked back over the edge — though before either of them could start the descent, they were both assaulted from behind, rough hands grabbing their arms and clapped over their mouths.

* * *

The guys and bamfs searched the caves thoroughly, and after a while, Logan had to let out a little huff. "There isn't even an _old_ scent in here," he said as he turned to Kurt. "Why don't you see if the girls found anything worthwhile, I'm sure neither one of 'em could sit still to just wait."

Kurt chuckled to himself and hit the radio. "Ladies, we are going to guess you didn't start the fun without us, but have you seen any sign outside? Our search here is for naught." The two men shared a little smirk, sure that they'd get some kind of sassy response from either of the girls, but no answer came through the comms.

"I doubt that they didn't hear it," Logan said, already heading back the way they'd come with a deeply settling frown. "And they were in good moods when we left 'em. Unless…. You think the cave might be blocking the signal?"

"That may be the case," Kurt said quietly, tipping his head toward the cave entrance as he put a hand on Logan's shoulder ready to teleport them the rest of the way. "I'll keep trying, but let's head back quickly all the same."

Logan nodded his agreement, and a moment later, the two men were back at the entrance of the cave — their earlier good mood gone in an instant as they realized that not only were they not getting a response from the girls but that the caves themselves had gone completely quiet. They couldn't see a single one of the bamfs.

They had barely stepped outside into the light, when they were attacked from both sides by massive men with nets that sparked and popped when they made contact.

Kurt tried to teleport as soon as the first spark arced and snapped at his skin, but he found he was trapped, and as he looked over at Logan, he had to cringe as his friend had already blacked out from the sparks. When Kurt didn't go down right away himself, one of their abductors rushed cracked him on the back of the head, sending him into blackness as well.


	6. Episode I: The Damsels Are Not In Distress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We find the source of the problem - MOJOVISION!

_MojoVision is proud to present: The Amazing Nightcrawler and the Fearless Wolverine, making their return to MojoVision in a BRAND NEW season, filled with daring do and darling damsels in distress!_

_When last we saw our heroes, MojoVision provided, for your entertainment, an up-close view of the grudge match that is Sabretooth vs. Wolverine. Viewers will recall the heart-stopping horror when it was revealed this this time_ — _it's personal!_

 _The shocking plot twist that Wolverine has fallen in love left our viewers thirsty for more_ — _and not to be outdone, MojoVision has striven to ensure that not only these fierce lovers but also the valiant sidekicks_ — _Nightcrawler and his purple-clad new lady in love_ — _will get to show their stuff!_

 _When last we saw our heroes, they had defeated the fearsome Sabretooth, only to find that they were too late to save the lovely lady_ — _or were they? Yes, that's right, ladies and gentlemen and aliens of all ages, this brunette wonder is heartier than she looks!_

_The shock! A broken neck was remedied, and love did, in fact, win out!_

_It seems romance is in the air for Wolverine's best friend as well. Our viewers will remember the debonair swordsman's touching and gentlemanly exit with his own mysterious archer_ — _yes, guys and girls, everyone's favorite blue X-Man has fallen for the one and only prodigy of the great Avenger Hawkeye._

 _This new season of "The Amazing Nightcrawler and the Fearless Wolverine" features all the twists and turns and heart-pounding excitement that our viewers have come to expect_ — _along with the touching romance to span the ages. Literally!_

_Without any further ado, we present to you the first episode for your delectation and delight: "Damsels in Distress!"_

* * *

When K woke up, she had to narrow her eyes as she looked around her. Nothing was familiar, but she didn't _think_ she'd been hurt. She shifted a bit and froze when she felt the movement of fabric that she had _not_ been wearing when she left before she looked down at herself and sat up quickly.

"Kate?" she called out as she took in her appearance. Tight bodice, big skirt, and it looked to her, as she glanced around the bed she was on and the room she was in, that they were trapped in some stupid story book. Stone castle walls, four-poster beds, long banners as decorations — and a definitely authentic, musty smell.

Not to mention the rose petals on the bed and floor….

When she got to a mirror, she let out a string of expletives that would make a sailor blush. "I'm not an effing princess," K said through clenched teeth as she took in the very medieval blue and silver dress and upswept hair that was clearly nothing she would have ever chosen for herself.

She looked across the room and just had to shake her head in irritation when she spotted Kate on the other four-poster in the room, laid out in the classic sleeping princess pose with rose petals in her spread-out hair and her hands resting on her middle. "At least they got her color right," K muttered, frowning at the purple bodice and dress as she rushed over to wake her up.

"Kate, come on, I'm not kissing you," K said as she gently shook her arm. "Come on."

Kate groaned softly and blearily pushed K's arm away as she sat up and looked around, though she woke up fast when she saw what K was wearing. "Why. The heck. Are you wearing that?"

"Do you honestly think that I would wear this? On purpose?" K asked as she gestured to the bodice. "I'm not .. no."

Kate just stared at her friend for a moment and then looked down at her own purple-laced dress and bared her teeth at it. "Whoever put me in this is going to lose their hands," she said, the distaste dropping from every word as she picked up some of the fabric of the skirt to glare at it.

"No kidding," K replied. "You know there was a lot of uninvited _touching._ "

Kate looked down at the busty contraption and glared harder. "Gonna have the eyes that snuck peeks too. You and I are going to be busy," she said as she threw her legs over the side of the rose-covered bed and picked a few flowers out of her hair with a few whispered _what the futz_ 's the more she discovered of their surroundings.

"Careful with the shoes, they're not … normal," K pointed out before Kate could get to her feet.

Kate picked up the hem of her dress and swore very loudly. "I'm not wearing these," she said as she pried the offending high-heeled shoes off. "I am _not_ wearing glass slippers."

"At least we have both of them," K teased.

"If we hadn't, and whoever's behind this gave the second slipper to anyone but Kurt, we'd be having _words,_ " Kate said with a little smirk. "Well, not so much words as arrows, but you get the idea." She tossed the slippers onto the bed before she looked around the room, taking in the stone walls and heavy wooden door as well as the windows that were _definitely_ too thin for them to slip through. "Alright. Let's blow this medieval popsicle stand."

"Yes, please," K replied, offering Kate a hand up.

When they got to the door, naturally it was locked, and K looked at the side of it with a frown. "Hinges are on the outside. You know what that means, right?" She was pulling up her skirt as she took a few steps backward.

"I love breaking down doors," Kate said with a brilliant grin. "And it's gonna feel so cathartic breaking stuff," she added as she picked yet another petal out of her hair.

"Let me try first. If I can't kick it down, there will be things to be cut first, and I don't want you breaking your dainty princess foot." With that, K took a few quick steps forward to leap up and kick the door right at the knob. It swung forward with a heavy clang that rattled a few sculptures outside to the ground. K swept into a dramatic curtsey. "After you, Hawkeye."

Kate smirked and curtseyed, "Why thank you, Lady K," she said before she led the way down the winding stairs. Apparently, they'd been at the top of a pretty steep tower — which somehow was a surprise to neither of them but was still frustrating, considering the long climb back down that they were forced to do.

Kate did take the time to peer through one of the thin windows, only about as wide as her hand, to see if she could gauge where they were, though that wasn't actually helpful. As far as she could tell, this was exactly what it seemed to be from the inside — a Medieval-style castle, with fields beyond the walls and nothing that looked even remotely modern, at least as far as she could see.

 _So we probably won't be able to call anybody,_ she thought, frowning at the situation before she shook her head and rushed to catch up to K.

As they worked their way down the long staircase, tucking and tying their skirts around their legs so they could move more easily, they thought they could hear a low sort of rumbling, though they weren't concerned just yet. It sounded sort of like machinery — which could actually help them, really.

"Remind me to tell you about my last escape from a castle tower," Kate said quietly to K. "Sad to say, this is not my first time. Though that time I was wearing Kurt's shirt, not this… thing," she added, making a face at the dress.

"I think I'd prefer the guy's shirt myself," K agreed. "Remind me later how to show you how to turn a button down shirt into a temporary dress. Saves hassles and avoids the walk of shame."

"I think we're way past that point anyway," Kate laughed.

"In this outfit. Oh … for sure," K deadpanned. "Well beyond shameful."

They continued on down the stone steps as carefully and quietly as the mass of fabric they were wearing would allow, and by Kate's estimation, they were nearly at the bottom of the tower when something distinctly _not_ mechanical let out a deafening roar.

"That … _bullshit_ ," K said as she stared at Kate.

Kate nodded her agreement but couldn't even think of anything witty to say for several long seconds as she glanced around the walls for something to use. Finally, she spotted a coat of arms and broke into a grin. "Feel like slaying a dragon, Lady K?" she asked as she pulled the sworn from the suit of armor at the bottom of the stairs— it wasn't ideal, but she could use it. "Or whatever the heck that is down there?"

* * *

When Kurt began to stir awake, he was surprised at how _heavy_ his arms felt as he tried to push himself upright, still a bit bleary-eyed as he went to take in his surroundings — and simply had to stare for a moment at the sight of the metal armor around his arm as he did so.

Blinking hard, he quickly took stock of himself to find that he was in full knight's armor — even his tail was coated in chain maille — and that he and Logan, who was similarly dressed, seemed to be lying outside a stable, where two well-decorated horses were being kept. Based on the deep blue decorations on one and the light yellow on the other, Kurt was sure they had been placed there on purpose.

He jumped to his feet — or tried to. A sudden stop and hard pull on his left arm drew his attention to the fact that moving would be a little more difficult with 300 pounds of Logan attached to that arm, and he sank back down to a sitting position to try and shake his friend awake. "Logan, _mein Freund_ , wake up," he said as he kept half an eye on his friend and the rest of his attention on the energy restraint between their hands that were keeping them together. It was light enough that he hadn't immediately noticed it, but the energy itself was crackling and bright.

As soon as Logan had cracked half an eye open, Kurt smiled at him and couldn't resist: "We're not in Kansas anymore, Wolverine."

"Elf, I'm not in the mood for this. My head's killin' me," Logan said, but when he moved his arm, he looked down at the armor and groaned. "What the flamin' hell is this all about?"

"I don't know yet, but I'm sure we'll find out soon enough," Kurt said, offering Logan his other hand to get to their feet.

Logan shook his head as he looked at his best friend. "Not too many people would try and pull this stunt," he said.

"Yes, well, perhaps we can figure out the 'who' after we get our bearings more properly," Kurt said, looking around the stable with a small frown.

Logan narrowed his eyes and looked beyond the stable, clearly scenting the place. "So ... where are the girls?"

Kurt shook his head. "I haven't seen either of them yet," he admitted. "But if they've been taken as well, I'm sure they're just as displeased with their situation as we are."

"Let's get moving, I wouldn't want to be the guy that did this when they figure it out." He shot Kurt a little smirk. "What do you think they've got them in?"

"That depends entirely on the role they're supposed to play," Kurt said with a bit of a sigh. "What do you think the chances are they have their own armor and weapons?" he asked, some of the teasing showing through with a light smirk.

"I wouldn't bet on that one, somehow," Logan chuckled. "I've got the distinct feeling they're not going to be pleased."

"I can already hear Kate's argument that her skill set is perfectly suited to this environment," Kurt couldn't help but chuckle.

"K too," Logan nodded, gesturing to the horses. "Don't mean it'll be used right though."

Kurt had to laugh quietly as the two of them stepped around the stables into a more open field, where they could see the big, obvious castle just on the horizon like a neon sign as to where the girl were. Kurt was just about to turn to Logan and ask him how he felt about rescuing princesses when there was a rumbling roar that shook the ground even from this distance, and his eyes widened as he looked to his friend.

"Well, _mein Freund_ , I think our princesses are being kept by a dragon," Kurt said, both eyebrows high on his head.

"Ya think?" he muttered before shaking his head. "Oh, they are going to be so thrilled with this," Logan said like a curse under his breath. He looked Kurt's way with a smirk. "So, we riding or usin' alternative transportation?"

Kurt picked up the hand that was still attached to Logan's. "I think, for the sake of simplicity, let's _not_ try to ride in this state," he said with a nod before he teleported them both to the castle in an instant.

They reappeared just outside the doors, and Logan looked over to Kurt with a raised eyebrow for just a moment before he simply cut them an entrance through the large wooden door — though when they stepped through, both of them had to pause and just… laugh as they took in what the girls were doing.

Both of the girls were wearing the most ridiculous dresses, low cut and frilly, but they'd taken the skirts and wrapped them around their legs, tying the ends up at the waist so they could move around better. Kate had taken a sword from a decoration somewhere, as well as a shield from a suit of armor, and she was advancing toward a huge dragon, dancing around it and getting closer and closer.

K didn't have a sword, but when the large, red dragon that was at least the size of the banquet hall they were in roared at her, it seemed K lost her temper. "You. Don't. Yell. At me!" K shouted back, baring her teeth at the dragon and running in under its neck to sink her hands into its sides, and where she pulled her hands back, there were three obvious holes.

Kurt glanced over at Logan, who looked almost amused as the two girls took turns putting holes in the dragon — who despite its size, didn't seem to have quite the speed to keep up with the two of them at once. He reached for the sword at his hip that had apparently come with the armor and drew it with a little grin. "Well, shall we join the fun?" he asked.

Logan simply tipped his head at the dragon for a moment before the two friends took off at a run toward the big red beast.

"Oh look, K, it's our knights in shining armor," Kate said dryly as she popped back up from the ground after rolling away from a torrent of fire that would at least have caught all that lace up in flames. "Even came with the aluminum foil."

"Tasty little hot pockets," K agreed. "Ready for roasting."

The dragon roared again, this time in obvious frustration as it snapped at K, who just sidestepped out of the way of the long teeth before Kate stuck her sword in its eye while it was down close enough for her to reach, which just got another loud roar and a plume of fire that had both girls putting out embers on their lace dresses.

"Fire hazard, these things," Kate muttered.

K nodded before she ran forward again and started to climb up on the creature, using what she could to get onto its back. "Like rock climbing with stabbing at the end," she called down to Kate as she started to shimmy up its neck.

"Best kind of rock climbing, I'd say," Kate replied as she slipped around the dragon, drawing its attention even as she made her way closer to the boys, who were just doing as much damage to its sides as they could while it tried to shake off K.

It took some work, but between head shakes, K shimmied up to its head, and before it could try anything too smart, she simply sunk her claws into the back of its skull, mid roar. In a final show of defiance, the dragon whipped its head to the side, dropping K flat on her back as it reared up to go over.

With a familiar-sounding _bamf_ , both of the boys arrived, and Kurt put a hand on her arm to teleport her out of the way of the dragon before it fell over with a shudder that shook the castle to its very foundation — with all four of them well out of its path.

Kate came up to join the three of them, flipping the sword in her hand with a sooty grin. "How are you both not, like, in little ovens in there? That _can't_ be comfortable," she teased as she slipped over to snag Kurt around the waist and made a show of hissing at the hot metal when she touched him.

"You avoid the flames," Kurt replied before he gave her a grin. "And what about you two? It looks as though you got blood on your pretty dresses."

"Bite me," K half snarled as Logan steadied her, holding her closely — still dizzy from the 'port.

Kate chuckled at her friend and then looked Kurt over with a widening grin, in a much better mood now that the boys were back and the dragon wasn't an issue. "I like the tail," she said, gesturing to the mesh-covered tail behind him. "You get all your armor custom-made, Sir Nightcrawler?"

"Apparently so," Kurt said as he spotted a camera, a glint of metal in all the smoke, in the far corner of the room. "And ... I know where we are too." He gestured with the mesh-covered tail toward the hovering camera. "Mojo."

"Explains the stupid outfits and the dumb, overplayed scenario," Logan agreed.

Kate followed their gaze and frowned when she saw the free-floating little device. "So how do we—"

But before Kate could finish the question, there was a _loud_ hiss as part of the castle just seemed to open up and gas poured in on the group of them from all sides. As Kate's vision started to blur, she felt Kurt's arms and tail both wrap around her, and she saw for just a second that Logan was trying to hold onto K as well before she simply blacked out, with the others not far behind.


	7. Episode II: Dread Pirate Blue Tail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mojo-vision returns with the second installment of highly entertaining torture!

_Welcome back to MojoVision's "The Amazing Nightcrawler and the Fearless Wolverine"! This season promised our viewers the chance for a love story and adventures to span the ages, and it's certainly been that so far!_

_Our last episode saw our intrepid heroes face down a dragon_ — _yes, a dragon!_ — _in defense of their lovely ladies, who turned out to be dazzlingly resourceful all on their own. That's right, viewers. Those of you who saw our previous episode know that the mysterious K and the intrepid Hawkeye can certainly handle themselves!_

_Our daring heroes arrived just in time to aid their lovely ladies in the desperate bid to escape the clutches of a fiery death, but will that be the case this time?_

_In the second episode of our riveting installment, our heroes leave the safety of dry land and the homey comforts of Earth's Middle Ages and trade it in for something a little more dangerous_ — _and with foes who also know how to handle a blade!_

* * *

When Kurt woke up again, he thought for a moment he might still be dizzy from whatever the gas had been, as it felt like the ground was pitching and rolling — until he was awake enough to recognize both the motion and the scent of the waves. His head popped up in surprise as he looked around their new surroundings.

He recognized the design of a good 17th-century pirate ship immediately, of course — and the clothes he was wearing weren't that far from what he'd worn at the Halloween party two years back, with a long coat and a hat to match.

Logan, on the other hand, didn't have the same long coat, but he did have an open-chested shirt and slops — and he looked completely unamused, having clearly woken up ahead of Kurt with enough time to take in their surroundings and decide he was _done_ with them already.

Kurt took the hand that Logan offered to get to his feet and then sighed as he looked around the ship. "I don't suppose the girls are on the ship with us?" he asked, though he was sure he already knew the answer, since they seemed to be the only two around.

"When has it ever been that easy?" Logan asked, glaring out at the ocean around them.

Kurt let out a sigh and then shrugged. "I can always hope," he replied, looking around once more, this time out to sea to follow Logan's gaze. He couldn't see any sign of a ship on the horizon, and he let out another, longer sigh. "Do you suppose we should look for a treasure map? X marks the girls?" As he spoke, the two of them poked around their assigned ship, if nothing else just to make sure there were no surprises waiting for them. But thus far, there was no map — or any kind of navigational gear to tell them where they were.

"I wouldn't be against finding that for our treasure," Logan muttered with a little smirk.

Kurt let out a sigh and leaned back. "I'm leery of just picking a direction," he muttered. "We'll start a spiral search, _ja_?"

"I guess if the wind will cooperate," Logan said looking up at the mast — thankfully, the sea and winds were calm, but Logan was right; they didn't have that guarantee, especially not when Mojo was involved. "Not like we can do much just the two of us when we're stuck together." He picked up the arm they were connected with.

Kurt let out a small smirk. "I think I'll take the wheel, _mein Freund_." He gestured at himself. "I am the captain, after all."

* * *

When Kate woke up again, the first thing she thought was that wherever she was, it was _not_ a rose-covered four poster bed in a castle somewhere. Even though, wow, did it feel like a similar costume, what with the super tight corset.

It was damp and musty, and the way the ground was moving underneath her probably meant a ship — at least, she hoped it was a ship and not an earthquake or something equally horrible — and when she sat up to take it in, she wasn't all that surprised to see the bars and the wood and rigging of a brig in a pirate ship, like something out of _Treasure Island_.

K was still out beside her, though her outfit wasn't nearly so corset-y. More… barmaid. Kate's had plenty of fabric and way too much squeezing going on — K's left very little to the imagination, especially from the front — and Kate couldn't help but wonder if it was some kind of punishment, considering K had been the one to fell the dragon...

As Kate moved to wake her, she finally noticed the energy restraints connecting her right hand and K's left, and she frowned hard, recognizing it as the same sort of thing Logan and Kurt had. "K," she muttered quietly as she shook her friend awake. "K, they dressed us up again."

"What?" K asked as she started to wake up a bit, though she frowned when she felt a distinct lack of fabric on her legs. "Where are we now? And — _this is not a damn dress. Nothing is covered!_ "

"Yeah, I was gonna complain about the lack of oxygen, but I'm gonna keep mine, thanks," Kate said with the slightest of smirks. She gestured with her free hand at the brig. "Welcome to… um. The _Black Pearl_ , looks like."

"No freakin' way am I waiting around for anyone," K said as she got to her feet and tried to tug at the hem of the 'dress', though she abandoned that when it looked like it might expose more up top. "I swear to God I'm going to skin whoever it was that put me in this … _shirt_."

"Then let's commandeer a ship and go rescue our boys," Kate suggested.

"Sounds about par for the course to me," K replied. She didn't wait for Kate to offer a suggestion before she popped a claw and simply sliced through the door, kicking open the bars that groaned and moaned as they scraped their way open.

"Think you could do the same on the corset?" Kate asked, gesturing at her own getup, which was still way too tight and awkward to move in, especially with one arm shackled to K. "I mean. I know I've got great curves. But I'd like to be able to swing a sword," she added, illustrating her point by trying — and failing — to twist.

"Don't move," K told her before she threaded the claw behind the laces and just gave a tiny pull to pop it open. "You're welcome."

"My hero," Kate smirked, twisting around and taking exaggerated deep breaths that weren't actually that exaggerated — what was it with show people and _tight_ clothes? Even her costume was breathable when it hugged her.

Once she had her breath back, though Kate was already poking her head out of their little cell to see if there was anything she could use — seeing as she had a distinct lack of claws. "And for our next trick, we'll make one of the bad guys' swords magically appear in my hand," she said when it was clear there wasn't anything just… lying around. "Upstairs?" She tipped her head at the ladder, where they could see daylight from the upper deck.

"Do you care if it comes to you with blood on it already?" K asked with a little smirk.

"I thought they all came that way," Kate said dryly as they headed up the ladder. "You mean there's shiny new ones?"

"I've heard as much, but it's probably a vicious lie," K said before she gestured ahead of them. "Pick your previously used sword, Hawkeye."

Kate looked down at her friend and just had to grin as an idea occurred to her. "We'll steal one from the first moron who says anything about your dress."

"That sounds reasonable enough. If you can qualify this as a dress," K said with a nod as she led the way up the stairs.

"Shirt, then," Kate agreed as they stepped onto deck, unimpeded even as they stood fully in the bright light, though the sea breeze had K in even more of a foul mindset — all things considered wardrobe-wise.

It looked to be a fully-crewed pirate ship, complete with a captain across the deck, who was standing with his hands behind his back and an actual parrot on his shoulder. There were men in knee breeches, only half of them wearing full shirts, going up and down the rigging or even scrubbing the deck in a few cases.

"This place smells like scurvy and delicate male egos," K said quietly to Kate.

"If I could find something to throw, I think I could hit the parrot off his shoulder. That thing doesn't even look real," Kate whispered back.

"Cheap knockoff, I'm sure," K said. "Though … that's real saltwater, and I think we're stuck."

"No swimming for it, got it," Kate said, looking down at the restraints between the two of them even as the pirate captain caught their gazes and broke into a bit of a grin as he strode over toward them.

"I see ye've grown tired of your accommodations. Perhaps we ken find something a bit more suitable fer such fine and delicate treasures as yerselves." The captain stopped in front of them with a leering grin that had K just growling at him.

"Take another step, and you're gonna lose something fine and delicate," Kate said low, glaring just as hard as her friend.

The captain's leering grin just seemed to get wider as he purposely took a step in. "Ye've got bite for such prettily decorated jewels," he said, though that just seemed to get the gears in K's head turning.

"You have no idea, jackass. Kate, we don't kill this one right away," K said finally, with a wicked smirk starting up. "He needs to check for barnacles on the bottom of our ship the hard way." She looked at Kate for an instant. "Does that ... _count_ as something against my … outfit?"

"Close enough," Kate replied, already crouching the slightest bit to burst forward as soon as K was ready.

K nodded and popped her claws to lop off the captain's hand nearest to her and then rush the guy, knocking him backward so she could grab the hilt of the sword as it fell. "I'm going to keelhaul this half-rate pirate. Don't kill him, Hawkeye. If we've gotta pirate — _let's pirate_."

Kate gratefully took the sword — grimacing at the hand that had to be removed first but keeping her lunch to herself, thankfully — and flipped it experimentally in her hand, glad she'd been studying the dual wield with Kurt. After all, her dominant hand was of _course_ the one that was tied to her friend's. Of course it was. She tried out the balance, decided it would do in a pinch, and then she nodded, gesturing with her sword hand as the rest of the pirates moved to rush toward the girls in defense of their captain. "Whatever you say, Captain K," she said.

* * *

It wasn't an easy task trying to sail just the two of them, especially not stuck together as they were, but as Logan and Kurt discovered, they shouldn't have even bothered. A ship flying the familiar Jolly Roger seemed to be headed right for them after only half an hour or so of their best sailing efforts — and at a much faster pace than their ship could match even if they had been able to work it properly and unrestrained.

In a moment of frustration, Logan popped a claw and tried to stick it between his wrist and the shackle on his arm but as soon as he did, it hit him with an electrical shock that took him to his knees. "So that won't work," Logan said as Kurt helped him to his feet a few moments later once he'd started to get his bearings again. "Figures."

"I doubt it would be so easy," Kurt agreed as he looked toward the steadily approaching ship. He narrowed his eyes first at the flag and then at the restraint between him and Logan before he let out a sigh and seemed to take a moment to rearrange his shoulders and put his free hand on the sword Mojo had at least left him. "What do you think — do you feel like killing pirates today?"

"Don't think I have anything more pressin' on my schedule," Logan said with a nod.

Kurt had just drawn the gold-handled sword and was ready to 'port them over to get the drop on the pirates before they could be boarded … when he paused. "Something… is wrong," he said softly as he saw the way the ship was moving. As he watched, the mast of the ship approaching them seemed to sway unsteadily for a moment before it simply went crashing down onto the deck of the pirate ship.

"Looks like the girls got started without us," Logan said, chuckling to himself since clearly, again, Mojo had underestimated them.

"They are impatient," Kurt agreed, grinning for a moment as he shook his head. Of course the girls had found trouble. He put one hand on Logan's shoulder, not bothering to hide the chuckle as they could now hear the pirates shouting as the ship drew closer, before he simply teleported them both over to the other ship.

They were not surprised in the least to see the two girls fending off a small mass of pirates. Kate had a sword again, and she was fighting back to back with K, who was all snarls as she put slashes and holes in anyone who got too close to either of them.

When Logan saw how they'd had K dressed, he just laughed. "Well, at least we know why they're dying left and right."

At that, the girls seemed to notice that their men had arrived, and Kate grinned over at them, brushing back the hair that was plastered to her forehead with sweat with the back of her sword hand. "Hey, Captain K, look who decided to drop in at last."

"Yep, The Dread Pirate Blue Tail and his trusty sidekick," K called out as she cut off a pirate's hand. "Kinda cute."

"Hey. I like the dress," Logan called back. She just glared at him for a moment before Kurt shook his head with a laugh.

"We should join in before all the pirates are killed," Kurt said, though he didn't get far before K caught his attention with a request —

"Catch the captain, but don't kill him. I have _ideas._ "

"She's giving us orders," Kurt said to Logan, not bothering to conceal the chuckle.

"I'm alright with followin' em," Logan laughed.

"Oh, haven't you been introduced?" Kate was grinning ear to ear as she cut through another pirate. "This is Captain K. I'm her trusty parrot, Hawkeye. You can be first mate, Pirate Blue Tail. Logan… I dunno. You're hoisting the main sails or something."

Kurt grinned widely at them both. "I accept your terms!" he called out to Kate, jumping into the fray with no small amount of delight, all things considered — this was his element, after all. It was no time at all before he and Logan cut their way across the deck, blades and claws flashing until they found the captain, who was conspicuously missing his sword hand and not-so-conspicuously trying to hide.

"Which one did he tick off, do you suppose?" Logan asked, his eyes narrowed.

"Possibly both of them," Kurt said, matching Logan's expression as the man scrambled back from them, thinking back to the sword Kate had and its overly elaborate hilt. "My only question is whether their aim was the sword itself or the hand in particular."

With that, the guys dove in — much the same as the girls had, though the girls had already thinned the ranks substantially, so that there were few pirates left to guard their leader. The captain took one look at the two X-Men headed his way and rushed for the hatch to go below deck.

Logan and Kurt shared a look and followed after him in a rush — but once they were sub-level, they were swarmed by more pirates. The fight was fierce, considering the fact that the ranks of pirates were thinned, but Logan and Kurt were hampered by being strung together. Kurt was dodging and striking as Logan sliced and stabbed — a near perfect mimic of what the girls were doing top deck, though none of these pirates were stupid enough to try to grab at them as they had been doing with the girls.

"You wonder why half of 'em were missing hands?" Logan asked.

"I did see the outfits the girls were wearing," Kurt said mildly. "And half of them had gouges in their eyes as well." He grinned at his friend brilliantly as he drove his sword through the chest of an approaching pirate. "Perhaps if there were more women pirates in this crew, they would be interested in you, _mein Freund_. You wear the look well."

"And have our girls focused on making those poor lady sea dogs suffer. Inhumane," Logan deadpanned while the two of them worked on cutting their way through the crew. "How 'bout we just 'port up, I'll bet the captain already made it top deck."

Kurt just nodded his agreement, and an instant later, the two of them were back on the deck, glancing around to find that, yes, the captain had made it up, but he apparently hadn't gotten far, as Kate was just finishing up tying his arms behind him at the elbows.

"Hey, Parrot, our trusty crew finally got their lovely asses in gear," K said dryly when she saw the two of them appear in the blueish smoke. "Boys — you wanna finish the keelhaul?"

Kurt had to chuckle as he shook his head at the two girls before he saluted them with his sword. "Aye, aye."

He and Logan worked fast to secure the long rope to the pirate captain, all while the girls leaned against the fallen mast and caught their breath — and called out a few snarky comments on the outfits the boys were wearing.

"Didn't take long for them to take over the whole damn boat, did it?" Logan said before they simply pitched the captain overboard to let the boat do the rest of the work. "Hate to think what they'd do to us if we didn't listen quick enough." He shot K a little smirk that she answered by blowing a kiss before both girls broke down into a laugh as the guys came closer to them.

"We'd throw you overboard, but one of you would just pop right back on deck," Kate teased, grinning Kurt's way.

"Then you'd both be wet and grumpy," K agreed.

Kate giggled, looked K right in the face and said, with her most straight-faced expression. "Awk. Wet and grumpy,", which got the most beautiful _look_ from K that before Kate burst into laughter.

Kurt was grinning as he reached over with his free hand to take Kate's and raise it to his lips. "Then it's a good thing you have such a loyal crew, it seems," he said as Kate gave him the most impish grin she could, stepping in as close as it was possible to get without making things difficult for the other two — who were also trying to have their own sort of reunion, though they weren't taking time for the banter.

The guys were both pulling their girls closer when the boat shuddered. "What the hell is even going on? We _won._ We should be getting out of here," K grumbled as the guys again held on tightly, though when the boat very clearly started to take on water it was apparent that they weren't going to be getting to stick together at all.

"Right? What kind of pirate adventure doesn't end with at least some kind of treasure — like, I dunno, breathable clothing?" Kate grumbled.

"Or … clothing _at all,_ " K pointed out as the water covered her knees and they made their way toward the railing. "Why are we here? This is so stupid with the dumb outfits and … I swear to _God_ if I find out there are naked pictures circulating … wherever, someone is going to die slow."

Kurt gestured with the tip of his tail at a floating camera nearby. "His name is Mojo — and believe me, the explanation is just as stupid as you'd expect. He runs an… _entertainment_ empire." Kurt's face was twisted with obvious disdain.

K just stared back at him for a moment, trying to again get a better grip on Logan. "You're kidding, right?"

"Honestly, I wish I was." Kurt looked at her for a moment. "But it's not just for show — he uses _real_ danger, so don't think it's all just set pieces and magician's tricks," he advised before the ship rocked again and very nearly washed them overboard.

"So this is just going to keep happening?" K asked, glancing between the two men.

"Only until we can track him down and make him stop," Kurt said, grasping the railing once more.

K looked at Kate. "We should steal our kisses while we can, Squawkeye."

"Well, we _are_ pirates. We should definitely steal _something_ ," Kate agreed before she just reached over to snag Kurt around the waist for a quick kiss before anything else could happen.

K didn't get to do the same to Logan as he handled it for her, just before the ship scuttled completely and they found themselves forced to tread water as the seas began to rise up more, the weather taking a sudden turn that definitely couldn't have been natural.

The skies darkened, and the waves began to push them apart, though there was no way to see land — or even, after a moment, where the ship had once been. And it was no time at all before the guys were separated from their girls, simply because of the waves and the pull of the current, not to mention the tiring work of keeping themselves afloat in the first place.

They started out strong enough, but as the chop got thicker, and waves began to crash over their heads, Logan wore down faster than he'd have liked — buoyancy was an issue. It wasn't too long before Kurt was trying valiantly to keep his friend's head above water, even teleporting above the waves a few times to try to see land — or anything else they could use.

In the dark, crashing waves, Kurt managed to find a hunk of floating wood, and he then got them both holding onto it, though it was still halfway like drowning. The last thing either of them could see or hear in the darkness over the waves before they passed out on the flotsam was an old bell ringing in the distance.


	8. Episode III: Actually In Distress Damsels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another Episode of Mojovision - another daring rescue, but this time, the girls aren't the ones to do the dirty work!

_Welcome back to MojoVision's "The Amazing Nightcrawler and the Fearless Wolverine!" This season promised to be an epic struggle for love to conquer all, and our viewers so far have been shocked and riveted to their screens at the dangers we have provided this far!_

_In our last episode, we saw our valiant heroes battling the seas themselves in order to get to their warrior women in a race to find them before they were carried off by pirates!_

_Not to be deterred, the ever-surprising teamup of K and Hawkeye battled their captors themselves, revealing a surprising amount in the process!_

_Our last episode had swordfights and heroics, as well as one of the more gruesome fates that has ever befallen a pirate on this show. Looks like you don't want to make K mad, folks!_

_And on the other hand, what a passionate reunion! Who could forget the romance, the true love's kiss that won the day when our heroes were reunited at last? It was a moment to remember, made all the more beautiful by their tragic separation on a doomed, sinking ship!_

_Our third episode of the season takes our daring heroes to a new destination, this time away from the crashing waves and toward a more arid climate. The past few episodes, the gorgeous girls have been able to overcome the obstacles thrown at them, but this time, there are a few curve balls that we've thrown into the mix._

_Will K and Hawkeye have what it takes to find the loves of their lives? Will our heroes be able to fight through the newest abductors of their hearts desires? Find out in this next exciting episode!_

* * *

K did not want to open her eyes, especially because, as her hearing came back, she could hear Kate insisting that this was the very _worst_ costume yet. She just didn't want to see, and as it was, she was pretty sure she knew what it was from how little felt covered and the fact that the most overwhelming scent in the air was the heavy, thick note of cajeput. "I don't even want to know, Kate. Don't tell me details. Just tell me you're in purple and we're fine, I'm sure. Maybe this time we can just let the boys do all the work. The healing is starting to wear on me."

"Um. Yes on the purple. But I think there's some food if you'll get up. I'm kind of starving, even if I'm nine kinds of sore," Kate said, still trying to pull K to her feet.

"Have you ever read the story of Persephone?" K asked.

"Yeah, but this — this is not Ancient Greece," Kate said with a sigh. "C'mon, K, please. I'm a squishy human who needs food and water."

She groaned a bit, and when she opened her eyes, she just stared at Kate. "Please, no. Is this … punishment for being better pirates than they could handle?"

Kate gave K a rueful smile as she rubbed the back of her neck, wearing an outfit that was, in fact, purple but didn't cover much. Well — technically, there was fabric that covered her legs and arms, but K could still _see_ through it, and there was still somehow a bare midriff, with more opaque fabric around the important bits, but not much else…

Kate tipped her head K's way. "I like the earring," she said.

"And the rest of it …" K let her statement fall as she looked down at herself. "Why do I have bracelets and you don't?"

"I vote we don't find out the answer to that," Kate said as she pulled K to her feet and gestured at the space between them — and the distinct lack of any energy restraint. "At least this time we're not attached at the hip."

"And we're back to matching," K said. "Though … I disapprove of the color."

"What, pink's not your thing?" Kate asked as she made her way around the cushions to look for something safe to eat.

"Not particularly, no," K said in disgust.

Kate came back with some water a few moments later that she handed to K. "Persephone's got me paranoid. Any poison in there?" she asked, holding two clay decorated cups.

K took a tentative sniff and shook her head gently. "I don't _think_ so. I can't smell much of anything beyond the incense and perfumes, though, to be frank."

"Hey, we're letting the boys handle this one, remember? Might as well gear up for when we kick Mojo's sorry butt later," Kate pointed out as she downed the water. "Doubt it would do much for his ratings if we died of starvation or dehydration anyway, and I'm pretty sure I swallowed, like, a gallon of seawater in that storm."

"So what's the plan?" K asked. "Just … sit here and be pretty?"

"You could always tell a thousand stories," Kate pointed out, pouring herself another cup, which she downed as quickly as the first.

"Of every dumb sonofabitch that crossed me crooked?"

"And how you enacted your revenge, yeah," Kate agreed. "Get him nice and scared for when we show up."

"Oh, but I'm just a harmless little harem girl, apparently."

"And pretty," Kate said helpfully. "Helpless and pretty."

K frowned and finally got up to look around the place. When she got to the tall, heavy doors that were closing them inside, she rattled them and shook her head before she tried to pop her claws and let out a pained noise and shook her hand out hard from the shock the bracelets had given her. "No claws allowed, apparently."

Kate was wearing a frown of her own as she watched K. "Well now we know what the bracelets were for."

"That doesn't mean we're stuck though," K pointed out. "There has to be something in here other than pillows and figs."

Kate nodded as she continued her search of the room, all but disappearing behind some of the cushions as only her legs were visible for a moment, determined to find hidden cameras to smash as well as anything useful. "After we escape this place, let's raid a market and get something non-Persephone to eat. Maybe we'll even feed the boys."

"Half starving to death and we have nothing but figs and dates; whoever concocted this scenario is just ...stupid."

Kate smirked. "Well if they let us have any cutlery, that's it. We win. Too easy. And heaven forbid we have any _advantages_ here — considering we keep winning."

"Wonder if they'll bring us a burger if we feed each other."

"And fries and a milkshake," Kate agreed, thinking longing thoughts of something _cold_ in the heavily-incensed room.

"That is definitely happening when we get back. Strawberry."

"It's a date, then," Kate said as she popped a date in her mouth and grinned at her own pun.

* * *

The first thought that crossed Kurt's mind was that perhaps he and Logan had washed up on a shore somewhere after the storm and the pirate ship, since he could feel the sand at his back and the sun on his face, but when he opened his eyes and saw no sign of the ocean — and saw that the two of them were wearing nothing but white pants and red sashes, along with the usual swords — he just let out a sigh and lay back in the sand for a moment with his eyes closed.

"I'm getting very tired of this," he muttered to Logan, who was beginning to stir beside him. When Logan just glared at the sand dunes for a moment in answer, Kurt got to his feet and flexed out the hand and arm that was no longer attached to his best friend. "Perhaps Mojo thought we were too slow to get to our princesses," he said with a slight smirk as he dusted some of the sand out of his fur.

"Likely," Logan agreed. "I don't like the look of these, though." He was glaring at his wrist.

Kurt tipped his head to look over the golden bracelets with a little frown. "I suppose it's too much to hope they're just a fashion statement," he said.

"Pretty sure if they were, you'd have 'em too," Logan pointed out. He let out a sigh and tried to use his claws, and after a heavy cringe, he flexed his hand and shook his head. "Shoulda seen that coming." He shrugged and looked up at Kurt. "No claws. Guess we were killin' the bad guys too fast."

Kurt smirked softly. " _We_ were doing no such thing. The girls were," he said with a little laugh as he looked around the sand dunes. He sighed and held up a hand. "I'm going to 'port around — see which direction we should be going. I'll be right back."

"I'm not really goin' anywhere too quick," Logan said as he gestured to the nearest hill. "Just gonna climb up there and see if I can catch a scent on the wind."

Kurt nodded and teleported away as Logan climbed up the dune. It was a few minutes before Kurt returned, and when he did, he simply appeared at Logan's side, shaking his head. "There's a large palace several miles that way," he said, gesturing with one hand.

"That's probably it then," Logan said with a nod. "Not like he's ever been too subtle in how this crap is supposed to go."

"Yes, well, either way, it's tiring," Kurt said, shaking his head. "Treasure hunt or neon signs — I'm through with this nonsense." With that, Kurt nodded to himself and put a hand on Logan's shoulder to teleport them into the palace grounds so they could start up their search for the girls.

Frustratingly, it took Logan a while to find their scent with the heavy perfume in the air, but once he did, the two men made their way into the palace — though, unsurprisingly, it wasn't quite so simple as just _finding_ the girls.

As soon as they crossed the threshold of the palace, several men poured in from the halls, swords drawn, and the two old friends share a look before they simply drew their own weapons and jumped into the fray.

Mojo seemed to be trying to up the ante, as there were far more palace guards than there had been pirates to deal with, and though it was helpful not to be tied together any longer, it was still a fierce battle with so many opponents to reckon with.

They knew they were headed in the right direction, though, as the guards got thicker the further they went, and on the rare occasion they took a wrong turn, it nearly opened up into nothingness. Mojo's aim was clear — either the two X-Men fought a small army, or they didn't find K and Kate.

"I don't think he wants to give them back," Kurt said as he disarmed one of his opponents and took the second sword for himself only to flip it once and then plunge it into the nearest palace guard.

"Too damn bad for him," Logan growled out as they took on a fresh wave, and Kurt smirked at the sentiment as he twirled his own blades just a bit faster to cut through the obstacles between them and the girls.

True to form, it was practically a screaming neon light announcing that the two of them had found where the girls were being held when they got to two large doors, bolted shut from the outside, that were guarded by two very large men dressed similarly to Kurt and Logan.

On seeing the gigantic roadblocks, Logan turned to Kurt with a scowl. "I got these two — go see what the hell's taking the girls so long. We know they gotta be in there."

Kurt nodded — admittedly curious himself as to why they hadn't found the palace in tatters the way they'd found the pirate ship and the castle before it — and cut through the bolts on the door while Logan kept the guards occupied. However, when he peered inside, he could immediately see what the problem was, as both of the girls were simply… out of it, semi-conscious and sprawled across the pillows that decorated the room.

He knelt down beside Kate and tried to get her to focus on him, even taking her head in his hands, but she couldn't quite manage it and just leaned into his shoulder with a sedate smile and a muttered, "Elf."

Kurt frowned hard and put one hand on K's shoulder as he held Kate close, meaning to simply teleport the girls out of the heavily scented room — but he couldn't. With a frustrated growl low in the back of his throat, he laid Kate down gently, drew his swords again, and ran back to help Logan finish off the guards. "He's drugged them somehow — likely to keep them from upstaging the rescue effort," he said with narrowed eyes as soon as he got close enough to Logan.

"Kinda figured there was a dampening field when that idiot cut me," Logan replied, gesturing to a slash across his chest as the two of them made a surge forward as a team with practiced ease.

For as big as Mojo's hand-picked guards were, they were simply no match for two X-Men, especially when both of them were clearly _done_ with the situation in general — and even angrier at the fact that Kate and K had been drugged. In no time at all, both big men were down quickly, and Kurt and Logan were left to rush to the doped-up girls.

Unlike before, when the first signs of trouble had come as soon as they were reunited, it seemed this time they would be allowed to look after the girls — since both of them were able to pick up their respective girlfriends without any sign of gas or anything else from Mojo.

K had one arm around Logan's neck and was trying to hold on to him, shaking her head slowly. "I don't want to go to sleep again," she told him before she leaned her head on his.

"We're gonna get outta here," Logan told her before he turned to Kurt. "Got any bright ideas, Elf?"

"Find the edge of the dampening field and get them ... _conscious_ again," Kurt said as he scooped up an overly snuggly Kate and she buried her face into his chest. "And then find the edge of this… arena to have a word with Mojo."

"Let's get going," Logan said as the two of them headed away from the incensed room to find the field's edge. "As soon as you can, get us outta here."

Kurt nodded his agreement, but the moment the two of them stepped out of the tall doors, they felt the telltale pricks of darts at the base of their necks. Whatever they had been given started to work almost instantly, but the men had the wherewithal to make sure they fell to their knees first to keep from dropping the girls in their arms outright, slipping sideways after that instead of pitching forward before they both blacked out.


	9. Episode IV; No, These Are The Worst Outfits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> OMG, MOJO, STOP. They have had enough already! What could possibly happen to them now? Will the guys get to them before another reset and another costume change?

**Notes: Alright - here we go! Took a little time to fanagle, but … okay. So. You MAY remember a little collaboration that BOTH robbie and I took part in involving Marvels' best and brightest and throwing them into a hunger games format. Well. The sequel is now live on The Freelancer Collaboration titled 'When Blood Calls For Blood' and - extra special surprise - yours truly, and the always amazing Miss robbiepoo3241 are pirating that sucker. So to speak. Go. Check it out. See the fun we're having with a boatload of other authors.**

**We'll still be here in the 714 in the meantime, and …. Probably still doing the TeamAwesomeLives version of events as well. Why not? It's fun.**

* * *

**Chapter 9 "Episode IV: No, These are the Worst Outfits"**

* * *

_Welcome back to MojoVision's "The Amazing Nightcrawler and the Fearless Wolverine!" This season promised an epic love saga across the ages, and boy, have we delivered! We've seen our heroes fight to reunite with their heart's desires across the Middle Ages, the high seas, and Old Arabia!_

_Our last episode saw the fearless women, the objects of affection for our heroes, fall to temptation in an Arabian palace. With no way to save themselves, it was up to their dashing companions to save them!_

_This might have been the most emotional reunion yet, as viewers saw the Wolverine and Nightcrawler reunited with their lady loves in a state of disarray. Such gentleness! Such care! Such raw emotion!_

_Until then, our heroes had been bound together by the bands of friendship, as well as a little something more solid, but for such stakes, we decided to even the odds_ — _and the rewards were tender and sweet as much as they were bloody and brutal!_

 _In this latest episode, we take our band of heroes and lovers to a time long before anything they have seen thus far. The stakes are higher than ever as their very surroundings are out to kill them. Will we see another touching reunion? Or will this episode end in tears and bloodshed? Only time_ — _and the next episode_ — _will tell!_

* * *

Logan was first to wake up, and for a moment, he was reasonably sure that they were in the Savage Land, seeing as the place smelled like jungle and polar winds. When he rolled onto his side, he groaned as he glanced down and then reached over to shake Kurt awake. "Kurt. I'm blaming you. I don't know how — but I'm blaming you."

Kurt took a moment to wake up, still a bit tired as he said, "What have I done this time?"

"Commentary about the outfits," Logan said with a glare. "Looks like we don't get much this time."

Kurt glanced down at the skins that were barely covering them from the waist and just shook his head, deciding for the moment not to touch the subject. "Where are we this time, then?" he asked at last as he climbed to his feet.

"Looks and smells like the Savage Land," Logan replied.

Kurt let out a sigh as he looked around the jungle before he spotted the spears lying not far from where they were and ported over to check them for traps first before he picked them both up and tossed one to Logan. "No swords this time," he said. "That's a disappointment."

"And still no claws," Logan said with a shake of his head. He let out a sigh as he looked around. "Alright. Let's … find the girls and crack 'em over the head or somethin'. Drag 'em off to a cave."

"Doing Mojo's work for him, I see," Kurt said, smirking the slightest bit.

"Just gettin' ideas, that's all," Logan laughed.

Kurt chuckled in response and gestured with his spear for Logan to lead the way. "I'm sure it won't be too difficult to find them. Unless they've been drugged, we're sure to hear them yelling at the dinosaurs or something."

* * *

"K, I was wrong before. These are the worst outfits," Kate said as she took K's arm and shook her awake, sounding almost resigned at this point.

K glanced down at her 'outfit' and all but screamed out her frustration in a string of very Swedish sounding expletives before she angrily got to her feet and just glared at what little was covering her … everything. The furs hardly qualified as a bikini, let alone an outfit, and that didn't exactly allow for freedom of movement if they wanted to _stay_ covered.

"We are getting out of here one way or another, because frankly — I'm afraid next time we're gonna wake up with two band-aids and a postage stamp. And that is _not_ a suggestion."

Kate nodded her agreement as she took just a moment to make sure the lengths of fur were covering everything. "At least this time there's no Persephone fruits," Kate tried to joke. "Just a whole lot of cave. And eew, cozy furs to curl up on."

The ground was shaking in time with the roars outside, and the two of them ventured nearer the mouth of the cave to watch as a pair of massive dinosaurs clashed just outside the entrance, blocking any path out. "I think … for now, I'm good where we are," K said slowly. "But I am not going to snuggle."

"You said it." Kate nodded her agreement and ducked a little further into the cave. "Yeah. We'll let them settle their differences first. That looks like a family matter."

"Well. this sucks," K said as she walked her way back to the little fire that was burning at the back of the cave when they woke up.

"We'll be sure to register a complaint with the man in charge," Kate said. "I'll introduce my foot to his face and we'll go from there."

"Sounds good to me," K said with a little frown. "I don't like waiting for them to find us."

"Yeah, that didn't work out so well last time," Kate agreed. She tipped her head K's way. "What do you think — maybe there's a back door exit to the cave?"

"We can try," K said with a shrug. "But something tells me that's probably not going to happen."

"Better than sitting here and waiting for whichever dinosaur wins the match to decide this place is worth investigating," Kate pointed out.

"Alright," K said as she got up again. "Let's see if there's any fresh air deeper in the cave."

* * *

Logan and Kurt, meanwhile were running as fast as they could to get away from the locals that had decided they were trying to take over the village when they arrived looking for the girls. Spears and arrows were flying past them, but at least they hadn't started to attack using their animals too.

"This is punishment for cutting that field trip short, isn't it?" Kurt teased. Logan just chuckled a bit and as the two of them came up on a sheer drop, Kurt simply grabbed Logan's arm and teleported them to the other side of the chasm, out of reach from the natives.

"Guess we better start looking again," Logan said. "No idea where we are right now - that group looks and smells nothin' like the natives we usually deal with."

Kurt nodded his agreement as he looked around the jungle trees. "Well, at least we know the girls didn't take over the village there. If they'd been there, it's likely K would be their queen."

"I dunno," Logan said. "Kate and her bow — best 'em at their own game. It could be rough."

"Perhaps they'll share the throne," Kurt said with a little laugh. "Trade off on the weekends."

"And that leaves us as what? Their footstools?"

"Prince consorts, obviously," Kurt corrected him, grinning wide.

"Well let's get a move on before they find someone to replace us." He tipped his head back and tried to find a scent before he shook his head and nosed down a trail. "Just going to have to hope I catch either them or a stranger's scent. All the locals have a kinda similar undertone to them."

"Or hope that they find us — which wouldn't surprise me, all things considered," Kurt pointed out with a little smirk.

"Don't try to pretend that isn't exactly what you're hopin' for, Elf."

"It _would_ mean at least they weren't drugged this time," Kurt said, his tone diplomatic but the smirk still obvious.

* * *

The girls, meanwhile, were leaning back a bit and catching their breath after having climbed out of a crack in the volcano's side high above the cave they'd woken up in.

From their vantage point, they could watch the dino showdown and cool off a bit as a breeze blew gently from the edges of the Savage Land. "So. Which way do we go, George?" K said. "Any way we pick could take us further away from wherever our guys are holed up, and I don't feel like doing laps around this place looking for them."

"Spiral out, I guess," Kate said. "That's how Logan tracks things out here anyway, and if we're gonna do laps, might as well make them count."

"Yeah, not a bad plan," K said with a nod. "Or ... knowing them, maybe …. we could go up a little further and look for the smoke while they cause trouble."

"Also true," Kate agreed, then tipped her head back to look at the volcano's top. "Feel like some more rock climbing, K?"

"It's how we got into this mess in the first place. No reason it can't be how we get out. Let's just go up a little further. I don't want to scale the mountain, and if we need to get out of here quickly, I'd rather not be _all_ the way up. I'm not sure how well these stupid fur boots will last against the lava rock."

"Maybe we can start a fire of our own," Kate suggested, starting to grin at the thought. "Or at least some smoke. Let the boys have something to look for."

"Yeah, that sounds good," K agreed, nodding along. "In the meantime, we can see if there's something we can use to defend ourselves. I'm sure the boys have _something_ at least."

"I suppose it would be too much to hope for a bow unless we run into some natives," Kate said with a heavy sigh.

"I might be able to pull something together. Won't be as good as what you're used to though."

"At this point I'll take _an_ arrow," Kate said, leaning back with her head tipped to the sky. "I'm tired of the boys having all the toys."

"Well, these rocks can make a good knife," K said, picking up a rough chunk of obsidian. "Break off the edges a bit and it's as good as broken glass."

"It's a place to start," Kate said as she followed K's lead and then flashed her friend a grin. "Glad I brought my encyclopedia of how to kill things," she teased.

"Handy dandy," K said with a smirk as she started to work on her rock. "I think I'll be ready to take on those dinos once I get a knife."

"I'll scout you out a playmate," Kate promised with a laugh.

* * *

The guys had started to work their way toward the volcano, hoping to get into the control unit that kept the Savage Land from freezing into a block of solid ice, sure that if nothing else, they could get their bearings from there — though they were hoping to find something more substantial than their bearings. There hadn't been any more problems with natives that afternoon, but the dinosaurs were just overly vicious.

Kurt had just 'ported the two of them away from the snapping jaws of one of the dinos, and the two leaned against a tree to get their breath. "I think I prefer the area of the Savage Land we use for field trips," Kurt said with a small smile Logan's way once he had his breath back.

Logan just nodded his agreement, and the two men made their way in deeper toward the volcano, the sound of the dinosaur they'd just escaped stomping around just behind them keeping them at a quicker pace, even after it was obvious they were starting to get tired from the long hours' worth of searching, not to mention the days' worth of adventures since their ordeal began.

They were just turning past a thick bunch of trees when something thudded into the tree beside Logan, and they both startled and looked to see the chunk of black obsidian, with an unmistakeable "K" carved into it, embedded in the tree.

Kurt pulled the makeshift knife out of the trunk and then looked around to see where the girls were — they had to be close enough to see them. When he did spot the plume of smoke halfway up the volcano, he had to smile. "I think they found _us_."

"Does that surprise you somehow?" Logan asked with a smirk. "Besides. Pretty sure that was what you were angling for anyhow, wasn't it?"

"Yes, and I'm not surprised in the least," Kurt replied as he put his hand on Logan's shoulder and teleported them closer to the girls.

"I think their outfits are worse than ours. For once," Kate called out loud enough for the boys to hear. "Or better, depending on how you look at it," she added as the boys cleared the rock ledge and could see her huge, troublemaking smirk.

"False," K replied with a smirk.

"Oh, well, I can only speak for myself, but I think you both should bring yours home," Kurt countered with a grin.

"Alright, none of that crap right now, Casanova. Let's move fast," K said as she picked up another sharpened obsidian rock. "As soon as we meet up, they drug us or something, so let's _go_."

"Agreed," Kurt said as he put a hand on both girl's shoulders, ready to teleport them.

"We should get to the power generator," Logan said. "Probably the only place Mojo could be holed up." Both Kate and K wrapped an arm around Kurt's back to make it easier for Logan to step up too.

Kurt smirked at the two girls. "Casanova, _ja_?" he teased K's way.

"Oh. Absolutely," she agreed before leaning her head on his shoulder.

An instant later, the group of them had teleported to the control room — and as soon as the smoke had cleared even the slightest, Kate let out a long, loud, "Ewww," when she saw Mojo. She'd never met him before, and the slimy, bulbous _mass_ that was the entertainment director was enough to send anyone's stomach churning. It was the first time in a while she'd been grateful she didn't have anything but figs and dates in there to lose.

K half startled back and grabbed on to Kate with a grimace. "Yeah, you two big strong he-men can handle this all alone," she agreed, glaring Mojo's way.

Logan and Kurt shared a look and the two of them rushed forward to start pounding on him, but as usual, Mojo wasn't about to let himself get caught — or face the consequences for his actions.

" _Spiral!"_ he shrieked, and his multi-armed assistant seemed to appear out of nowhere through a spiralling vortex, to Kate and K's surprise.

The creepy creature scurried toward his escape route, while Spiral rushed toward the two X-Men with her swords drawn, at a clear advantage weapon wise against Kurt with his spear and Logan still bare-handed. She sliced through Kurt's spear as Mojo shouted out his threats and promises on his way out: "This isn't over!" mixed with "You'll be back" and various other nearly-expected things from him at this point, though those stopped when K growled his way and Kate made a rush that had him shrieking and rushing through the portal the rest of the way.

Spiral looked over her shoulder to see that Mojo had escaped before she grinned, kicked Logan back into Kurt, and stepped into the exit herself, leaving the four of them stranded in the Savage Land.

K had finally gotten over the dizziness that always came from teleporting when she looked over at Logan. "What are the chances that you can cut these stupid bracelets off for me?" She twisted her wrist his way. "I mean, I can't do it without getting shocked, but maybe you can."

He shook his head and reached out for her hand."I can try, but chances are we'll both end up on the ground," Logan told her before he turned to Kurt, who had found and destroyed the device that was hiding them from Cerebro. "Can you get your little blue friends to come here now?"

Kurt tossed aside the spear, tipped his head, and nodded. "I'm sure they'll be glad to see us," he said simply before, a few moments later, the little blue imps started appearing in puffs of smoke and immediately jabbering away at their missing friends, expressions ranging from frustrated to purely relieved, and K's little bamf went straight into a hug.

"Can you guys get us into our rooms, please?" K asked as she ran her fingers through her little bamf buddy's hair. "I'm reasonably sure Scott would die on the spot if we showed up like this."

The bamf giggled and nodded, patting her affectionately on the head, and the rest of the little guys just latched onto whoever was closest before, in a puff of smoke, they teleported right back to the mansion — and into the privacy of their rooms.

The four of them made a point to shower thoroughly — K and Kate especially feeling as if the whole thing was just _gross_. Particularly the part where they had been given less and less clothing — put on them by still-unknown strangers. But when they were all cleaned up and in comfortable clothes, the four of them met again down in the kitchen in time to ask Annie who was cooking tonight.

This of course just got a squeal of surprise as Annie made it a point to hug each of them in turn. "Where did you _go_? You've been missing for days — Scott was so worried!"

"New uniform shopping," K teased. "Kate found a purple one — or … three."

"And you should see what K can do in pink silks," Kate shot back with a smirk as Annie just shook her head disbelievingly at all of them.

"Really," she insisted, still wide-eyed. "What happened?"

"We ran into some trouble. I'm pretty sure Scott figured out that the trip to the coast was a false alarm," Kurt said mildly.

"But we're back now, and we would really like some food that's not… Persephone's," Kate said, glancing K's way.

"Yes, please," K said with a nod as she leaned back into Logan.

"Oh!" Annie looked between the four of them and noticed for the first time how tired they all looked. "Don't you worry about a thing, honey. I've got some leftover banana bread from last night, and I'm sure I can whip y'all up somethin' heartier while you're chewin' on that."

All four of them dove into it, getting Annie to raise an eyebrow, seeing as she'd never seen the two ferals take anything sweet without practically having to force-feed them. She was just pulling out the ingredients for some cornbread, with chicken already in the oven, when Scott walked into the kitchen.

"Smells good, Annie, what's…." He trailed off when he saw the four previously-missing teammates sitting at the table with the finished plate of banana bread between them. It took him all of a second to go from shock into stalking over to them. "Where have you _been_?"

K was quickest on the draw and simply crossed the space to take a little jump to throw her arms around his neck and give him a kiss on the cheek. "Creepy dude named Mojo. It was awful, and I missed you too."

Scott still looked a little thrown off as he almost absently returned the hug and patted her on the back. "Mojo?" he asked over her shoulder toward Kurt and Logan, who both nodded. He shook his head and let out a sigh. "How did you get out of whatever freak show he had this time?"

K finally turned her head his way to give him another quick kiss and a squeeze around the neck and let him go. "Just had to be quicker than him at the grab."

Annie was mixing up the cornbread as she slid over to give Scott a peck on the other cheek. "Stop questioning them honey — let them eat first," she teased. "Not a one of them's had a decent meal in days."

"He was freakin' dressing us up," K told him as she pulled him over by the hand to where the four of them were seated.

Scott raised his eyebrows at her as he sat down in the chair she'd pulled him into, and Annie set down a bowl of salad, instructing them to dig in while she made more. "I'm… sorry about that," he offered.

"Apparently, it was some rescue scenario," Logan told him, entirely amused at how off his guard Scott was from K's disarming friendliness. "But the girls kept screwing it up for him."

"Yeah, we decided being damsels in distress is dumb," Kate said easily as she poured dressing over her salad.

"Of course, it ended up giving us other problems," K said as she pulled up her sleeves to show to Scott. "Logan and I both do not have use of our claws until these things come off."

Scott leaned forward with a little frown as he looked over the bracelets. "I'll have Forge take a look at them when you two are done eating. Maybe he's got some ideas."

"Great," K said as she shot Logan a wink and took his hand with a little smirk as Annie just started putting toast, butter, and jam in front of them to keep them eating while the cornbread and chicken finished in the oven.


	10. Cross-Examination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tables turn and our counselor has to get defensive and work a little preliminary work with her associate.

**Chapter 10: "Cross-Examination"**

* * *

"So, where are they?" Kitty said as she marched into the kitchen of the mansion, taking nearly everyone there by surprise. "I'm here to remove those bracelet inhibitors Mojo slapped on them," she added when no one seemed to know what to say to her question, looking between Kate and Jubilee expectantly — since they were the two closest to the door.

Kate was sitting on the counter, drinking her coffee and talking to Jubilee, but at the unexpectedly sudden entrance from Kitty, she looked up in honest confusion. "Um ... those things came off, like, a week ago. Forge figured it out. Didn't you know?"

"Oh," Jubilee said melting theatrically as she smacked a hand to her forehead. "I knew there was something I forgot to tell you. Sorry about that, Kitty." There was hardly any pause before she immediately dove into her next statement: "Oh, hey! Good news, Logan's making dinner tonight, so you should totally stick around for your troubles."

Kate narrowed her eyes and looked between the two older X-Men, absolutely sure that Jubilee hadn't just "forgotten" to tell Kitty about the bracelets, though what they were really up to was beyond her — _for the moment._

"That depends on what he's doing," Kitty said as she took a seat at the counter. "Is it a fish night or venison?"

"Annie can't have the fish," Jubilee answered. "So do the math." Kitty grinned and nodded before she fixed Kate with a look — and Kate got the sinking feeling she suddenly knew _exactly_ why Kitty was there.

"And how are _you_ and the Amazing Nightcrawler doing these days?" Kitty asked.

"Going up to Alaska for the second dating anniversary in a couple weeks," Kate said easily. "Kurt won a bet, so he picked the spot."

"What was the bet?" Kitty asked, leaning over the counter toward her.

"He bet that he'd be the one to spot it when K said yes to Logan. You know. The official engagement," Kate said, leaning toward Kitty with a wide grin.

"Ah," she said, nodding slowly. "And Kurt spotted it. But ... there are no improvements on that front for you two?"

Kate tipped her head to the side and just slowly shook her head 'no.' She really didn't want to get into it with Kitty, especially this soon after the Mojo thing when she was more focused on feeling less _icky_ than on anything else.

"I figured you seeing that K didn't die from agreeing to marry the man that loves her might have inspired some _faith._ "

"Hey." Kate leveled a finger at Kitty. "I'm not getting married to _anybody_ because you _threatened_ me into it."

"What was my threat?" Kitty asked with narrowed eyes.

Kate just met her gaze for a moment. "He listens to you, Kitty," she said in a quiet tone, as if it should have been obvious that one of Kurt's dearest friends pushing something she wasn't sure she was ready for was a threat in itself.

Kitty shook her head. "Just ... you know what? You're right. I should find out if he'd even want to before I jump to conclusions." She switched to a softer smile. "Besides, I'm not here to give you a hard time. Sorry. I'm just a little - irritated and could totally use some chocolate."

Kate looked surprised at the total switch before she gestured to the fridge. "There's chocolate ice cream. I keep us in stock."

"Not before dinner," Kitty said. "That would be a terrible mistake."

"Suit yourself," Kate said as she hopped down from the counter. "I'm just… going to go check on the bamfs."

"Hey, you wouldn't happen to know where I can find K would you?" Kitty called after her.

"She likes to leave for a ride while Logan's cooking," Kate said, though she didn't say anything further, not about to throw K under the bus if Kitty was in a mood like this. "She'll be back in time for dinner."

"Is that equine or Milwaukee?" Kitty asked.

"She likes both, but, you know, there's no horses here," Kate said with a grin. "Though Storm was saying just yesterday maybe we should get some and try to rope K into teaching riding classes."

"It's been years since we've had horses," Jubilee said thoughtfully.

"I own a few if we wanted to use them," Kate put in. "We've been up there a few times — me and K and the boys." She shrugged up to her ear and turned back to the door. "Anyway, I'm gonna go find Kurt and the little imps. But I'll see you two at dinner," she said before she slipped out of the kitchen and away from the conversation.

"Nice talking to you," Kitty called out before Jubilee joined her, the two of them with their heads together and whispering, plotting out the main reason for Kitty's visit — getting to the bottom of the problem with K and Logan and getting them to actually set a date instead of letting K string along their favorite person in the world. Though Kitty wasn't opposed to grilling Kate, too, seeing as it was _obvious_ to her that Kurt wanted to settle down with a family in his life.

* * *

As Jubilee had suggested, Kitty ended up staying for dinner — and Logan treated the whole group of them to a serious meal of venison and potatoes that left everybody nice and full and content as the dinner conversation started to split into little groups as usual as the meal wound down.

"So," Kitty said as she looked up at K. "I've been meaning to ask, but I figured it would be something better said in person — when's the big day?"

"No idea," K replied easily. "I'll let you know. Don't worry." She barely looked Kitty's way as she answered the question, looking totally at ease, and her lack of anxiety had Kitty sitting back in her chair.

Kitty frowned for a moment then turned to Jubilee with a shrug. So much for the subtle approach.

"It's just been so busy around here lately," Annie said with a smile and a shrug as she cut in to try to explain. "This summer was particularly packed full of danger for these four over here, but then, I've heard that's always the case." She tipped her head at Logan and Kurt in particular.

"Kinda comes with the job description," Logan told her gently.

"Heaven knows I know that — family I come from. But it does seem to come in waves, doesn't it?" Annie said thoughtfully before a small smile flitted over her face. "But good things come in waves, too. Two weddings and a proposal in just the last year that Scott and I have been married — it does seem to be the time for it."

"Yeah, it does," Kitty said. "Too bad we don't have any more lined up yet." She didn't even try to hide the look she was giving Kurt and Kate.

"How are things with that space … gigolo or whatever you call him that you've been with for ... how long has that been?" K asked suddenly with her eyes narrowed slightly. "Should be considering things at your age."

At that, Kitty flushed a bright red. "He's — we're—"

"Then maybe don't push anyone else until you figure out your own love life," K said when it was clear Kitty didn't have an answer. "You're projecting and It's rude to push."

Dinner was just ending anyhow, so it wasn't that big of a deal when K gave Kitty as kind of a smile as she knew how and then gave Logan a lingering kiss before she turned to Kate. "Do you mind taking a walk with me? Storm was asking about horseback riding lessons, and I haven't looked in the barn to see if it's even possible this fall."

Kate nodded quickly and followed K's lead, giving Kurt a quick kiss as well before she all but skipped out of the room after her friend, glad for the reprieve on the questioning front.

As soon as they were out of the mansion, Kate slipped her arm through K's and gave her a bit of a side hug. "Where were you at Jubilee's wedding? I could have _used_ your help," she breathed out, not wanting to admit that Kitty scared her even though she knew K could probably scent it.

"I believe I was dancing with your Elf — or … at least, I was entertaining him. He was laughing himself sick after he teleported us about half a dozen times and I couldn't stand up without his help. Rude," K said with a shake of her head.

"As he keeps reminding me when he annoys me — he _is_ half-demon," Kate pointed out with a chuckle.

"He just found it _so_ amusing that I get more dizzy than Logan," K laughed.

"Well, he was already in a good mood. He loves officiating," Kate said, shrugging her shoulders. "You were just the cherry on the cake, my friend."

"Always glad to be of service," K said before they reached the barn. "How hard is his head spinning right now?" She pulled open the barn door and watched Kate's expression as they stepped inside.

Kate giggled a little bit. "You should see him. This morning was particularly hilarious, because he switched decisions halfway through his — oh, what, twelfth version of his best man speech? Scrapped it and started writing opening remarks before he changed his mind _again_."

"He should slow down," K said seriously. "It's not happening any time soon."

"Maybe, but every time I tell him that, he just gives me this _look_." Kate deepened her voice and put on a passable imitation of Kurt's accent. "I just want to make sure I have this perfect — it may take some time anyway, and I want to get it right."

K let out a sigh and made a point to look at the dusty stalls as she weighed it out. "I told Logan the same thing," she said. "I am in no rush at all. Scott's kids could be starting school before I'll even consider it."

"So why'd you say yes?" Kate asked, genuinely curious. "If you don't want to marry him?"

"I didn't say I didn't want to. I just don't want to right _now_." She waved her hand and scrunched her brow. "I have avoided this entirely forever. I just don't trust the marriage thing. Too close to needing permission or ... ownership."

"That's… way old-fashioned," Kate said with a bit of a frown. "But, considering the man in question, I get the point. You're wrong, but I get the point."

"I can remember before women were allowed to vote," K told her quietly. "Permission is an issue for me. And he's older than I am."

Kate stopped and considered her for a moment before she just nodded. "Yeah, okay. That makes sense. I mean — for back then — but for you and him…." She shrugged. "Yeah. If he ever starts treating you that way, you'll tell me so I can hit him, right? You know, girl power and all that?"

"I won't need anyone to hit him for me," she said with a smirk. "I can do that just fine myself if need be."

"Yeah, but I'd like in on it too," Kate said, grinning.

K gave her a dry sort of smirk before she shrugged Kate's way. "What about you? You told me a little. But not how it applies to this one. Do you want to keep him?"

"For as long as he's interested, yeah," Kate said honestly, her voice growing a little quieter as she thought of it thanks to the honest terror right down to her bones that she was actually starting to get _frustrated_ by.

"So if that ends up being fifty, sixty years? You okay not being married to him that far down the road?" K asked.

Kate scuffed the ground with one foot. "Maybe somewhere in there I'd like to… _maybe_. But he'll probably get tired before that."

"Have you seen the way he looks at you?" K asked, one eyebrow raised. "He's just waiting for you to be okay with the idea. He's in it for the long haul."

"K, I've been to about twenty weddings for girls I went to school with, and do you know how long they last?" Kate asked suddenly, this time without the frustrating hesitation to her tone.

"And did those guys treat them like he treats you?"

"Some of them did. Right up until the vows. And then — bye bye trust fund."

"I know the type," K said with a nod. "And, as stated on record — I can smell a lie. That boy? Doesn't lie. He doesn't deceive. He just doesn't. Not to his friends anyhow. Still think he's going to screw you over for money? Ask him to sign a prenup. I bet he'd do it in a heartbeat. Doubt he'd even read it."

Kate rubbed the back of her neck for a moment. "I don't… It's not that I think he'd do that."

"I get it," K said, relaxing her shoulders a bit more and looking totally calm. "Really. I do. Believe me — out of everyone here — _I get it._ But if you really wanna keep him? Paper him. Skip the wedding if that's the scary part, but give him a piece of paper to feel all warm and fuzzy over."

Kate was quiet for a bit as she looked at the ground before, finally, she looked up at K with a bit of a smirk. "I thought you were supposed to be protecting me from the cross-examination."

"Oh, I am," K said. "I'm not cross-examining you. Consider me your defense lawyer. I have at least one other client that'll vouch for me in that realm. But when it's you and me? I'm going to give you what I think."

"Fair enough," Kate admitted. She pushed back her bangs and then let out a breath. "So... if it's just you and me? Logan's a good friend, and he's never once treated me like other people — even _freaking Captain America_ — have treated me. I doubt he'd treat you like a possession. Just my opinion."

"And just between you and me? In that regard, you're probably right. But for us? 'Till death' can be a lot longer than it can be for everyone else. I gotta be a little less nervous about the end result."

Kate snorted out a bit of a laugh and shook her head. "It's kinda not fair that your reasons are so much better than mine. Just so you know."

"I've had a long time to build my reasons up," K told her. "I am _vintage_ , sweetheart."

Kate laughed and threaded her arm through K's. "I love vintage," she said with a grin.

"You know ... I have some … originals you might be interested in. Hidden away at my little cottage. I think you might appreciate them, my little fashion queen."

Kate broke into a huge smile. "Next time we need a girls' getaway, that is _so_ happening."

"I only have one designer I ever liked — and it's all custom sized for me, or it was. But ... you can see what might be useable for you. Couple inches won't matter on some of it."

"Oh, no, I'm not going to touch it. I just need to see... " Kate had a wide grin on. "You're looking at the girl who designed her entire team's look."

"You're _going to want to touch it,_ " K told her with a smile. "Silk, all of it from Paris in the '30's. Custom from Madame Coco."

Kate's eyes were wide. "You're kidding me."

"Only designer I ever liked," K said. "She smoked like a chimney and was sassy as all get out."

"You can't tell, because I'm trying to play it cool, but I've never been this jealous in my life," Kate said, the grin somehow getting even wider than before and threatening to split her face.

"Well I guess we need a reason to go to the cottage then," K said. "Even if we don't bring the boys. I'll show you how to do your hair right."

* * *

As soon as the door had closed behind K and Kate on their way to the stables, Kitty turned to Kurt and let out a huff. "You got a minute? I really need to talk to you. Alone."

Kurt tilted his head at her for a moment with one eyebrow raised high before he said, "Of course. I always have a minute for you, _katzchen_."

She gave him a warm smile, and in a moment, after a poof of blue smoke, the two of them were walking arm in arm in Ororo's gardens. "I may have been giving Kate a hard time," Kitty started out. "And it occurred to me that maybe I was picking too hard? And going about this the wrong way."

"It can be a delicate subject," Kurt said with a little nod, guessing already where she was going, considering the dinner conversation.

"Do you _want_ to marry her?" Kitty asked outright as she turned his way to watch his reaction for herself. "I know you care for her, but do you actually want to?"

He smiled warmly at her for a moment and nodded. "I'd like nothing more ... but it does make things easier knowing where she stands," he admitted.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Kitty asked. "Doesn't she love you?"

"Yes," Kurt said, leaning forward a bit to look her squarely. "And I her."

"Then what does that mean, 'knowing where she stands'? She doesn't believe in marriage? Doesn't … what? What's the problem? I don't get it."

Kurt sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. " _Katzchen_ ," he said cajolingly. "You know as well as I do that — considering my father, I can't exactly…." He trailed off and shrugged, suddenly more uncomfortable. "And _that_ is much less of an issue if she doesn't want to get married."

"Your father isn't stopping you from getting married," Kitty said. "And why wouldn't she want to marry you?"

Kurt laughed quietly. "One of her friends tried to explain it to me once. She talked in circles for half an hour, and I'm still not sure I understood it," he admitted. "But I think it was something about the fact that her father very likely killed her mother for a divorce? As I understand it."

"Oh," Kitty said, letting out a sigh. "She's one of _those_ kids." She relaxed into him as she squeezed his arm. "Well, that just means she's not ready yet. I'll be nice. Now that I know."

"I'm sure she'll appreciate it," Kurt said, smiling quietly before he leaned over to kiss her forehead. "But I appreciate you looking out for my best interests."

For a moment, the two of them simply walked arm-in-arm together through the gardens after that, enjoying the time together as old friends, before Kitty came to a stop and turned Kurt's way. "Other matters are at hand now that I know what's going on with you and the lady Hawkeye," she said. "And I am fully enlisting your help in this one. K." Kitty paused to take a breath before she continued, leaning closer to him before she started in a much more hushed tone. "You know, Jubilee and I are under the impression that K has no intentions of actually _marrying_ Logan, right?"

Kurt raised both eyebrows high. "What gives you that idea?" he asked, his tail switching behind him as it was clear the idea had him annoyed.

"She was ready to run at the first mention of anything even close to a wedding, and now? It's like she's figured out how to get everyone off her back. Nothing has changed. She doesn't even have a ring — and there is _nothing_ that's different outside of the title. Or am I wrong?"

Kurt frowned for a moment. "No, you aren't wrong," he said softly, thinking about how the two ferals seemed perfectly content to more or less continue on as they were.

"So ... we need to get that woman to either do the right thing — or leave him alone."

Kurt nodded thoughtfully. "Do you two already have a plan for what you'd like me to do to help?" he asked with a slowly growing smile.

"We'd like for Logan to be happy. We don't want to chase off someone that could actually be good for him that he's fallen for. I mean, his _record,_ Kurt. So, we really just want to try to get her to pick a stupid date. _Any_ date. Think you can work that out? I tried to kick it off, but she just … she shot me down. And I'm pretty sure she knows Storm is trying to come up with more reasons to _keep_ her here."

Kurt nodded. "I'll do what I can — for both her and Logan," he promised.

* * *

Kurt had stayed to see Kitty off, so when he got back to his room, Kate was already in her pajamas, brushing out her wet hair. She looked up when he came in, grinned, waved her fingers, and then went back to brushing her hair again, even though it was well brushed out, her gaze somewhere else as she was clearly thinking something over.

He changed as well and waited for her to finish washing her face before she climbed in beside him with a little smile and laid her head on his chest. "Hi there," she said as she rested her arm across his middle. "You been waiting long?"

He shook his head at her and kissed the top of her head. "Not very long," he told her. "I didn't want to interrupt whatever it was you were thinking about. You looked lost in it."

She leaned up and kissed his cheek. "You know how it is when you go chasing a train of thought," she said lightly.

"I don't suppose you were planning out how to get the barn set up for K's riding classes?" he asked carefully, and Kate looked surprised for a moment before she just shook her head.

"I — uh — don't actually know if she's going to do the class for sure or not. Maybe… we'll ask her if she's talked to Storm over coffee tomorrow?"

Kurt smiled her way for a moment. "I thought that's what you were helping her with in the barn?"

"Oh yeah…" Kate shrugged one shoulder. "Well, we went to the barn? But then the conversation sort of… got away from us. That was our bad."

"Sounds terribly interesting then," Kurt said, realizing that Kitty was probably right. K knew that Storm was trying to add reasons for her to stay, and like the marriage issue, she was tap dancing around it beautifully. "Anything you can share?"

Kate thought it over for a moment and then let out a sigh. "Well, she was telling me about how she was around before women had the right to vote. But on the other hand, she has some _vintage_ dresses I'm totally stealing designs from."

"Why would you steal vintage designs?" he asked with a frown. "And did she mention how old she actually was?"

"No to the second question — and because I am _made_ of vintage, honey," Kate said with a smile. "I'm an archer."

Kurt laughed a bit and kissed the top of her head. "That's all? What in the world had the conversation on the right to vote?"

Kate chewed the words over for a moment, not wanting to give too much away. "Um ... Kitty, actually. The whole dinner conversation. We were talking about how it was back then. You know. Women were property, that sort of thing," she tried to explain.

"You're going to have to walk me there a little bit. I'm clearly not following you," he said, letting out a sigh.

Kate shifted slightly beside him and just snuggled in a bit more as she thought over her answer. "Well, I mean, Kitty's been pushing K on setting a date, so I asked her what her thoughts were on marriage anyway? And she pointed out that she was around when marriage was more or less ownership, not … what it is now." She let out a sigh. "So she has a bit of an issue with the idea of possession in marriage, things like that."

Kurt suddenly got it a lot more than he had expected to. "That ... makes sense," he said as his body relaxed a bit. "But that's not how it is now. At all. And that's not how _he_ is. Has she considered a date?"

"Not really," Kate said. "I think she wanted to be a little more… sure of what she was doing, she said. Like ... if she's going to spend the rest of her unnaturally long life with someone? She wants to be _sure_ sure."

"She's being nervous," Kurt said with a little smile.

"Yeah, she kind of is," Kate admitted.

"We need to ease her mind then," Kurt said, grinning outright.

"You got any plans on how to do that, sneaky little Elf of mine?" Kate teased, seeing his expression.

"Not yet," he said, grinning wider. "But at least I know what the problem is."

Kate smirked at him for a moment. "Doing your best man duty, then?"

"I think she'll do it with a little … help." He looked down at her. "Do you know what she's been doing in her training time — outside of scaring the stuff out of Scott?"

"Pretty sure she queued up some stuff with Sabretooth," Kate said with a shrug. "At least, that's what she mentioned the other day."

"That's _all_ she's doing," Kurt said. "She's making Logan coach her — but not help. She renamed _his_ Sabretooth sim 'little bitch'. And she's learning how to fight him alone."

Kate laughed outright. "Well that's one way to get back at him," she chuckled.

"She's the only one who's wanted to take him on herself. Anyone else would be trying to hide behind Logan," Kurt said with a pleased smirk.

"That's a good sign for Logan," Kate pointed out. "Got himself a girlfriend who can keep up."

"Keep up, yes, that's what it is," Kurt laughed. "My little princess who slayed her own dragon." He kissed the top of her head again. "I'm only grateful that America didn't have access to any of the proof of what happened."

"Can you _imagine_?" Kate shook her head and laughed. "I'd never live it down. Neither would you, but _oh man_."

"I'm just imagining her laughter over how you two were supposed to be the pretty accessories and it was Logan and I that ended up mostly watching the show," Kurt grinned. "You girls put us to shame."

"You boys were just too slow," Kate agreed as she kissed his jaw. "The outfits were cute, though. I liked the pirate coat."

"I wasn't sure what yours was, to be honest," Kurt said.

"That's because K helped me get out of most of it while we were still in the brig. The corset just about killed me when I woke up. No oxygen."

"The third outfit was fun too," Kurt grinned.

"Oh yeah, that was when you started going shirtless," Kate laughed. "Good look for you, handsome."

He just laughed and kissed her into the pillows. "You were drugged. You can't remember _that_ much."

"There was a fuzzy blue shirtless elf. What more could I _possibly_ need to remember?" she teased him as she pulled him closer to kiss him right back.


	11. Not Quite How Logan Expected This To Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are kinda sorta falling into line. The Elf has gotten his romantic getaway with his Hawkeye, fireside snuggles, and cocoa, and Logan is gaining an assistant as he heads out to find his fiance something sparkly. Shopping has never been more interesting.

It seemed to be the season for romantic getaways. Kate and Kurt got back from their trip to Alaska — as per Kate's bet with Kurt — just about the time Scott and Annie were leaving for their wedding anniversary trip to Jekyll Island. Annie had just enough time to give Kate a hug and a 'welcome back' before they were off, too, and Kate and Kurt made their way back upstairs to unpack and unwind, still very much wrapped up in each other.

Kate laid out on the bed with a loud, long, "ahh," before she grinned up at Kurt. "It's so much warmer here. What kind of place is that cold in the _summertime_ , Kurt?" she teased.

"The northern tundra," he replied with a smirk.

She laughed at him and picked up a pillow to throw at him from across the room. "It's a good thing you're so cute," she teased him. "And good for snuggling."

"Which was the entire point," Kurt said before he caught the pillow and 'ported over to give her a quick kiss.

"This is true. Sneaky elf," she agreed, stealing the pillow back from him and tossing it over her shoulder to where it more or less belonged. She stole another, longer kiss before she stretched out again and then stood up. "I'm going to go find some coffee," she told him and kissed his cheek. "And maybe answer a few work emails."

"Ah, yes. Back to work." He nodded thoughtfully for a moment. "And I think I'll go see how things are going in the barn." He gave her a broad grin and waggled his eyebrows.

She laughed and kissed him again. " _Bis naccher_ ," she whispered in his ear, kissed him one more time just because, and then slipped out the door.

Actually, Kate had every intention of — eventually — getting to her office and getting some work done, but she actually had one last stop that she wanted to make… she thought. Maybe. Possibly. She was still trying to decide on this one, actually.

This had been a long time coming. This meeting. This… conversation. Whatever it was. If she was honest with herself, she had been thinking about it since New Orleans and trying desperately to pretend she wasn't, but… after that trip with Kurt… just the two of them… and after a whole lot of praying that she'd never done before...

She paused outside the door to Storm's office, trying to decide whether or not she should knock or just... forget it. But the decision was made for her when Storm opened the door from the inside and looked surprised to see her standing there.

"Welcome back," Storm said with a broad smile once she had recovered from the surprise. "I'm glad to see you both made it through three days without incident."

"Squeaked through by the grace of God," Kate teased with a little smile. She cleared her throat and bit her lip. "Actually… if you have a minute? I was looking for… I guess... a sounding board?"

"Of course, any time — you know that," Storm said. "Did you want to stay in the office, or is fresh air preferable?"

"Well, maybe we should stay in," Kate said, rubbing the back of her neck. "I don't want anyone to overhear and… get ideas."

Storm tipped her head to the side and simply stepped out of the way so that Kate could slip in past her before she closed the door behind them. "What's on your mind, Hawkeye?"

"A _lot_ ," Kate admitted honestly. She rubbed the back of her neck one more time and then gingerly sat in the nearest chair. "I… So, I talked with K the other day in the barn, and she kinda blew through all my excuses, and now I'm just sitting here thinking, maybe I _should_ get married?" She looked up at Storm, wondering if she was making sense and knowing that she wasn't for how quickly she was talking. "And I'm trying to figure out if she just logicked me into it or if I actually _want_ to."

"You're sure it was _K_ who logicked you _into_ thinking about marriage?" Storm asked with a look of disbelief.

"Believe it or not," Kate said with a little laugh, "Yeah."

"I can see where that would throw you," Storm said, nodding as she sat down across from Kate with a completely sympathetic expression. "But perhaps it would be easier if you shared with me what you're thinking."

Kate laughed. "Yeah, probably," she agreed before she leaned forward a bit, her hands clasped in front of her as she thought it over. "I guess… I just never thought I'd _get_ married? But I don't see myself ever leaving Kurt. And spending time with him is the happiest I've ever been… So ... does that mean I should marry him?" She looked up at Storm openly. "How do you even know you're _ready_ for something like that?"

Storm watched the confused younger woman for a long time, smiling encouragingly. "I don't know that anyone can ever help you decide that, but I can tell you from watching my friends over the years that if you can't imagine your life without him, then you should consider making sure he is a part of it."

"Yeah." Kate let out a bit of a sigh and a rueful grin. "I just keep running out of reasons not to."

Storm gave her a soft smile and rested her hand on Kate's arm. "If the reasons you have to do it make far more sense than the reasons — or fears — not to ... then you already know the answer."

"Yeah," Kate agreed, leaning back a bit. "Yeah… I guess…. It still terrifies me though."

"Of course it does," Storm said with a little laugh. "You'd be a fool if it didn't, because you actually mean it. You're not considering it for the wrong reasons. You're considering it with your heart on the line."

"Oh, good." Kate let out a relieved breath. "I was kinda worried the sheer terror was a bad thing."

"Is it the terror of being married at all, or the terror of being married to _him_ , because I can tell you, my friend, there is a difference." Storm drew in a deep breath and leaned back in her chair for a moment before she relaxed as she seemed to settle on a track for her advice. "You know that I once married — for all the wrong reasons."

"I didn't know the reasons," Kate admitted. "I mean, you've mentioned the marriage at movie nights, but I figured it wasn't something I should pry into."

"It was for the sake of unifying a nation," Storm said. She let out a small sigh at the memory of it all. "I did it with no warning. Hardly anyone knew about it until well after the fact — and it hurt my friends that I would do something so serious without thinking to even invite them. In the end, even though we tried to make it work — the love was never there."

"That's… not what marriage should be. But that's what it is sometimes."

"The one and only reason that you should ever marry — is for love," Storm said as she leaned forward with a little spark to her gaze. "If you have that you have it all."

"And I'm hopelessly in love," Kate said honestly. "Really."

"And so is he," Storm said gently. "Believe me — I know my little brother."

Kate leaned back and let out a sigh. "Yeah. I… yeah." She looked up at Storm with one eye closed. "It's going to sound really stupid ... I just… keep expecting to find out he's done. Or find out something awful. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"That simply won't happen with Kurt," Storm said easily. "His life is an open book, and he wears his heart on his sleeve for all the world to see."

"He does," Kate said. She let out a little laugh. "You know we'd known each other for all of a few days when I found out his dad's a literal demon? Talk about an open book…." She shook her head slightly and then started to stand. "Thanks. Really ... I needed a sounding board."

"Anytime," Storm promised as she stood with Kate, then paused as her expression turned a bit more mischievous. "You know …. if you have nothing bigger on your schedule, Logan is ready to head downtown to buy a ring. He might need some help — even if he denies it."

Kate broke into a grin. "I'm a pro at shopping. I helped Billy _and_ Teddy pick out rings," she admitted.

"Then you've done it more recently than he has."

Kate grinned at her friend and then suddenly rushed over to wrap her in a hug. "Thanks again," she said as she pulled Storm around the shoulders before she all but dashed out of the office to go find Logan, the beginnings of a plan already in her head.

* * *

When Kate did find Logan at last, he was in the garage working on his bike again, and she grinned at him as she stepped out into his line of sight. "That thing still good to ride on, or should we take my car?" she teased.

"I'm not going anywhere in your car," he told her. "Bike is fine, but I'm heading out in the Jeep. You know — the one you and Jubes left in the middle of some damn warehouse?"

She grinned at him broadly and drew a halo over her head before she all but skipped over to the Jeep. "Great. I'm coming with you."

"Why?" he asked. "I don't need your help."

"First of all? Yes you do," Kate countered. "And second of all, because I said so. C'mon, Wolverine — I'll even let you drive."

" _Let me drive?_ My own car? Maybe I will take the bike," he replied.

"C'mon, please?" Kate fluttered her eyelashes at him.

"Please take the bike? I don't see why not. New oil, fixed the transmission. Should be good."

"Great. I'll grab a helmet," Kate returned.

"No, Kate — I don't _want or need_ your help, super shopper."

Kate planted her feet for a moment, crossed her arms — and then shifted her entire body language very suddenly as she let out a breath, checked over both shoulders, and whispered low, "Yeah, but I want _yours._ "

He looked up at her quizzically and tipped his head slightly to the side as he wiped his hands clean. "Is this one of those 'won't tell me until we're on the road' things?"

She nodded at him and waved her finger around the room. "The walls have ears in this place, Wolverine. Seriously."

He let out a breath. "Alright, but you're not touching my radio," he warned. "Jeep." He headed over to wash his hands of the last of the grease before turning to find her bouncing her way to the Jeep.

"Fair enough," she said as she slid into the passenger seat, already grinning at him.

He gave her a look before he climbed in and started it up. They headed out, and he even went so far as not to ask her anything until they were well away from the mansion and its walls with ears. "We far enough out yet for you to spill?" he asked at last.

Kate chewed on her lower lip for a while before she nodded. It wasn't just the fact that she was worried someone would overhear her that had her nervous for this particular conversation, all things considered, so it took her a while to work up to it. "I think… I think I'd like to buy a ring. Just to have one. For Kurt. For when I work up the nerve," she said in a rush, picking up speed as she did so.

He frowned and kept his eyes forward for a few moments before he spoke slowly. "You're gonna ask _him_?"

"Why not?" Kate shrugged both shoulders up to her ears. "I mean, he's just… everyone says he's just waiting for _me_ to catch up. So ... why not have a good way to tell him when I finally… work up to it?"

He kept his silence for a long stretch before he slowly nodded. "Fair enough."

Kate tipped her head to the side, her lower lip slightly jutted out. "You don't seem all that thrilled about it. Did… should I have asked you permission or something?" she asked, genuinely worried.

He cracked a smile and turned her way. "No, not necessary. Just wasn't expecting it, that's all."

"I wasn't either," Kate admitted, her hands worrying themselves in her lap. "But… K gave me some things to think about, and… spending a weekend with him…"

"Did she now?" he asked quietly. "What could she have said to you to get you thinkin' like that?"

"She blew holes in every single one of my reasons," Kate told him frankly. "Every single one."

"She's good at that," he said with a nod. "Kinda think that Murdock would have a hell of a time against her if she decided it would be fun."

"I'd pay to see that." Kate snorted, shaking her head before she looked up at Logan. "Anyway, you know ... I just spent a weekend with him, spent the whole time thinking about it…. And K's right. I love him, so ... that's… I guess that's it."

He smirked a bit and let out a breath. "I guess it is."

She relaxed and leaned back in the seat next to him with a shy smile. "So. Ring shopping. Let's hit it, Logan."

At the quiet little jewelry maker that they stopped at, though, she started up a bit of a pattern: Kate had promised to leave Logan to his own devices… until she found a ring she might like, panicked, and flitted over to where Logan was to lean over his shoulder and offer her "input" to distract herself from thinking about actually _settling_ on something.

"Ooh, no, that one is too thick. No good for small fingers," Kate said as she shook her head at one of the rings he was considering.

He slowly turned to glare at her for a moment. "I haven't even come close to picking something out. Don't you have your own homework to do?"

"Yeah, yeah, I was just making sure you weren't going to pick something gaudy," Kate defended.

He gave her a dry look and turned back to poking around, flat ignoring that little comment. "Tell you what — why don't you try a few on for me so I can see them better."

Kate let out a breath, obviously relieved to have something to do to help. "Yes, sure, I can do that," she agreed quickly.

He gestured to the several dozen in front of them. "Knock yourself out."

She paused and tipped her head at him. "You don't have a favorite yet?"

"I have a few thoughts. Curious to see what _you_ think would work for her, since you seem to know everything."

Kate thought about it for a moment before she picked out one of the smaller, less ostentatious rings to try on, examining it for a moment. "What do you think? Nothing too… obvious, I'm thinking for her. Or do you think she'd go the other way?"

"That's pretty — but the setting looks like it might get caught on her jeans pocket."

Kate blinked at him for a long moment in obvious surprise that he'd notice that. "Yeah."

"I'm not a total moron," Logan told her. "I've done this before. I can figure this out." He gave her a little wave to shoo her off.

"Apparently." She narrowed her eyes at him for a moment, put the ring back, and slowly made her way back over to where the men's rings were.

She wasn't there ten minutes before he popped up next to her. "This shouldn't be that hard," he said over her shoulder. "Not nearly as many choices, and I'm done."

"Kinda the problem, isn't it?" she teased lightly.

"They do custom work here," he told her. "Had 'em make a pendant for Jubilee once for her birthday."

Kate grinned at him for a moment and then nodded. "Yeah, I know they do that — I mean… it would be hard for me to get him anything that's not custom, considering."

"So talk to the girl. I'll go down the block to the bar if you want privacy."

She seized his arm for a moment, eyes wide. "Don't ditch me," she said quietly. "Or I might … leave. And I _want_ to do this. Don't let me chicken out. I'm serious."

"Okay, I'll stay," he said with a nod. "Save you from bein' a chickenhawk. Again."

She relaxed her grip, glared at the nickname, and nodded before she took one last look over the rings she'd been looking at. "Okay. Right. Yeah. Just stay here. Don't go anywhere," she said, holding both hands up to Logan to tell him to stay put before she made her way over to talk to the girl behind the glass counter, who was watching the whole thing with an amused look that professionally disappeared as soon as Kate turned her attention her way.

Logan waited patiently for her as she kept glancing his way every once in a while, talking in quiet whispers with the girl that he pretended not to be able to hear — mostly because they consisted of Kate making a decision and then immediately backtracking. To the girl's credit, she stuck with Kate the whole way through until she finally decided on a deep Tungsten black with a white gold band in the middle, though the girl's eyebrows rose high when Kate explained the size she needed and why it was custom.

Finally, the two of them headed out of the store, and Kate leaned her head onto Logan's shoulder and slumped. "That was really hard," she said, pure exhaustion ringing in her tone. "I think ... let's go to a bar."

"Sounds good to me," he agreed. "We grabbin' a bite or is this strictly drinkin'? Makes a difference on where we go."

"Food… does not sound good right now," she muttered.

He chuckled at her and put his arm around her back as he gave her an affectionate little one armed squeeze. "Got it. I know just the place."


	12. Mr. Fisk Makes An Appointment

As the school year steadily approached, there was plenty to do around the mansion to get ready while students started to trickle in — though on top of that, Kate was facing a huge party at work. The start of the school year was a big boost for book sales, from textbooks to reading material, and as the fall calendar was just getting into full swing, Bishop Publishing had a big bash lined up.

"It's for all the employees at the home office," Kate was telling Kurt as she brushed some nonexistent dust off of his jacket and straightened his lapels. "I'm even bringing K. She's officially on my payroll now, by the way, so people will stop questioning me when I call her my secretary." She flattened his jacket one last time and then stood on her toes to kiss his cheek. "It was a lot of fun last year."

"Well I guess we should go try to have fun then," Kurt agreed, though he didn't look entirely convinced, especially for how much Kate was fussing over him for what she _said_ was a simple party.

She kissed him once more and grinned his way. "You're the one dating the businesswoman, sweetheart. You've had plenty of chances not to be stuck with me and this … crazy," she said, waving her hand with a teasing grin before she slid her arm through Kurt's. "Come on — we're taking a limo this time. I can't show up like the boss of my own company in a tiny purple bug."

The two of them met K on the way out of the mansion — and she looked just as well-dressed as ever, at least when it came to pretending to be Kate's 'secretary'. She'd chosen a dress that made her ring seem to sparkle that much more, as the blue was the exact same shade as the gemstones around the diamond in the center.

The two of them grinned at each other, and Kate tipped her head K's way. "I like the shoes. New?"

"Always for an event," K replied before she tipped her head at Kurt, who still looked uneasy over the whole thing. "Hey. Relax. _Sie können mit mir verstecken_."

"He's mad because I told him no inducer," Kate teased, though Kurt didn't look all that amused at her antics.

"Does that mean I'm _your_ 'secretary' tonight too?" K asked with a little smile Kurt's way.

Kurt just raised an eyebrow at her. " _Wenn du es sagst._ "

" _Ja, mache ich._ "

Kate grinned at both of them and pulled Kurt along to their waiting ride, unable to stop smiling at how protective both of them were.

The drive down to Bishop Publishing headquarters wasn't too long, but it did seem that way at times with Kate readjusting Kurt's jacket or collar every once in awhile with a thoughtful look on her face the whole time. What she hadn't told him — and what K knew — was that she was trying the look on for size… the married look. She wanted to see how her business associates would react to her soon-to-be-fiance. The last thing she needed was to find out someone at her company was going to, like, try to kill her future husband or something.

It wouldn't _stop_ her from marrying him. Obviously. But she wanted to know about any problems before they arose so she could _deal_ with them. Kurt already had it hard enough waiting for her to get her act together. She didn't want marriage to come with any other problems for him when he had been so patient with her. She wanted this to be _perfect_ for him.

When they did finally arrive at the party, Kate made it a point to grab hold of Kurt's hand and simply didn't let go the entire time they were making their way inside, so that by the time she made her triumphant entrance, there was no mistaking _who_ her date was.

The beginning of the party was marked by the usual pleasantries, which meant Kate had to talk with the heads of her different departments — marketing, acquisitions, that sort of thing — though after a few rounds of small talk, Kurt was starting to notice that Kate was stealing glances K's way to see whether or not K would shake her head after any given interaction.

Kurt tipped his head at Kate to catch her eyes for a moment after her fiction editor had left and he took a moment to smile at her. "What is it you're asking K to do?" he asked softly. "Is there some sort of problem you're trying to track down?"

"Just trying to make sure there's _not_ a problem," Kate said off-handedly. "Don't worry about it," she added as she gave him a quick peck on the cheek. "If there _is_ one, it won't be for very long."

When Kurt frowned a bit her way, K stepped a hair closer to him and tipped her head toward his shoulder so it would be close and quiet. " _Die Bedrohungen haben nicht aufgehört,"_ she half whispered. "Precautionary measures — she's thinking ahead instead of reacting."

Kurt's frown deepened, but he nodded slowly. " _Gut. Halten sie sicher_ ," he whispered back.

"Always," K said with a nod.

Kate looked between the two of them for a moment before she let out a sigh. "You two are cute when you're overprotective," she said before she threaded her arm through Kurt's.

"Then we must be adorable right now," Kurt told her as he covered her hand with his on his arm.

"Oh, very," she agreed, smiling. "So cute I'm thinking of taking you to more of these." She gave him a wicked, lopsided grin. "You just seem to enjoy them so much."

He gave her a little _look._ "If I did, I don't think you'd need your secretary to accompany you."

She laughed outright and shook her head at him. "Come on, you party pooper. There's still a few people I'd like you to meet, and then I promise we can have champagne and you can sweet talk me or something."

Kurt gave her another look but allowed her to take him through the party to speak with other members of her staff — and as always, she would look past them to K after every interaction to get either a nod or a shake of the head. And Kate was keeping track of everyone who got a 'no'. Anyone K was picking up anger from just from seeing her with Kurt? So did not need to be working for her, considering her plans for the future. She wasn't going to let anyone hurt Kurt, and she especially wasn't going to let it be for a reason as stupid as the simple fact that he wasn't human. That was just _idiotic._

There was only one instance where K didn't respond to anything one of her editors said ... except to smirk. When the conversation ended and Kate had moved on to mingle, K crossed over to Kate, put her hand on her shoulder, leaned in and whispered. "He has a crush on you. He's angry ... but … I don't think it's a problem."

Kate raised both eyebrows high and let out a little breath of a laugh before she nodded. "Yeah, that — that'll resolve itself. Thanks."

K smirked at her and shook her head. "No worries, Elf," she said as she peeked over to Kurt, who was watching the two of them with a pursed-lips kind of frown as it was clear he was starting to piece together what they were up to.

Kate was just chuckling at the expressions on both of their faces when there was a ruckus of a disturbance at the door. A group of well-dressed men was pushing its way through Kate's security and into the building, and Kate had to narrow her eyes when she recognized the man at the center of it — it was impossible _not_ to recognize Wilson Fisk, after all — as they simply pressed their way past the partygoers to make themselves at home in _her_ office.

"It's a good thing I keep everything at my home office," she muttered so low only K could hear, her eyes still narrowed.

"I think your security needs work," K said, watching the office door as several suited men stood guard outside it as if it belonged to their boss. "Maybe have your little friend in the metal suit help you out."

"I'll be sure to talk to him about it," Kate said, still frowning toward her office door.

"Do you want me to tell him to make an appointment?" K said with a smirk.

"Someone should remind him of his manners," Kate agreed with a small sort of nod. "But if he's insistent on staying, he can just _wait._ I have a party to attend to," she added, her tone obviously annoyed.

"I can inform him of what I think of his upbringing if you like."

Kate chuckled low and just shook her head. "Let's just… play by the rules. For now. Polite business brushoff if we can."

"That's easy enough. I'll go inform him of your office hours." K gave her a little smile and put on her best no-nonsense strut to let herself into the office while Kate and Kurt watched the show out of the corner of their eyes, not quite able to pretend that they were enjoying the party when they were watching out for their friend. Through the window, they could see as K brushed off the assistant that tried to talk to her first and went right up to where Fisk was sitting behind Kate's desk.

Kurt could easily see that K was smiling the whole time, though she didn't seem to blink once as she had a few brisk words. Fisk looked a bit taken aback, but after a moment, he nodded and K shot him a little smile before she left the office with a spark of trouble in her eyes.

"They all have guns. Every one of them," K said. "Not that I'm surprised."

"Yeah, doesn't surprise me either," Kate muttered darkly. "Doesn't exactly make me want to meet with him either."

"I have no problem telling him whatever you want, including advising him to shove that little weasel of an assistant up his ass. Just say the word."

Kate thought it over for a moment as she considered how to handle it. After all, not everyone knew how much of a slimeball Fisk was, and this _was_ a public party. "Did he tell you why the heck he couldn't make an appointment to talk to me? Like a civilized person? With an appointment? And no guns?" She tipped her head at the office. "Because I also have no problem telling him where to shove it."

"He tried to tell me that he was a very important person, to which I said how proud his parents must be, but that office hours are posted on the front door, and this is a private party." The words barely left her mouth when Fisk's entourage spilled out into the party. "I don't think they like me very much. Odd."

Kate smirked the slightest bit, though her eyes were narrowed as she looked over the group. "Kurt, if he tries to start anything, can you get the bamfs here to help?"

"If he tries to start anything, I can 'port you out while I assume your secretary stabs his eyes out," Kurt replied.

"Accurate description of events," K agreed.

"I meant for the guests," Kate said, though she was chuckling at both of them.

"They'll run," K promised. "Once they see the arsenal I'm hiding in my arms."

Kate let out a sigh and then nodded as she took Kurt's arm. "Come on, sweetheart, let's see what the impatient little twat — I mean, _very important person_ — wants, shall we?" With that, rather than wait for Fisk to bully his way over to her, she strode over with a slowly gathering, practiced business smile that Kurt had seen her use on JJ on television.

"This party is for employees and their families only, Mr. Fisk," she said coolly as she arrived close enough to his rather large influence of gravity that it would be considered a private conversation without getting any closer than she had to. "Unless you're looking to join the family?" She tipped her head at him. "We do have an HR department if you'd like to leave your application when they open on Monday morning. I know times are hard, but surely one weekend isn't too long to wait for a job option."

"Very humorous, Miss Bishop, but I think you'll find that I only need to take a moment of your time," Fisk said brusquely. "If we could just share a _private word_." He glanced toward Kurt and then K, who was smiling up at him and looking perfectly relaxed. "I'm afraid this matter is pressing."

"If you wanted to speak to me in private, you only needed to make an appointment," Kate said sweetly. "But we must have different definitions of privacy if the number of your… assistants are any indication."

K leaned toward Kate and stage whispered so that she was sure Fisk heard her. "For such a pressing matter, there is no record anywhere of any attempt from any of _Mr. Fisk's_ associates contacting you until just now." She turned Fisk's way. "Thursday next, 11:30 work for you?"

Fisk openly glared at her as K smiled sweetly up at him. "Be that as it may, it's still quite important that we share a word."

Kate crossed her arms for a moment. "As you just heard from my secretary, my schedule's full. It's the school season — busy time for publishing. And I _don't_ take well to meetings under a gun," she said pointedly.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "I'm sure you've found the need for increased security," Fisk said. "My associates mean no harm while they do their jobs." K quickly covered her mouth with her hand to hide the little laugh that tried to escape her as she shook her head.

"Yes, it seems you've reminded me why I'll be tripling my security division," Kate said with a thoughtful look around. "Though I do hire the best. It takes some time to sort through the roughage." She gave him a glance for a long moment. "If you want privacy, Mr. Fisk, I'd be willing to talk. But if you want me to leave _my_ associates behind, yours will have to leave too. I don't do lopsided business deals."

"I can go along with that — though _my_ assistant, Wesley, is a bit overprotective about sticking close," Fisk said, indicating the slight man beside him, who looked down his nose at the entire group of them.

"Then my secretary will insist on staying as well. With my being a young woman in this business and all, she's a bit worried about my being alone," Kate said just as easily.

"Of course," Fisk said with a practiced smile. "With the attempts that have been made lately, I understand perfectly."

Kate glared at him for a moment and then made it a point to kiss Kurt on the cheek. "Won't you entertain the guests for a while, darling? I'll only be a while," she said in her best, airiest voice.

"Of course, _liebling_ ," Kurt replied calmly, though the very tip of his tail was switching. "I'll be waiting for you."

"Won't be long," she promised again. "Do tell our friends why I was delayed so they don't go spreading rumors of my untimely demise again. They're so worried sometimes." With that, she strode past Fisk toward her office. "I believe you know the way," she said as she passed him without really looking at him, K just behind her with that same sweet smile.

When they got into the office — after Wesley had held the door for the two women and pulled the blinds in the office — Fisk wasted no more time with pleasantries. His expression changed into a harder one, as did his tone as he leaned toward Kate. "You must know that my company had some ongoing interests in this company when your father was running it. It is my intention to strengthen those ties."

"It's a very different company now from the one my father ran," Kate said with a frown — since if Fisk wasn't going to bother with business smiles, she sure wasn't going to either. "And my lawyers have been through my records thoroughly to make sure _my_ interests are represented — not my father's. I'm sorry you lost a business partner, but I lost a _parent,_ so your 'interests' don't really seem to hold much weight in comparison."

He looked as if he was trying to hold back his anger as he spoke between clenched teeth. "You misunderstand, Miss Bishop. This new direction you're taking is causing problems. I can't allow you to continue down this path. I won't let you drag this company that I helped to build into the dirt."

She didn't drop his gaze and in fact drew herself up a little taller. "You and I must be seeing different numbers. Sales have never been better, marketing is through the roof—"

"It's not the numbers," Fisk growled.

Kate narrowed her eyes at him. "I'm well aware of what _your_ problem is. But I guess giving you a polite way out of admitting to being a total _bigot_ just isn't how things are done anymore."

"What you do still reflects on the ties that I had with Bishop Publishing," Fisk said evenly, though it was clear he was getting angrier with every word. "I won't be lumped up with your little ... _side interests._ "

"You have no legal say in what I do with _my_ company," Kate said, her eyes flashing. "And you know it."

"Then I suppose I'll need to appeal to your more delicate sensibilities," Fisk replied sharply.

"You'll find I'm not as delicate as you seem to think," she shot back, her voice raising.

"Apparently not," he replied before he leaned forward and his voice dropped dangerously low. "Are your affairs in order, Miss Bishop? The world is a dangerous place."

Now it was Kate's turn to look as though she was barely keeping her own anger in check, and she clenched her fists at her sides. The attempt on her life back in New Orleans was still fresh in her mind, still in the back of her dreams, and a death threat, even implied — from someone she _knew_ would follow it through — had her usually eloquent sass temporarily dried up.

"What happens, Mr. Fisk," K interrupted, stepping in when she clearly could see that Kate had been dealt an emotional blow and needed the cover. "If something were to happen to _you_ , I wonder? Are _your_ affairs in order?"

"I'm sure Mr. Fisk has done what all of us in the business world do — beef up security and keep our lawyers on speed dial," Kate said through her teeth.

"I think he believes himself above that," K said as she made her way over to Kate, a physical show of solidarity on top of everything else.

"Yes, well, my father thought that way as well," Kate said, waving her hand casually but with steel to her tone. "But I learned from his mistakes. You can never be too careful."

At that, both Fisk and Wesley looked at the two women with a bit of a frown. "Indeed," Fisk said.

Kate smirked at him for a moment and then stood from behind her desk. "Thank you for your obvious concern for my well-being, but I have an event to attend to," she said. "As you pointed out, I _am_ taking my company in a new direction, and that needs a little attention."

"I'd be happy to show you out if you think you may get lost," K offered with a hard grin.

Wesley frowned hard her way before Fisk declined, remembering his manners suddenly, though he fell short of offering Kate his hand to shake. "I'll be in touch, Miss Bishop."

"You know the number of my office," Kate replied with a practiced near-smile and a nod.

Wesley held the door for the two women again before both he and Fisk rejoined the entourage, both of them with practiced 'public' expressions that didn't quite hide the frown as K and Kate rejoined Kurt, whose tail was still switching, even if he did look slightly more relaxed on seeing the two of them emerge from the office — and even more relaxed when Fisk and the men he'd brought with him finally left the building.

"K, I think I'm going to call Tony after all, see who he recommends for security detail," Kate said softly as soon as Fisk's men had left. "And then maybe talk to Matt Murdock, make sure we're ready in case he tries to make a move on my board or my assets some other way."

K was still glaring toward the elevator as Kurt put a hand on Kate's arm. " _Was wollte er_?" he asked quietly.

Kate frowned hard for a moment and then let out a breath. "To remind me that he used to own my dad, and that he'd like to either own me or replace me with someone he _does_ own," she said in his ear, low enough that the other guests couldn't hear, though it was clear that the party was more or less over, as many of them were shaken, and several had left after the showdown.

Kurt frowned as he looked over Kate — taking in how upset she looked as well as the way K was still sticking close to her. "Perhaps it's time to call it a night," he said very gently as he pulled her a little closer to him.

"Yes, I think so," she agreed, leaning her head on his arm.

"Do you two want the limo to yourselves?" K asked with an unreadable look on her face. "I can find my own way back if need be."

"Or we could always take the fast way and let you have all that space to stretch out," Kate teased lightly without looking her way.

"I can stretch out without the limo," K assured her with a smirk.

Kate just grinned and nodded before she wrapped her arms around Kurt's middle. "Come on, Kurt. Let's go home. I'll ask the driver to go slow. I'm tired."

"Of course," he said, kissing the top of her head as he pulled her a little tighter to him.

"Tell Logan I won't be too long," K called out their way as she gave them a little wave and slipped off, only to disappear into the crowd.

"Remind me to give her a raise," Kate said with a little smirk, still with her head on Kurt's shouder before he simply teleported the two of them into the limo, deciding that enough was enough with the public appearances when Kate was clearly _done_.

"Are you sure you're alright, _liebling_?" he asked gently as she just seemed to melt that much more into his shoulder and wrap her arms around him that much tighter once they were out of scrutiny.

"I'm just tired," she promised as she tipped her head back to steal a kiss.

"Well then. We should get you home… perhaps find some ice cream…" He trailed off when that got a solid smile out of her, and she snuggled into him.

"I've mentioned how much I love you, right?" she whispered.

"Oh, perhaps a time or two," he said lightly.

"Well, I do," she said.

"I know," he replied as he lifted her chin with the knuckle of one hand to bring her mouth to his, and the two of them fell into a much less talkative — and much more efficient — form of communication.

But while Kurt and Kate were headed back to Westchester, K was discreetly tailing Fisk and his men. She'd taken off her heels and was rushing behind them silently, sticking to the dark shadows in alleyways and between buildings. The further she got, the more she was frowning to herself, since they weren't headed anywhere near Fisk's office building. But there she was anyhow — going into one of the older areas of the city that still had brownstones up and down the block.

When the caravan of black cars got caught up in traffic, K rushed up a fire escape — her shoes discarded in a dumpster so she could keep her hands as free as possible while she climbed. It was a good move, too, since not five seconds after she reached the top of the building, Fisk's men got out of one of the cars and did a quick security sweep of the area before loading up and driving off again with traffic.

She kept after them at a run — leaping the small spaces between buildings as she did so, all the way until he made a right turn, which had K thanking the gods that be. She watched from the edge of the rooftop as Fisk finally got out of the car and headed into a building two blocks further down.

She didn't hesitate to climb back down. Gaps between buildings she could handle — jumping across entire streets, not so much.

Again, she was aware of the men Fisk had brought with him — though the scent of gun oil was heavy in the air anyhow in this area. She frowned to herself, wondering why the hell that would be the case, but continued on anyhow. When she got to Fisk's building — she was irritated to see that there was no fire escape there.

"Figures. Can't keep up with codes," she muttered to herself before she simply started to scale the dark side of the building using mostly sills and gaps in the bricks. She was grumbling to herself at the fact that she'd likely have to scale at least another wall to find out where they were, but halfway up, she was joined by someone else that nearly had her shouting.

"What are you doing here? In a dress? On the side of a building? Is this some weird kind of date night …. No. Nevermind. I don't want to know the details? Just … why are you here? Wall-scaling's my thing, remember?" The friendly neighborhood wallcrawler asked from a few feet above her head, stuck to the wall and facing downward.

"I'm following Wilson Fisk. I am not trying to horn in on your game," K told him, and that got Spidey to perk up.

"Oh, really? That … sounds … _why_ would you do that?"

"Because he was creeping on Kate and threatening her business, so … here I am," she replied, only slightly annoyed by his antics.

He was nodding his head to himself and had sat back on his heels, chin in his hand. "Uh-huh, uh-huh, I can see now why you'd go after him. But is this your new hero suit? Because I gotta tell you, we really don't have enough girls in skirts for hero suits? And it might do the X-Men some good at this point if—"

"Hey. Focus," K said, wondering why she'd climbed the building again at this point. "Can you check the other walls for which room the guy went into? I got this one."

"Oh. Sure! Why didn't you say so?" Peter said brightly before swinging down the alley to look around the building.

K shook her head and started upward again, finally pausing when she heard a familiar voice. She didn't know where they were in that floor — they very well could have been on the other side, but Fisk's angry, booming tone was unmistakable. She looked around her and found a better grip to pull herself up a little further, peeking in the window just enough to see that it was heavily curtained and filled with candlelight when her phone buzzed insistently.

She startled and very nearly let go, knowing that it would continue. She took one hand off of the wall and carefully dropped her head out of sight to answer it in a whispered. "What do you want?"

" _Where the hell are you?"_ Scott asked from the other end. " _I thought you knew better than to run off and follow a wild lead without backup."_

He continued along that same thread for a minute or two, but K had bigger problems as one of the men in the room was headed her way. She looked down and knew she didn't have a good way to hide on the open wall. And before the guy got to the window, she made her decision to just let go. She'd be fine. More or less.

She'd barely let go of the wall when someone grabbed her.

"You really shouldn't try wall crawling without the right equipment," Peter said as he swung her a few blocks away from Fisk.

" _Is that Spider-Man?"_ Scott asked a second or two after Peter had spoken.

"Yes. Yes it is," K replied, letting out a little breath of relief. Two birds with one stone, as it were.

"Is that Logan?" Peter asked before he sang out a cheerful "Hi, Logan!" that had K smiling widely at him.

"No, it's Scott," she told him before she turned her attention back to the call. "You really need to relax. I was just getting to the good stuff when you called and tanked my scouting mission."

" _I wouldn't have called if you'd have told someone what you were up to. All Kurt and Kate had to say was that you were following Kingpin. Which_ — _I have to tell you…."_

"I know. I won't do it alone. Thanks, Scott. Tell Logan I'll be there in a little bit. Spidey's going to help me find a ride."


	13. Return of The Moonlighting Secretary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The girls get a little time to relax with their men. They come back well rested, sassy, and ready to get back to work ... if not for that pesky Avengers Exchange.

**Chapter 13: "Return of the Moonlighting Secretary"**

* * *

Once the school year got into a good swing, it was harder to disappear when Annie had perfected the look of _betrayal_ if you wanted to leave during the weekdays. She would just look upset and then, depending on her mood that day, might even start to cry. And none of them could handle the crying pregnant lady begging them not to abandon the school… so it was very, _very_ difficult to leave.

Which of course, only meant that half the teachers were gone on the weekends, when it was safe — and that was the plan as the end of September rolled around and Annie got it out of K that it was her birthday. Which was the perfect excuse to get out of the house for a while — Annie even insisted on it.

K was in fairly good spirits, even though she said that she just wasn't used to having much company at the cottage. It was one thing to lend it out, another to be there with them. But Kate and Kurt were hard to say no to when they insisted that they wanted to celebrate with her, and when they got to the little cottage perched high over the big lake, the scene was perfectly beautiful.

What wasn't evergreens around the cottage was bright, golden yellow as the forest was in full color. The ferns had all died off, and the whole feel of the place was that of a primordial forest with wet leaves and soft ground.

The four of them settled in quickly — though Logan seemed to take it on as his job to make sure the fire in the wood burner was hot while K gave Kate the more official 'tour'. It was a small enough little place, with one bedroom downstairs and two up, though one had the walls lined with boxes and a tall mahogany wardrobe. "Poke around," K told her when they got to the room full of stuff. "Make yourself at home."

Kate grinned at her. "My fashion director friend," she said fondly as she looked over the room.

"Good stuff is in the wardrobe," K told her. "The boxes ... touch and go. Few warm coats and sweaters. Some rodeo winnings. Nothing exciting outside of that."

"We'll see," Kate said with a smirk before she peeked her head into the wardrobe — and K could see her expression change even before she turned around just by the way Kate was holding her shoulders.

"Should I leave you two alone?" K asked.

Kate laughed and spun around with a sparkle in her eyes. "K, it is a _crime_ against, like, humanity or something that there's no reason to wear these."

"Not too many occasions I can think of that call for vintage Coco."

"It's _gorgeous_." Kate turned back to run a very careful hand over the edge of the fireworks designs. "It… it needs to be worn."

K walked over to pull on the skirt a bit. "Hand stitched, every inch of it. They thought the war was only going to take six months. Everyone was partying like it was … a speedbump. This was from just before all hell broke loose."

"It's… we need to find a reason," Kate said thoughtfully. "Seriously. It needs… a chandelier and a big ball and... " She broke into a grin. "Hey, we haven't planned the Halloween bash yet!" She spun on her heel to look at K. "Masquerade. What do you think?"

"It's been a long time, I doubt it would fit me anymore," she replied.

"There are other things in here… I could have a replica made…" Kate was grinning ear to ear. "It would be gorgeous. Whatever you wore — just… _any_ of this stuff, really, but… Seriously, K. You'd kill Logan dead if you showed up in something like this. Just dead."

"He does like silk," she said with a little nod. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to try a few on and see if it's worth looking into. I might have to cut my hair, though."

Kate tipped her head at her for a moment. "I have a good friend who knows how to pin it up just right so it _looks_ shorter if you want."

"No. This — to wear this one right, you should have short hair," K said before she pulled another one forward. "This would work with an updo though. Different years. Different styles."

Kate's grin was threatening to break her face. "Ooh, yes. I think you and I are going to have to try a few of these on. For… planning purposes, obviously."

"Okay, when do you want to do that?" K asked as she looked up at Kate.

"No time like the present," she teased. "I'm sure the guys are totally content downstairs."

"Likely," K agreed. "Alright. Can you help me zip then?"

"If you help me," Kate agreed, all but dancing in place with excitement.

With that, the two of them pulled out a few top choices and started to play, though K was sure to kick a little wooden box over in front of the mirror so they could stand on it and get a better look at how the longer ones would look once the shoes were dealt with.

By the time they were finished, Kate had fallen in love with a classically black number that looked like something that had fallen off of the silver screen. Sleeveless with ruffled lace at the neckline and all along the skirt. It would need some minor adjustments to it, but K didn't hesitate to wave it off and simply give it to her.

K on the other hand, tried to laugh it off when Kate pressed her to put on the shimmering sequin and silk that she'd gone straight to after opening the wardrobe, but once she caved and put it on, it was pretty clear that there wasn't a thing wrong with the fit. "I guess this will work then," K said quietly.

"See? I'm just right about these things. You should trust me more," Kate teased with a grin as she draped an arm over K's shoulders.

"Alright — I guess let's just put them away and see what trouble the boys are into."

Kate nodded her agreement, though as the two of them were getting back into their more usual outfits, she had to shoot a grin over her shoulder. "You know, however many years from now when you _do_ get married, I want to help dress shop."

K laughed it off immediately. "There are no designers worth a damn anymore," she said with a shake of her head. "Fashion is dead."

"You tell me what you want, and I'll have it custom-made," Kate insisted.

"If and when that ever happens, I'm sure it'll be a quiet no-nonsense affair," K said.

"And you should still look stunning. I don't care if it's just for an hour for the paper signing. You should look stunning," Kate insisted.

"I guess we'll cross that bridge when we get there," she said with a smirk. "Have to hire a crack team of professionals to get me presentable."

Kate just laughed and shook her head at K as she pulled on her purple jacket. "You'd better get married before I die, K, or I'll come back and haunt you."

"Like you're the first to make that threat," K said.

"Am I the first to make that threat while you're wearing a ring?" Kate asked with a smirk. "I feel like I have more material."

"You … have more material, yeah," K admitted as she smoothed her sweater over her jeans. "First time for everything, I suppose."

Kate put on her most teasing grin. "Better hurry, then. I hear there's people who want to kill me, and if that happens before the wedding, expect the world's first purple ghost."

K just shook her head at her. "Let's see what trouble the boys have found. They've been alone now for all of what ... two hours? I'm surprised the house isn't on fire."

"They probably drank everything in the house; I'm sorry," Kate chuckled.

"Then they should be easy to take advantage of," K said with a grin. "Or … easier."

"Like we need help in that regard." Kate pulled open the door with a little laugh and gestured for K. "After you, birthday girl."

"Ridiculous," K said as she walked ahead of Kate, though they hit the stairs together to find the guys outside on the deck, leaning on the railing and apparently watching the wildlife on the lake. "You were wrong. I was expecting liquored-up boys. They're probably gossiping. You know how _men_ are about that."

"Well, I can't be right _all_ the time. That would be exhausting," Kate teased, gesturing for K to lead the way out to the boys.

They slipped outside, to be greeted with smiles when they got up to Logan and Kurt. "Kate has an idea for Halloween," K said as she slipped in between Logan and the railing. "She wants to wear very old dresses, for some reason."

"Very old, very _vintage_ dresses," Kate corrected her with a grin before she wrapped her arms around Kurt's waist to explain, "Masquerade. What do you think?"

"A masquerade ball?" Kurt said with a bit of surprise. "I don't believe we've ever done that."

"She just found a little dusty old couture and can't help but look for an excuse," K said with a wave.

"Come on. Tell me it wouldn't be _so_ fun," Kate said as she reached up to fix an imaginary jacket collar at Kurt's neck. "You'd look dapper, I'd look stunning, we'd be the envy of all."

"If you can find someone skilled enough not to shred that dress," K pointed out.

"Oh ye of little faith."

"Very little."

Kate just laughed. "I'll go to the same one I used for my last couple bridesmaid dresses. She's sweet, she's old, and she's a friend of the couple I lived with in LA. Very good tastes, those two."

"Good," K said. "As long as you have someone worthwhile."

"Of course!" Kate sounded slightly offended. "I wouldn't wreck a work of art."

K looked at the confused looks on the guys' faces and smirked as she caught Kurt's eye. "Old, dead designer. Used to be a big deal years ago." She looked at Kate again. "Did you see the old suit in there?"

"Oh, way too tall for Logan," Kate teased.

"I meant _my_ old suit, you goofball."

Kate just grinned wider and nodded. "You have good tastes."

"It's settled then," Kurt said, smiling widely at the two girls and their antics. "A masquerade ball. How proper will this be?"

"For the teachers? All out." Kate grinned up at him. "I expect coattails. The students can do what they want, but _you_ , mister… I need to see you in full character."

"Naturally," he said with a little laugh before he pulled her into a long kiss. "I can't believe you would expect anything less."

"Oh never," she agreed in a low murmur as she pulled on his neck to kiss him again.

* * *

When the four X-Men who'd spent the weekend at K's cottage arrived back at the mansion, Kate was in full planning mode for the masquerade — decorations, costumes, masks, everything — and simply tried to breeze by Scott when he tried to stop them in the halls. She simply waved at him and skirted around him, and he let out a long sigh and put a hand on her shoulder as she passed to stop her.

"You and K are up on the rotation schedule," he told her. "Neither of you signed up, so you're the last slot together."

Kate blinked at him in cheery surprise. "I figured, you know, since I _was_ an Avenger and all right before I was an X-Man, I didn't _need_ the outreach," she pointed out.

"Logan was an Avenger, and he took a turn — all of us are taking a rotation," he said. "All of us."

Kate puffed out the breath in her cheeks and sighed. "Alright, _fine_ ," she said. "I'll go say hi to Cap and Clint and play nice for five minutes, okay?"

"Two weeks," Scott corrected. "You can come back at night if you want, but you're on call for them."

"Oh, good, glad to hear it won't cramp my style," Kate said with her best serious expression, meeting Scott's gaze. She couldn't quite hold it and broke into a little grin anyway.

"The fun part is that you get to make sure K doesn't stab anyone," Scott said with a little smirk. "Good luck."

Kate rolled her eyes for a moment but didn't argue any further, and by the time she and K drove down to the Avengers mansion later that day, she'd already decided this was going to be fun anyway, if nothing else so that she could mess with Cap — it had been a while since she did that.

Cap and Thor were the ones to greet her at the door, and while Kate got a warm smile from Cap, it was clear he was trying to figure out why K was there as the two of them watched the girls come up the lawn.

"I like our partners," K said to Kate with a soft smirk as she looked over both of the tall blondes. "Why did Scott try to make it sound like this was going to be horrible again?"

"Because sometimes even these gorgeous examples of eye candy are _annoying_ ," Kate said, shaking her head.

"Lies," K said at a low whisper. "Vicious, vicious lies."

"Yeah, Logan clearly hasn't told you my backstory. I'll have to tell you about how Cap tried to lock my teammates up and keep us from being superheroes."

"Well that was rude of him," K said with a frown. "And not at all like Captain Freedom-pants is supposed to be."

"Well, he's an idiot. What are you gonna do?" Kate said, smirking.

"He is a man. Of course he's an idiot."

Kate just laughed and shook her head at K before she strode the last few feet to where Cap and Thor were and threw her arms around Cap's neck in a hug. "Miss me?" she teased him.

He returned the hug with a smirk. "I hear you're doing just fine on your own, Kate," he replied before he looked over her shoulder at K. "And this is…?"

"Last X-Man standing," K said quietly. "Apparently. You can call me K."

Cap extended his hand for her to shake. "Captain America. And this is Thor," he said as the tall Asgardian grinned and offered his own hand.

"I've not seen you around the field of battle before," Thor said warmly. "Are you the newest to the ranks of the X-Men, then?"

"I am," K said with a smirk before she shook both of their hands. "Pleasure to meet you both."

Kate pulled on Cap's arm as she tried to get his attention. "Come on. You're supposed to give us the run-down or something. The Life of an Avenger or whatever the heck you do when we do these exchanges. Not that I need the footnotes."

Cap chuckled and shook his head at her. "Well, we've made a few changes in the roster since you were on the team," he pointed out. "I know you already know Kamala — there's a few others closer to your age that you'd probably like to meet."

"You act like we don't already meet up at parties and raves," Kate teased. "That's what us young people do, old man. We party."

"You should invite your handsome Avenger friends to your next 'rave'," K said. "I think they're old enough to enjoy it."

"Ooh, yes." Kate spun on her heel to better face Cap. "We're throwing a masquerade on Halloween at the mansion. Full costumes, 1930's-inspired. You'd _love_ it!"

"She even got a consultant to make sure it's authentic," K added.

Cap started to grin at the two of them and their antics despite himself. "That does sound like fun," he agreed. "Is it invitation-only?"

"If it was, you were just invited," K replied.

Cap grinned at her even wider. "Good point," he said as they got deeper into the mansion, headed for one of the training rooms. Once they arrived, he gestured into the room and turned toward both of them, still smiling but a little more business-like. "Just thought we'd do a little sparring, see what you ladies can do so we can figure you into our team for the next two weeks."

K glanced between the two men and Kate before she shrugged lightly, though Kate was grinning wide. "C'mon, Steve, you've seen me fight," she teased. "You don't need me to kick your butt again."

"Yeah, but I haven't seen you fight in a long time and I know Logan's been working with you." Cap gave her his very best grin. "Unless you're afraid you'll lose."

"Oh, that is just _not_ the case." Kate grinned over at Thor. "Hey, big guy, make sure the cameras in this room are rolling when I wipe the floor with Captain America, huh?" She stretched out her arms and hands to make her point as Cap chuckled at her display.

Thor just smiled at her. "I'm sure it will be something worth watching again." He tipped his head for K to follow him, and she gave Kate a little wave and a wink as she disappeared with him to the booth.

The observation booth wasn't too terribly different than what the X-Men had — a lot of the tech was the same, but that was likely to be expected, all things considered. Still, K stood at the window to watch at just a bit above ground level while Kate and Steve went into a well-practiced hand-to-hand fight. Both of them were holding up well enough and throwing good hits, though no weapons came into play as they got more and more competitive.

There were a few instances where it was clear that Cap was taken off-balance by how well Kate had been paying attention to her hand-to-hand teacher, and partway through, as Kate let out a shrieking laugh at a near miss, Stark poked his head in the booth.

"I wasn't aware secretaries were allowed this deeply in the mansion," Stark said with a frown.

K looked over her shoulder at him with a bored expression on her face as she gave him the once over. "I was moonlighting," she replied before turning her attention back to the fight below. Just then, Kate pulled off a move that she'd been working on with K, and for a few seconds, she had Cap pinned flat on his back. "Atta girl," K muttered.

But in a flash, Cap was back up, and the grin on Kate's face was to the point of being illegal as they went back to fighting.

"So which one is it? X-Man moonlighting as a secretary, or secretary moonlighting as an X-Man?" Tony asked as he slid up closer to watch the fight — and K.

"The first, I suppose," she replied, still smirking while Kate dodged a punch and popped up next to Cap to catch his other hand and yank it behind his back. She tried to get him to the ground again — but the leverage was wrong, and a moment later she was trying to avoid him catching her in a similar pin. "I'm pretty crummy for typing and shorthand."

Tony grinned widely. "Maybe, but from what my security tells me, you're good for intimidation and, somehow, easy on the eyes at the same time. You trying to steal my best men?" he teased.

She turned to him with a broad grin. "Who would I steal?" she asked earnestly. "And for what purposes?" A shout echoed from the room next door, and again Cap was on the ground, but Kate didn't get the pin before he pulled her ankle out from under her and moved to pin her down, this time getting her solidly as she squirmed around and tried unsuccessfully to get out.

He gave her a broader grin, if it was possible. "Well they might have had a few ideas, but I told them they were thinking too small."

"Well I _am_ kinda small… you still didn't tell me who," K replied as Kate finally tapped out.

"Maybe I don't want you stealing them," he laughed. "Maybe I'd like to vet you first before I let them go running off with some strange secretary."

"I promise not to steal your best men. Or even your second best men," K said with a laugh.

He had a dramatic look of disappointment on his face. "And here I was all set for a thorough, _thorough_ vetting process."

"You're not up to that," she countered. "And that's not how I'd do my assassinations."

"Not a bad way to go," he replied, grinning.

She just laughed at him as Kate and Cap came up to the booth, with Kate already asking for the footage. "Nice job with that pin, Hawkeye," K said to her.

"Had a good teacher," she countered with a smirk as a positively grinning Thor waved her over to replay the pin for her. "You been playing nice up here?"

"Of course," K said with a laugh. "I always play nice."

Kate just grinned over her shoulder. "Is that so? Well, who do you want to spar?" she asked with a wicked grin in her eyes. "I think Cap's all tired out, but Tony over there looks like he wants to get his butt handed to him."

"I don't want to break him," K said. "So delicate. _Han är så flörtig, det är lustiga._ " At that, Thor broke out into quiet laughter as he nodded his head. "I could always play with Nat or Clint if they're free."

"Woah, hey, I'm not _nearly_ as breakable as Barton," Tony said, looking downright insulted.

"Without your armor you are, and Clint is pretty good at taking a hit," K replied, though that assessment just had Tony looking even more incredulous at her before he finally threw his hands up in the air.

"What makes you think I'd need my armor?" Tony challenged, but at that, K took a few steps closer to rest a hand on his shoulder with a broad, amused smile.

"You'd need your armor," she told him in a low, smoky tone.

"What is it you _do_?" Tony asked, his head tipped to the side. "I was having a little trouble tacking that down, exactly."

"I do all kinds of things," K said with a wave, dismissing him entirely as he turned toward Steve. "I could fight Thor if he doesn't have issues fighting a woman."

"I have no such issues," Thor said, still laughing. "Not when many of my warriors in arms have long laid to rest such debate."

"Excellent," K said with a nod. The two of them headed off to the room, leaving Tony frowning after them, arms crossed as he watched at the window.

"Did the tiny mutant hurt your feelings?" Kate teased as she unscrewed the cap of a water bottle.

"What's her ability anyhow?" Tony asked as he frowned down at the two heroes in the booth. Both of them were going back and forth speaking rapidly in Swedish as they warmed up a bit. "And what's with the secret Thor-language?"

"It's a long story. She's a Viking. Apparently." Kate chuckled at the joke and then shook her head as she patted Tony's shoulder. "She heals, Tony. That's why I bring her around when I go poke the bear when it comes to JJ and hate speech and all that. She heals and she fights _well_."

Tony raised both eyebrows high before he turned back to watch the fight and let out a sigh. "Not fair you guys get two of them then," he said. "Healers."

Down below, with a huge grin, K had slipped under Thor's swing to pop up and crack him in the jaw before bouncing backward and waiting for him to come to her. He just laughed and nodded before saying something that no one in the booth caught, and the fight started to intensify.

He'd get in a hit, but before he could pin her, she'd slip away and try to take advantage to pin him — but even when it was a solid pin — she was far too small to make it stick against him. Thor finally managed to get a hold of her long enough to pin, but as Cap moved to call the fight, she squirmed out from under him and grabbed a hold of his ponytail as she climbed up on his back. She rested her arm on his shoulder so her fist was beyond his head before she popped a claw and whispered something in his ear that got a broad smile and a tap out.

When they got back to the booth, both of them were laughing and again chattering in rapid-fire Swedish until Cap interrupted. "Alright, I think I know where I can put both of you in a fight," Cap said, lightly frowning K's way as he shook his head. He clearly hadn't expected the display — or the powers.

"Yeah, just step back and let us do everything," Kate agreed with a wide smile. "Thor can come too — I think he's having a blast."

Thor nodded in vigorous agreement. "We should keep them both," he said, beaming as he clapped a hand on K's shoulder in obvious delight over his newfound friend.

"That'll be a change. Us stealing theirs instead of these two stealing ours," Tony said with a soft smirk K's way.

"Well maybe if you make me an irresistible offer," K teased with her arms crossed.

"He's just sore that you called him delicate," Kate laughed. "You know. _Delicate_ male ego. You crushed him, K. So rude."

" _Så skör_ ," K agreed. "But it would have made a bad impression for little me to break Iron Man on the first day." She looked Tony's way and tipped her head to the side. "Maybe the second. We can re-evaluate that tomorrow if you still wanna play."

"You missed your shot," Tony countered with a small smile. "Now I know what you can do — today you would have caught me off my game."

"I'd prefer you brought your whole game — top shelf, or I don't want to play with you."

"I think if you stick around, you'll see I always bring my A game."

"Then you need to work on it," she said with a little laugh.

"Maybe I just need private lessons," Tony countered.

"I'm sorry, I don't know any remedial tutors."

Kate was giggling madly as she leaned over to tap Tony on the shoulder and give him an out before he unknowingly dug himself into a deep, deep grave. "See the ring? Wanna know who bought it? Because she can pin him too." Kate grinned over at K. "I mean. I thought Logan was good, but she can take him _down_."

"I didn't know Logan was getting married," Cap said with a smile, pushing past Tony's totally gobsmacked expression. "Congratulations. When's the big day? I'm assuming you haven't set one yet — or I'd have gotten an invitation — but do you have an idea?"

"No, we haven't even narrowed it down," K said, laughing to herself that Steve was just as excited as Annie. "I'm sure you're at the top of his list — he speaks highly of you."

"You'll have to tell me how you two met," Cap said, the smile getting warmer. "Why don't you both come upstairs? We'll grab some food and get to know each other a little better."

"That's my line," Tony complained, getting a dry look from Steve and a laugh from K.

"Lead the way," K said with a little nod, and the group left, with Tony frowning after them for a moment before he rushed to catch up.

The conversation was easy and light — and Cap asked questions along the way that K tried to answer as plainly as possible, though Kate made a point to step in and elaborate when she deemed it necessary. After all, K had Logan's habit of not giving the _juicy_ stuff when it came to stories.

As the discussion came to a close, Cap had to grin, clearly enjoying himself and pleased to hear that his old friend had found someone who suited him as well as K clearly did. "Well if there's anything we can do to make life easier, just say the word," Steve said. "It's been a rough enough road for everyone already."

K smirked and turned her head toward Kate for a moment. "Actually - there may be," she said easily. "I've been training to take down the little bitch for a while now, and although I'm making progress—" She gestured down to herself. "—my size still means I need an equalizer. Who would I talk to about coming up with something like a suped-up Widow Bite? Something small but big enough to take down a mountain of a healer."

Seeing the look on Cap's face as he tried to work out what K was talking about, Kate chuckled and said, "Sabretooth. She means Sabretooth."

"I said what I meant, _Katherine_ ," K said. "And I _mean_ he's a little bitch."

"Well, if you're looking for weapon design, Stark's the expert," Cap said, tipping his head Tony's way.

"What do you say, brown eyes? Wanna help me out?" K asked.

Tony had to smirk the slightest bit as he rubbed his hands together. "A challenge, hm?" He smirked wider. "Well, you've come to the right place. Let me show you the workshop."

"As long as that's not some kind of euphemism, then I'll happily follow you."

"He really does have a workshop, but when you leave the kitchen, make sure he turns _left_ ," Kate whispered low.

"I think I can take him if there's a problem," K said just as quietly.

Kate snorted and nodded her agreement before she waved her fingers at K. "Have fun. No stabbing anyone on the first day."

"That's my only restriction?" K said, brightening up substantially. "Excellent." Kate shook her head at her as she disappeared with Stark..

The workshop was bright and open, and there was music running at a low level when they walked through the doors. Lots of advanced technology lined the tables and counters in varying stages of repair, but Tony went right to work on a hologram drafting table.

He immediately started in on a few notes, figuring out what might do the trick, asking short questions here and there as he made his notations and compared them to the most recent intel on Creed. K crossed her arms and watched him work until he waved her over.

"C'mere, c'mere," he said quickly as he motioned rapidly. "Right or left?" he asked. It took K a moment to realize what he was getting at.

"I'm right-handed," she said, and he smiled, took a hold of her arm, and led her forward to the center of a bunch of techy-looking stuff.

"Don't move. Taking measurements," he said before he stepped back. She stood still and didn't say anything until she realized it wasn't just her arm he was scanning. "Scientific purposes. Come on. Just hold still a minute longer."

She let out a huff and waited until he clapped his hands together and stepped forward to get back to work. "Okay. Thank you," Tony said. "I'll let you know when I'm done."

"Is that what you tell all the girls?" She teased automatically, then frowned at him for a moment. "Are you sure you don't need anything else?" she asked, but he shook his head.

"Nope, got everything I need — you answered all my questions and I have your requests and measurements ... we're good." He stopped what he was doing just long enough to turn and give her a grin. "Really, thanks. I kinda needed a project."

K met his gaze and allowed a real smile to grace her features. "Thank you," she said earnestly before she took out a piece of paper and carefully wrote on it. "Call me when you're done." He looked shocked for a moment before he shot her a broad grin.

"I'm gonna use that, you know," he said.

She just nodded. "Yes, you are." She took a few steps backward before she turned on her heel and headed back to where she'd last seen Kate.

* * *

_**Translations from Swedish:** _

_Han är så flörtig, det är lustiga. - He's so flirty, it's funny._

_Så skör - so fragile_


	14. Chicken Hawk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Behold! A Halloween Masquerade Ball where everyone looks fabulous and Kate does a stupendous imitation of a Chicken Hawk!

K and Kate had spent the last couple of hours prepping for the masquerade ball that Kate had pulled together. It was strangely advantageous that they'd been in the city for two weeks with the Avengers, since it made coordinating the party that much easier. But now, it was time to finish their preparations, and Kate was giddy with anticipation — for the time being anyhow. She was alternating between that and sheer terror at any given moment, if she was being honest with herself.

"Kate, I could use a hand," K called out from behind the dressing screen that she'd set up in Kate's room. The guys were using Logan's room, since Kate _insisted_ that they needed to be surprised by the big reveal. And, you know, so Kate could get some _other things_ ready as well.

Kate finished zipping K up, and the shorter woman took a moment to check the way her hair was pinned up as she put in the sparkling earrings and glanced up at Kate in the mirror. "What?" she asked when she saw the almost dreamy smile on her friend's face.

"I'm just in a great mood. You know. Because I was right. And this dress so needed to be seen. And you are going to make an enemy when you kill Logan dead," Kate said with a grin.

"What about you?" K said as she turned to face her and reached out to fiddle with Kate's hair. "Aren't you supposed to get changed? You didn't trick me into putting on an evening gown all by myself, did you?"

"No way; I just want to see the hug magnet's face when he sees you …" She gestured at K with one hand and a broad grin. "...like this. _So far_ from blue jeans and t-shirts."

K rolled her eyes but quickly put on a swipe of lipstick, then tried to laugh off Kate's obvious enthusiasm as there was a gentle knock at the door — that Kate answered.

"He's distracted," Logan said quietly to Kate. "You ready for this, kid?"

Kate glanced up at K — who looked as if she was still preoccupied with getting her makeup just right — and took a deep breath. She plastered on the huge smile she'd been wearing before with K and nodded. "Yes. I think so," she said. "Just don't … _worry_ about me. You have your own things to worry over." She took his arm and pulled him inside, though she didn't get him far before he stopped and gave K a slow once over with a growing smile.

"So subtle, Kate," K said as she made her way over to Logan. She opened her mouth to say something snarky, but it never got out before Logan simply kissed the sense out of her and swept her out of the room.

"See you downstairs; can't promise that we'll be dancin'," Logan said with a wink Kate's way, finally leaving her alone to gather her thoughts like Logan knew she needed to do.

Kate let out a breath and closed the door, leaning on it for a moment before she made her way back over to the dresser to steel herself.

She examined the ring one last time in its velvet case. It was a deep black Tungsten — it would look _amazing_ on Kurt, especially with the white gold in the middle. Darkness with light at its center — it was just what she wanted for him.

Now if only she could just… _give_ it to him.

She was supposed to be changing into her dress ... she'd insisted that Kurt couldn't spoil the surprise by peeking. So there was no worry of him seeing…

She slid the lid closed and put the box back in the drawer of the dresser, tucked behind her socks. So far, she'd managed to keep it hidden from all but one bamf, too — and thankfully, it was her little flirt, who saw the box, let out a string of giggles, and then held his finger to his lips with a significant look, though the little guy kept giving her this _look_ ever since he'd found it, like he was waiting for her to get a _move_ on.

She sighed as she pulled on the gown, adjusted the necklace she was wearing, and then took a deep breath. "Okay, I'm ready!" she called out, and Kurt 'ported in front of her in an instant, dressed to the nines and grinning broadly as he took her in.

" _Du siehst hübsch aus,_ " he said as he took her in his arms, and she just grinned nervously, glad that he couldn't quite see her expression in the hug.

"You look pretty handsome yourself," she told him as she took a step back and raked her gaze over his outfit. She paused and bit her lip. She _had_ the next line. She'd been practicing what she'd say all day. It was easy. Simple. Just say: _I think you're missing something_. That was all she had to do. That was the line, and then she'd give him the ring.

Instead, what she said was, "I like the cuff links."

He grinned as a few of the bamfs chattered for her attention as well until she'd told them each that she liked their ties too — though her little flirt was giving her that same look, arms crossed, tail twitching, and when he saw that he'd caught her attention, he pointed at his eyes and then at her before he teleported over to Kurt's shoulder, gave her another look, and then broke into an impish grin Kurt's way.

Kurt just smiled and offered Kate his arm. "Shall we, _frauline_?" he asked with a bit of a bow, and Kate wordlessly took the proffered arm and let him lead her down toward the ballroom, as with every step they could hear the jazz music getting louder and she cursed herself for punking out when she'd had a _plan._

When they got to the party, it looked like several people were already out dancing, including Noh and Jubilee, who both looked like they'd just stepped out of a black and white movie together. When they saw Kate and Kurt, Noh picked Jubilee up as they spun so that she could see them too, and as soon as the song was over and the band played something different, the newlyweds all but skipped over to Kate and Kurt.

"This music travels through your smile," Noh declared once they'd arrived. "It's impossible not to move to." He gestured across the dance floor at Logan and K, who weren't dancing so much as they were demonstrating the most popular past time of the pre-war era; already overly involved with each other. "Not even our quieter friends seem to be able to resist its draw."

"They both lived through this era the first time around," Kurt said. "Though I believe their experiences were starkly different."

"Probably," Kate agreed, taking a tighter grip on Kurt's arm and wondering if it was too late to try again. It was probably too late. They were in public now.

"Doesn't Jubilee look stunning in this era's clothing?" Noh said to Kurt with a wide smile. "I have only seen her look so beautiful once before, though perhaps I am biased in my remembrance of that day at the beach."

"It's entirely possible," Kurt said with a grin before he turned to Kate and asked her to dance while the band went into a nice, slow Ella Fitzgerald song.

"You… you really do look nice," Kate said after a few moments of spinning to "Dream a Little Dream." "The debonair look really suits you. You should — you should wear it more often."

He grinned and stole a quick kiss. "And you are a vision tonight," Kurt replied.

She just smiled almost shyly. "Then everybody else must be jealous."

"With few exceptions," Kurt laughed. "Though they seem only to be those that are too preoccupied to notice how you're stealing the show."

"How _we're_ stealing the show," she corrected him before she stole a kiss and lost herself in the music for a while.

Not long after that, the song ended, and most of the couples cleared the floor as something a bit more upbeat started up. On their way off the dancefloor, Logan and K caught up to them, and Logan very quickly leaned in and asked how she was doing, low and quiet.

"I'll… get there," she muttered low enough just for him.

"Have a drink, loosen up," he advised.

"Might help," she agreed.

Logan looked over his shoulder to where Scott was totally preoccupied with Annie and welcoming Captain America to the party as he reached into his jacket's inner pocket to slip her a flask.

She took a couple long drinks before she slipped it back to him. "It should _not_ be this scary," she muttered under her breath.

"You'll be fine," he promised. "Stick by us if you're nervous."

"Thanks," she breathed out, as Cap made his way over to say hello to his old friend, looking like he might burst from grinning — and wearing something that looked entirely authentic.

The smile on his face only broadened when he saw the two women with Logan and Kurt. "Kate, K — _where_ did you get those?" he asked.

"Paris, in the 30's," K said with a little smirk. "Got the good stuff out before the war started."

He grinned at her even wider and then shook his head. "You're full of surprises, K," he said.

"You want to dance?" K offered.

"If your fiance doesn't mind," Steve replied with a glance Logan's way.

"Go on, have fun," Logan said. "Just keep it at a dance."

Steve grinned broadly and offered his hand to K before he pulled her out into a dance to an old Glenn Miller tune. K gave the group a little wave as Kate giggled and grabbed Logan by the arm. "Dance with me," she asked him.

He just gave her a little smirk and nodded. "You got it, darlin'," he said, letting her pull him onto the floor.

She followed his lead as he pulled her into the dance for a while, just letting her be quiet for a while until she was ready to tell him — "I totally blew it. I had a line and everything."

"You don't need a line," Logan told her. "And you didn't blow it."

She blew out all her breath from her cheeks. "I want him to — you know, he's just so charming, so I want to charm him, and I _had it_."

"Honey, you can't charm a charmer," he said with a little laugh. "Just do it."

"Right. Yeah. Okay." She nodded a couple times and glanced over at Kurt, who was laughing at something Jubilee was saying. "Okay. I can do it."

As the song was coming to a close, Noh and Jubilee made their way across the dance floor to where K and Steve were dancing, and Noh tipped his head at them for a moment. "Can you show me how to do that?"

"Which part?" K asked. "It's pretty simple, really." She looked up at Steve. "Can you show Jubilee how to follow? I'll try to help the sparkling moondust baby boy."

Steve was grinning ear to ear as he offered his hand to Jubilee. "I'll do my best not to step on your toes," he teased as "If I Didn't Care" started up, while K let out a breath and tried to explain the dance to Noh as Kate had to grin from the sidelines at them.

"I've been learning dances as I go through Earth music, but the earliest I've learned is from the 1950's," he explained sheepishly as he narrowly avoided stepping on her foot.

"Oh, that has to change," K said with a little smile. "You're going to love swing — and if you're interested, there are a few from the 20's that are fun too."

He brightened entirely. "I'm always interested in music! There is nothing in multiple universes that quite matches what this world does."

"Hard to beat Glenn Miller and Billie Holliday no matter where you are," K said, laughing a bit at his enthusiasm.

"Shall we try that spin again?" he offered. "I think I understand the steps."

"You're leading now, hon," K told him. "Spin me when you want to."

He beamed at her for a long moment, leading her through the steps she'd taught him until he was ready for the spin, and the pure _delight_ on his face when he spun her back to him was hard to miss. "Oh, I do think I like this era of music."

They finished the rest of the song together like that before Steve and K brought the newlywed couple back together as Noh extended his hand to Jubilee. "My dear Jubilee, do you think you could trust me to lead?" he asked with a teasing sparkle in his eyes.

"I can try," Jubilee teased right back as she took his hand with a grin.

Steve escorted K back to Logan and then asked Kate if she'd like to dance next, and Kate had to grin as she tossed a kiss over her shoulder at Kurt before she followed Steve's lead onto the floor.

"If we're playing the partner switch game, do you think you wanna play with me?" asked Tony as he slipped over to where K was with a wide grin.

She let out a little laugh and looked Logan's way. "Do you mind? I won't be too long."

"You know where to find me," Logan said before he gave her a quick kiss and glared Stark's way as they headed out for the dance.

"Do you even have any idea what you're doing? Because my teaching is over for tonight," K told him.

"Hey, I may not know how to kill people nine ways with a spoon, but this?" Stark grinned at her. "This is my turf. Dances, parties — I even brought you a present."

"Just make sure that you don't accidentally wander into the no fly zone, or you might not get it back."

Stark laughed outright and shook his head. "No, this one you asked for," he said as he reached into his coat pocket to show her the invention he had tucked in there. "And let me tell you. This was a _challenge_. Keep bringing me stuff like this, and I think we'll be fast friends," he laughed.

"Well if it's ideas for gadgets to help me take down things bigger than me? I'm sure we'll have plenty to discuss. How does it work?" she asked.

"Hey, you asked for a modified Widow's Bite, right?" He pulled out the little blue devices shaped like bracelets. "These pack twenty times the shock, but it's a one-time use. Takes a day and a half to recharge — but it'll flatten the big guy if you hit him right."

"Oh, I can hit him right," K said, smirking. She took a moment to look it over as he explained the finer points, and after he'd finally finished, she gave him a little grin. "Thank you. When I get him, I'll send you a picture of the damage."

"Please do," he said with a grin to match hers. "It's way more satisfying to see the end result."

By then, the song had ended, and she tipped her head toward Logan. "Time to get back. You coming?"

He looked Logan's way and shook his head when he saw the glare Logan had on. "Ah, no," he said. "I think there are some other people who need dance partners."

She gave his hand a little squeeze as she thanked him again and made her way right back to Logan almost at a jog, past Noh, who was enthusiastically pulling Jubilee along already to the next dance.

Meanwhile, Kate had been watching the whole show with a growing smile, pleased that her party had gone off so well for everyone involved, when she was pleasantly surprised by a familiar _bamf_ noise and a pair of strong arms around her.

"Can I steal you for a dance, or is your card full?" Kurt asked with a teasing smile as he offered Kate his hand, and she seized it with both of hers to pull him along, grinning wide.

"You're my favorite dance partner," she promised him as they spun out onto the floor. She was contentedly grinning up at him for a while as they danced until she caught Logan looking at her nearby, where he was watching with K — though K was watching Noh and Jubilee with a smirk and thankfully not paying attention to Kate.

As Logan saw that he had Kate's attention, he tipped his head at her with a very pointed look, and she stuck her tongue out at him in response. He glared a bit harder, then mouthed out 'Chicken Hawk', before returning his attention to his dance partner as Kate shot him a dirty look. But then she looked up to see the bamfs on that side of the dance floor doing a little bit of a chicken dance.

She glared in their direction for a moment too long as Kurt turned to see what it was that she was looking at, but as soon as the bamfs saw that they were about to get caught, they very pointedly put their little arms behind their backs and started walking in circles and whistling innocently, trying to imitate the dancing that was going on around them.

"What are they up to?" he asked, almost to himself, and Kate shook her head.

"They're just being little demons," she said, sticking her tongue out at them again for good measure, which got a couple of them to pull faces at her and fall apart in troublemaking giggles. She shook her head and then put her full attention back on Kurt. "Never mind them. They're just… teasing me because Logan's egging them on. Silly imps." And to keep him from asking any further questions, she stood on her toes and wrapped him in a kiss.

But when this kiss broke and Kurt glanced over toward his best friend, Logan and K were doing their best display of the evening, kissing as they spun slowly. He couldn't help but grin and misinterpret Kate's meaning — only to melt into the same 'dance' with her.

* * *

_Translations:_

_Du siehst hübsch aus -_ You look pretty.


	15. Early Bird Shoppers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which K, Kate, and Annie head out to do a little early Christmas shopping shortly after their Halloween Masquerade.

Annie was still grinning from the Halloween party two days later. Several of the old songs were still stuck in her head when she asked if Kate and K would join her for a little trip into Salem Center. It had been a new unspoken rule among the group to make sure that at least one team member was with Annie when she headed into town, as Scott was understandably paranoid about another Sinister attempt on her — especially with the twins she was carrying.

And Scott had been more protective than usual since the twins news.

Kate had volunteered to drive, of course, and the three of them piled into her little purple car with wide grins. "I've still got to find something nice to wear for Kurt's birthday," she told Annie with a sideways smile.

"Are you sure you're using the right word?" K asked innocently.

"No, no, it's definitely his _birthday_ ," Kate replied straight-faced.

"Oh, yeah. I'm sure it's just that you and I have _very_ different definitions of 'nice'."

Kate chuckled quietly. "K has a very dirty mind," she told Annie, who gave them both her best impression of her Kindergarten teacher look.

"You have no idea," K agreed with a smirk.

The three girls spent the entire trip listening to the radio, which Kate controlled with a deep insistence on avoiding the channels that were already playing Christmas music "because it's _stupid_ they start so early."

"Well, that's actually what I want to do," Annie defended. "Get a little Christmas shopping done."

"Yeah, but that's because you're…" Kate gestured at Annie, who was very obviously in the home stretch by then. "No Christmas Eve shopping for you. Not that close to when the mini bosses are due."

"So what is the plan then, shopping queens?" K asked. "You said shopping, which — fine. But I'm sure you have a list."

Annie just laughed. "Oh, I've already got something for Scott. I just need to find a few things for my nieces and nephews. And I wanted to get something for the babies, in case they're early. That's a worry with multiples, I've been told."

"That doesn't sound like the same stores I was thinking about visiting," Kate laughed. "But we'll go there with you first. _If_ you promise to tell me how well the dresses I try on later hug my hips just right," she added with a teasing smile that had Annie laughing.

"Are you getting anything for those little imps of yours?" she asked.

"Coloring books," Kate said with a glance K's way. "They're little artists."

"I had nothing to do with that. It's just smart to encourage any artistic endeavour," K insisted. "Not my fault if they're better than Clint."

Kate snorted, and Annie grinned. "Oh, you should get something for him," she told Kate. "Something for his little boy."

"That's not a bad idea," Kate laughed.

"He needs one of those digital picture frames," K said. "You can load hundreds of pictures on there, and it keeps rotating them."

"Oh, he'd love that." Kate grinned at K in the rearview mirror. "Then he'd stop shoving his phone under everyone's nose every time they come over to his place."

"Yeah, instead he'd just make you stand in front of it the whole time while he waited for the right one to pop up."

"That's entirely true," Kate laughed.

"Oh, give him a break," Annie laughed. "He's so proud. That little boy is his spitting image, you know."

"Yet he still can't accept it," K said with a shake of her head.

Kate held up both hands, feeling like she should defend her mentor. "Oh, he can. He just… doesn't want to say anything until _Jess_ accepts it. _She's_ the one telling people it was a donor."

"Oh, she didn't get that photoshopped picture that Jubes made then?" K asked.

"Which one?" Kate asked.

"The one with all the bandages and the purple onesie." K was grinning at Kate almost maliciously.

Annie laughed delightedly. "Oh, I saw that!" She turned to face K better. "It really was darling. When I got the text, I thought it was for Kate, though — what with the caption."

"The girl has talent," K agreed. "But 'baby hawk' wouldn't be the caption for Kate."

Kate rolled her eyes pointedly at K. "Ha ha. Very funny."

"Don't look at me like that, Chicken Hawk," K replied, though it did nothing for Kate's expression. "Yes. I caught the bamfs calling you 'Chicken Hawk.'"

"They were being little demons. Must be something about Halloween," Kate said dismissively as she pulled to a stop at a red light. "They know I hate that nickname."

"It's adorable, but it still doesn't separate you from Clint. He could be 'Chicken Hawk' too," K said as reassuringly as she could.

Kate rolled her eyes even harder. "I don't need to separate from Clint. He's my idiot mentor," she pointed out before she turned to the third member of their group. "And you're right, Annie — he needs something for his little boy. I'd love your advice on some good gifts, seeing as you have experience with the nephews."

"Kid needs a teddy bear," K said quietly, staring out the window.

"With a purple tee shirt." Kate grinned. "I'm pretty good at finding teddy bears."

"Do you mean an actual teddy bear, or one of those adorable things your boyfriend gave my nieces and nephews?" Annie asked with a smile. "You know Aman _won't_ sleep without his. Pitches an absolute fit if he can't find it before bedtime or naptime."

"They're much less trouble than the real things," Kate chuckled.

The three women continued to chat about a few different ideas for presents for all of Annie's little family members as well as presents for the mini bosses — though no matter how many ways Kate suggested that she needed customized baby clothes with their names on them, Annie was very, very good at _not_ giving them any sort of clues about what names they had picked out.

The first stop was a toy store where, of course, K was sure to help Kate pick out a purple teddy bear for Clint — and one for little Gerry too.

Annie found several toys for her nieces and nephews, and Kate slipped K a little baby onesie with blue tiger stripes that she insisted had to be K's present for when Annie had the babies. "It just has to happen," Kate said.

"It really doesn't," K countered, looking entirely unamused. "Ever."

"Come on. Mini bosses with _tiger stripes._ "

"Their father would have a stroke. No. I _like_ Scott," K said. "He's a good guy."

"I like him too. But he's so fun to tease," Kate said with a sigh as she replaced the onesie.

"Way. Too. Easy." K shook her head, frowning at the selections around them. "I'll figure something out in time. Don't worry."

Kate grinned at her and shrugged before the three of them made their way to the checkout, stashed their bags, and then headed to a dress store, where Kate tried on several gowns that fit both K and Kate's definitions of 'nice.' In the end, Kate ended up buying one of each kind — a short, sassy black with sheer sleeves and a longer purple dress with a slit almost up to her hip.

"You still haven't told us where you're taking him for his birthday," Annie said with a smile.

"If I told anybody, it would ruin the surprise," Kate shot back as she admired her reflection. She had some _serious_ plans for Kurt's birthday, and she wasn't going to chicken out this time. But… just in case she did, she didn't want anyone to know or she'd be suffering the kind of looks Logan had been giving her nonstop after the Halloween failure.

"Oh come on. You know we're not going to tell him," Annie laughed.

"Keep it to yourself," K said with a shrug. "I'm sure we'll hear all about it sooner or later."

"Yeah, I'm sure you will," Kate said with a muted smirk. She popped the trunk of her car to stash the bag with the dresses inside when K froze behind her and inhaled deeply with her eyes closed — then let out a low growl.

"Get her outta here," K hissed, but before either of the other two could move, K and Kate were both grabbed by massive men. They both started immediately making the men regret their decision, while Annie backed away from the struggling girls as Kate shouted for her to just _go_.

Annie rushed to the driver's side, and as she opened the door, a large man appeared behind her and slammed it shut again. Annie glanced up with wide eyes to see the familiar red diamond and pale face and let out a gasp. She hadn't learned to fight back against him — but she'd learned enough to know when it was time to run.

She stomped on his foot and took off, though the twins she was carrying slowed her down significantly, and the creepy Mr. Sinister practically strolled after her, not concerned about catching up.

Meanwhile, K squirmed and twisted until she got one arm to a point that she could use it — and with a flick and some serious pressure, she cut one arm off of the guy holding her, stabbed the one who had Kate, and rushed toward where Annie had run off. The tall looming figure was easy to spot, but he was prepared for her — and not at all in any mood to play, not when there were the twins and Annie so clearly within his grasp. He turned to face K as Annie ran and froze the little feral to the spot.

"I'll get to you in good time," he promised with a self-satisfied smile as he turned back to Annie, who was puffing and panting and clearly terrified. He shook his head. "Don't overexert yourself, Annette."

He'd nearly reached Annie when there was a familiar _twang_ of a bow, and Kate had puttied the hand he was using to reach for Annie to one of the pillars of the parking area. He glanced around for the offending archer as he pulled his hand free Annie took off running again, and Kate just grinned before she shot two more arrows his way — which he caught, but they were explosive.

He'd lost his grip on K because of both the explosions and their resulting healing as well as his focus on going after Kate — and the little woman rushed in as fast as she could on his blind side. K launched herself toward him, and when she got close enough, she pulled back her sleeve and tried out Tony's newest toy.

It positively fried him.

Sinister twitched and smoked for a good thirty seconds before the energy was drained. K and Kate were left staring at each other for a moment longer even after he stilled. "You get Annie. I have a photo to take," K said at last with a little smirk as she pulled her cell phone out.

Kate had to return the smirk for a second before she nodded and dashed off after Annie, who she found half doubled over and panting, her eyes wide with terror. Immediately concerned, Kate rushed over to Annie, one hand on her back as she tried to reassured her.

"We gotcha, Annie. No grabbing for you," Kate said quickly as she pulled her up in a hug with one arm and dialed Kurt's number with the other hand. "Kurt, I need you to come get Annie home. We're in Salem Center Square, northwest corner of the second floor parking garage."

A moment later, Kurt was standing a few parking rows away, but he quickly spotted them and made his way over. "What happened?" he asked as he took Annie's hands in his and pulled her closer to support her as she started to cry.

"Get her to Scott — and Hank. Sinister came after her, but K put him on the ground," Kate said in a rush. "She's just overexerted."

Kurt stared at her for just a second before Annie let out a hitching sob, and he disappeared with her. Kate was sure that she was going to hear about this when she got home, especially since the X-Men were so touchy about Sinister and Kate was still sure that Kurt didn't think she could handle him on her own. Which she couldn't, but that's why K was there.

By the time Kate got to K, she'd taken several pictures and even had gotten the nerve to try and pose him by hogtieing him. "Don't judge," she said with a smirk when she saw Kate.

"Hey, you downed him. You get to do what you want," Kate smirked.

She tossed Kate her phone. "You ever see those big game hunting pictures?" She was very nearly giggling. "I don't think we have much time but I need this. For bragging rights." She put one foot on Sinister's hip and nodded.

Kate giggled. "Well, I'm not Peter Parker, but…" She snapped a couple of pictures before she tossed K the phone. "We'd better scoot before he wakes up, though."

"Yes. Agreed," K said. "If he wakes up. I know Scott is going to be so mad, but this is his Christmas present."

"Get him one of those digital picture frames and let them cycle through," Kate laughed.

"Yes. that's exactly what he needs — though I'm sure Logan won't be happy either."

Kate tipped her head at the little purple car. "Yeah, well, Kurt didn't look to happy when he came to get Annie... let's take the longer way home," she suggested.

"You're driving," K said. "But drive fast, because it'll take a long time for this thing to recharge and the longer we let them stew, the worse it will be."

"You got it," Kate said as she slid into the driver's seat. She didn't turn up the radio until they were well past the still-unconscious Sinister, but as soon as she felt halfway safe, she turned the volume up and turned to K. "Little cheer before we get yelled at," she explained before she started to sing along at the top of her lungs.

As Kate drove, K leaned the seat back a bit and sent a couple of pictures to Tony and the big game hunting one to Kurt, so he knew that they were well on their way home. Still, even with the good mood the two of them had going, when they pulled into the garage, the radio still turned way up, Kate let out a sigh when she saw that Scott, Kurt, _and_ Logan were waiting for them.

"This is going to be harder to talk our way out of," K said at just over a whisper with her head tipped down at the phone.

"What? We stopped the snatch, we got our shopping done, nobody died — I think we did well."

"Yet. Nobody died yet. Hold on to those high points, my darling purple sweetie pie," K said.

Kate just sighed and then pushed open the door to the car, stepping out with a little wave. "Hi, guys," she said. "Is Annie okay?"

"What did you girls think you were doing?" Scott said, skipping past the small talk as he looked _livid_ — not that Kate could blame him, considering who they had just run into. "You were careless."

"We were shopping! It's not a crime."

"In the most recognizable car in this part of the state," Scott said, color rising in his cheeks.

"Not true," K said, shaking her head. "There is that guy with the Scooby Doo van …" But her tease fell flat when Logan glared at her with a growl.

"Hey. We beat the bad guys!" Kate shot back.

"By sheer luck," Scott said. "How did you even do it?"

K raised her hand and pulled her sleeve back to show him. "Little present from Tony Stark. It's meant for Victor — but, in a pinch—"

"What are you doing with— never mind." Scott was glaring hard at both of them, hands at his sides in fists for a moment. "You shouldn't have had to use them. You _know_ Essex is after Annie, and you—" He turned to Kate. "You have a death threat hanging over your mailbox every week, and you're still _driving around in that thing_."

"I'm not going to let these stupid people change a thing about me, Scott!" Kate half-shouted back.

"Hey, take it easy on her — she did everything that you outlined for us when we leave the house with Annie. She called Kurt immediately to get her out and home, and _we got away._ " K had stepped between Kate and Scott and was holding her ground. "Thank your lucky stars that I asked Tony for help, or this would be a totally different kind of evening."

"Sheer luck," Scott repeated again, shaking his head at her.

"Sheer luck what? That we got away without your help?"

"Sheer luck that you just happened to be working on something for Sabretooth that worked in this instance," he shot back. "I know Tony gave that to you at Halloween. We're lucky he finished it that fast."

"Like I said — you should thank him," K replied. "Quit with the bad stuff that could have happened — because it didn't."

"How's Annie?" Kate asked again, this time poking her head around K's shoulder and trying to defuse the argument before it could get even more out of hand.

Scott let out a breath in a huff and did almost a double take as he looked at Kate. "She's fine. She got a little scared, but she's fine. She was worried about you two more than anything."

Kate let out a little smile and held up her hand. "We brought the Christmas presents she bought for your nieces and nephews," she said as she pulled out her keys to pop the trunk. "That ought to cheer her up." She grabbed the bags that were Annie's and then closed the trunk again so no one could see the dresses. She popped back over to Scott with her most disarming smile. "I'll take a different car from now on with Annie," she promised as she handed him the bags.

Scott looked between the girls for a minute before he finally let out a breath, deciding that, for the moment, he was more concerned with checking in on Annie again.

When Scott left the garage, though, Logan and Kurt both blocked K's path. "Really? Posing with Sinister?" Logan said. "Is this going to be a recurring problem with you?"

K was quiet for a moment before she shrugged openly. "If the opportunity presents itself? Possibly. You said I couldn't kill people that deserved it, so I have to do something to entertain myself." Logan gave her a glare before Kurt turned to Kate.

"I take it that you were the photographer?" he said.

"I'm not as good as Pete, I know," she said with an attempt at a teasing grin.

"I'm not letting you out of my sight, you know that right?" Logan said toward K.

"That goes for me too," Kurt said to Kate.

Kate smiled sweetly at Kurt. "C'mon, honey, we got out _well_ before he would've woken up. Those things could bring down a herd of elephants."

"That body might actually have been dead," K said. "I'm not entirely sure." She waved her hand. "It really wasn't that bad."

"Annie said he was going to come back for you," Logan pointed out. "She was upset about that part."

"Well he didn't," K said, clearly trying to downplay it. "Because I got to him first."

"I have her back, Logan — you know I do. I puttied the freak to a wall and blew two arrows in his face," Kate said.

"Did Kate tell you what he did the last time he got a hold of me?" Logan asked. Both girls shared a look and shook their heads. "You're not leaving my sight."

"Make it worth my time, and I won't be mad about it then," K told him before she stepped forward and kissed him. "Goodnight, Kate. I have to be babysat, apparently."

"Yeah, well, good luck with that," Kate said, looking at Kurt as both Logan and K headed out. "I have to… deal with this one."

Kurt let out a breath as soon as the two ferals left, and he took a step forward to just wrap her up in a hug. "Please, next time this happens — call me right away."

"I know. We would have called you sooner, but we had Marauders on us," she assured him as she held him a bit closer. "And we had to get Annie out. But I'm sorry we scared you."

"The picture is actually pretty good," Kurt said with a smile, starting to loosen up a bit now that the initial scare was over — and Logan wasn't around. "But you really shouldn't encourage her to play games with Sinister. I don't think she quite understands what he does."

"Hey, she was already taking selfies when I got there," Kate defended. "I was just there for that last one." She nestled her face into his chest. "I'm sure Logan will tell her what's up. I'd hate for her to learn like I did back when we first met."

"The fact that she doesn't know who he is and she's fought him twice just means trouble," Kurt said. "Frankly, she's lucky that he's trying to pry into Scott's life right now, or this would have been a different encounter."

Kate smiled softly at him and took a step back. "Rookie cadet error," she said in her best approximation of Noh. "Thinking about what might have been." She poked him in the chest with a sideways grin. "You wait right here. I have some Christmas present and stuff you're not allowed to see. Let me bag it in my quiver in the trunk." She laughed as he shook his head with an affectionate smile before she did just that, looking over the hood of her trunk at him with a smirk. "You know. Seeing as you're not letting me out of your sight or whatever."

"He tries to sound angry, but it's just his excuse to hide away with her until he's not worried," Kurt said with a smile. "It sounds like a solid plan to me."

She grinned and shouldered the quiver as she slammed the trunk back down. "Well, when you put it like _that_ , it's much more appealing," she laughed.


	16. Charming the Charmer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's FINALLY HAPPENING! ... um. I mean. So. Amazing things are afoot.

The night before Kurt's birthday, Kate had kicked him out of their room for about an hour while she packed a suitcase for both of them, which he was _not allowed_ to look in, and once she let him back in, she informed him that he'd better get some good sleep, because they were getting up for a pre-dawn flight.

For Kate, waking up that early was a struggle, but it was a private flight anyway, so at least they didn't have to wade through as much as a commercial airline would put them through — though she immediately went back to sleep on Kurt's shoulder once they were seated on the plane and stayed relatively snuggled up for most of the flight to Paris.

She set an alarm, woke up, and insisted that he wear a blindfold once they got close enough to their destination that he might figure it out, and she already had a cab waiting for them once they got off the plane to take them to the hotel she'd booked. They got a few funny looks at the hotel — and several knowing ones, since in this city, of all cities, romantic surprises were not an uncommon sight — before she finally got them all set and let him take the blindfold off again once she had him faced toward the window.

"Ta da!" She gestured with one arm at the lovely view of Paris. "An evening in the City of Lights. And with a not-panicking girlfriend. Just for you!" she teased.

He turned to her with a grin. "Beautiful," he said as he stepped closer to her. "And the city looks lovely too." He picked up her hand and kissed her knuckles gently. "You're running the show, _V_ _ö_ _gelchen_."

"Well, I have dinner reservations for tonight — and a lovely little cafe in the morning... " She grinned up at him for a moment. "I thought maybe I'd let you see the city first before we put the blindfold back on for dinner. You look very cute when you have no idea where you're going."

"I trust you completely," he said as he cupped her face with his hand and matched her smile. "This is amazing. All of it."

She grinned and stole a quick kiss before she took a step over to the suitcase to pull out a suit she'd packed for him. "Oh, trust me. I'm just getting started," she promised as she laid it out for him. "I'm going to change, but you better be wearing your blindfold when I come out," she said, leveling her finger at him. "Or I won't tell you where we're going for dessert."

"Yes, dear," he said with a little chuckle as he made his way to where the suit was laid out.

She grinned and took the whole suitcase with her into the bathroom and took her sweet time slipping into the purple dress and doing her hair just right — she was even sure to wear the necklace he'd given her for their anniversary last time they were in Paris, just for _dramatic emphasis._ She _was_ about to propose to the drama teacher after all.

And of course, when she came back out, he was grinning ear to ear and looking ridiculously dapper in his suit, even with the blindfold on. She grabbed his hand and pulled him to his feet to kiss his cheek. "Oh, if we didn't have reservations…" she teased in a low whisper before she kissed him properly and then led him out of the room toward the waiting cab.

By the time they got to the restaurant, it was clear he was just enjoying the ride as she kept giggling to herself — and the wait staff had to stifle a chuckle or two on seeing them. It really wasn't that uncommon a sight for couples up there, though Kate and Kurt were fairly different from what they were used to seeing.

She got him all seated and then sat down across from him, fiddled with the necklace one more time, and then let out a sigh. "Alright. We're here. You can look now," she told him, her hand resting inside her purse just to make doubly sure the jewelry box was there.

He blinked a few times as he pulled the blindfold off, staring around the restaurant for a moment, his smile growing by the second. "You've got me on presentation," he teased.

"Someone told me I couldn't charm the charmer, and I took it as a challenge," Kate said with a little smirk as she toasted him, and he grinned all the wider.

"An over-the-top way to celebrate a birthday, _liebling_ ," Kurt said. "But I love it."

"Well, I love you," she said as if this was all the answer he needed. She paused and tipped her head his way before she took a deep, cleansing breath and slid her hand into her purse, figuring she should move now while she still had the nerve. After _all this work_ , she was _not_ going to have another false start. No way. "Oh, and you probably want your present."

"I thought this was the present," he said, his brow scrunched the slightest in spite of the broad grin.

"This is the gift wrapping," she said with a little smile before she took another deep breath and pushed the little jewelry box his way. _Can't take it back now._

He frowned a bit and hesitantly took the box, wondering what she might have gotten up to, and sure that it was something similar to the pendant he'd given her. So it was all the more stunning when he opened it to find the ring.

Kate waited for him to say something as he was obviously in a state of shock, and she took a quick sip of wine. When he still hadn't said anything either way, though, she started to babble nervously. "If — if you don't like it, we can get something else."

"It's beautiful. I just … I guess I don't understand," Kurt said carefully. "What did I do to warrant something this lovely?"

"You're… it's for you!" Kate bit her lip for a moment. This was _not_ what she'd expected, and she wasn't sure what to do with it. "I thought — is it too showy or something? Or ... you don't want a ring? Or…" She was wide-eyed. "Did I read this wrong? You… I thought… I'm sorry, did _you_ want to propose instead?"

That got a wide-eyed look from him as he stared at her. "This is a proposal?" Before she could answer, the smile started to grow on his face.

"Right. Yeah. I should have been clearer?" She rubbed the back of her neck. "So ... what do you say? Do you want to get married?"

He stood up and walked to her side of the table before he got down on his knee and pulled her into a kiss. "Just say when — you have me," he said with a grin. "Yes, of course."

She beamed at him and kissed him back for a long, long time before she remembered that they still hadn't eaten and cleared her throat. "Right. We can… talk about a cathedral later?" she whispered in his ear.

When the couple parted though, the entire population of the restaurant around them erupted into applause, and the waiter approached them with a pair of champagne flutes to toast them.

Kate was still very pink in the face as she sat back in her chair and just grinned over at Kurt. "Try it on," she urged him. "I sort of… borrowed the one you had from the priesthood to get it sized. It should fit right."

He moved his chair closer to her and offered her his left hand. "Let's find out, shall we?"

She couldn't stop grinning — or even the occasional nervous, relieved laugh — as she slid the ring on and then looked up to see that he was still looking like he might burst. "Looks like it does," she said quietly. "Look at that."

He grinned and kissed her. "May I find one for you, too?"

She nodded quickly. "I bet you could talk Logan into helping you look. He has good tastes," she said with a little smirk.

"I may do that," Kurt said before he kissed her again.

"And I was thinking… maybe Germany," she added. "A big, old cathedral, someplace in the mountains…."

"Anything you like," he said, nodding and positively beaming.

She let out a breath and kissed him on the nose. "You have a say in this too, silly Elf."

"As long as you're there with me, the rest doesn't matter," Kurt replied. "It's the marriage I'm looking forward to — the wedding is just a formality."

"Just let me give you something nice," Kate said with a pretended exasperated sigh before she just gave up and kissed him all over again.

* * *

Kate and Kurt spent three full days in Paris before they came back, though to be honest, neither of them remembered much with the high they were still riding even after they arrived back in the States and drove back to the mansion.

Kate had already warned Kurt that Logan knew she was going to propose, so neither of them were surprised to see that Logan and K were waiting for them in the garage when they pulled in. Logan looked proud, and K looked a little bit shocked as the newly engaged couple got out of the car, all smiles, immediately reattaching as soon as they'd climbed out of the driver's and passenger's seats.

The two little ferals made their way over and wrapped them up in hugs, congratulating them as Kurt more or less just grinned like a fool through the whole thing.

"How'd it go down finally?" Logan asked.

"Took him to the Eiffel Tower," Kate said, shooting a smirk K's way. "And then they applauded and gave us champagne."

"Well, congratulations," K told her before she gave her another quick squeeze. "You two deserve the best."

Kate beamed at her and gave her a far longer hug. "Thanks for talking me out of the trees," she whispered.

Kurt was grinning between the two of them after he gave Logan another hug. "Perhaps we could make it a double wedding," he suggested.

K stared at him for a moment in near horror but couldn't quite find the words more than to just shake her head at him. "We'll find our own way, Elf," Logan said with a smirk before he put his arm around K, kissed the side of her head, and led her toward the house.

Kate and Kurt grinned at each other before they followed suit, poking around for someone else to share their news with before they found a few people in the teacher's lounge. Annie was talking with Scott about plans for the end of the semester already, and Jubilee was sitting in Noh's lap as he was telling her about the old 20's and 30's music K had him hooked on while she munched happily on some Skittles.

The bamfs had also figured out that Kate and Kurt were back by then and were following close behind the little couple, so those in the room knew something was up when, as soon as Kate and Kurt entered the teacher's lounge, all the bamfs poofed into the room with little presentation noises and arms wide open.

"Oh look," Noh said with a little smirk. "I think our friends are back. I almost didn't notice them come in for the subtle entrance that they made." He tipped his head at the two of them and then picked Jubilee up around the waist to scoot over so the two of them could join them on the couch. "It was a good trip, then?"

"The best," Kurt replied with a grin.

Kate was beaming too as she leaned into Kurt and one of the bamfs crawled into her lap for a little high five. "We're already making plans to go back to Europe next winter. You guys planning on being around then?" she asked with an ever-widening grin.

"Well, we certainly don't plan on leaving anytime soon," Annie said with a smile Scott's way before she tipped her head at the two of them. "Were you thinking about having a big family get-together or something?" she asked, smiling wide.

"More like a wedding," Kate said, unable to hide the grin and the giggle.

"What?" Scott asked as he started to smile, the disbelief transitioning faster for him since, well, he'd _only_ known Kate since she was dating and totally wrapped up around Kurt. "You're engaged now?"

"As of three days ago," Kate said with a delighted laugh. "Show him your ring, Kurt."

"You _still_ have me on presentation," Kurt teased her, but he was still laughing as he obliged and showed off the Tungsten ring, so she knew he didn't mean a thing by it.

"I thought it was customary for _you_ to wear the engagement ring," Noh said. He sounded a bit confused but was grinning widely anyway as Jubilee was all but dancing in place and had whipped out her phone.

Kurt teleported over to where Annie and Scott were so that Annie didn't have to get up or bend over to see, and Kate inclined her head their way for a second before she grinned at Noh. "Since when do I do anything the customary way, Noh-Varr?" she teased.

"You have a point."

"Smile!" Jubilee said as she got the newly engaged couple in frame. "Everyone is getting this."

"Oh good, then I'll just be on my phone for the next week," Kate teased lightly. "Retelling the story. Billy will want to hear it _twice_."

"Then save yourself the trouble and tell it while I record, and they can watch it as much as they want," Jubilee suggested.

Kate glanced at Kurt, who just had a huge grin on his face, and shrugged. She turned to face the camera and launched into an explanation of why she'd wanted to go to Paris in the first place as Annie came up on Kurt to give him a much better hug.

"So next winter?" she said with a wide smile. "That's a start, anyway. Do you need any help? I'm sure we can pull together something spectacular."

"You'd have to ask Kate," Kurt said with a wide smile. "I think she already has plans in mind, to hear her talking the entire way home."

"Really?" Annie asked with a delighted smile. "That's _wonderful_!"

"It really is," Kurt agreed. He gave Annie a warm hug before he paused, grinned, and did the same to Scott.

"Congratulations, Kurt," Scott said, still smiling. "You deserve it."

"Thank you," Kurt said, his grin threatening to split his face as Kate finished up her retelling of the proposal.

"And… that's a wrap!" Jubilee declared before she simply threw her arms around Kate. "Oh, it's going to be the _best_ day ever! Just you wait!" she promised a laughing Kate.

Kate wrapped Jubilee up in a hug before Kurt came over to do the same. They heard a few little _bamfs_ around the room and looked up from the hug to find that their little army of imps had apparently gotten impatient with them and had brought the rest of the X-Men _to_ them so they could hear the news.

Storm was grinning as she looked over at Kate. "What's going on here?" she asked, though her tone clearly said that she already knew what was happening.

Kate just beamed as she rushed over to wrap Storm up in a huge. "I took your advice," she said in a grateful whisper as Jubilee was standing on the couch behind them with her phone in one hand and pointing at Kate and Kurt with the other, mouthing the word 'engaged' at the gathered X-Men — which of course, set off a flurry of hugs and congratulations that absolutely buried the little couple.


	17. Happy Birthday, Dad

**Chapter 17: "Happy Birthday, Dad"**

* * *

Annie jumped as K hit the glass of the booth, just to fall down and dive right back into the simulation she was running below. Scott had barely flinched when it happened, and by the time she'd hit the ground, Logan was already shouting out suggestions.

K had been at it for almost an hour, and it was clear even to Annie that she was wearing down quicker now. Nothing had changed in the program outside of Scott occasionally tweaking one setting or another that seemed to cause a more vicious reaction from the snarling blonde mountain of a man below.

"Do you always run these programs until someone… collapses or somethin'?" Annie asked with some concern.

"No," Scott replied distractedly as he watched with a trained eye. "That's just what these two idiots ask for."

Kate patted Annie's knee and tried to redirect her attention to some of the different flower arrangements they'd been looking at. "Don't worry about it," she said. "Really — she's having a blast with her…" She glanced up at Scott with a smirk. "...recently renamed program."

"I told her to quit changing it to that," Scott said as he glanced Kate's way. "She wasn't nice about it. This morning it had been changed to 'don't be a little bitch, Scott'."

"Funny, I thought that was Sabretooth's name," Kate said, the smirk getting wider.

"Apparently it is," Scott said shaking his head. "I think it was a warning."

Kate just chuckled and looked back at Annie, who was still watching the training but trying to look like she wasn't. "I know it looks like she's losing right now, but that's how you learn," Kate tried to explain with a sigh. "You should've seen when Logan started me on hand to hand."

Annie turned toward Kate and let out a bit of a sigh. "Oh, I know," she said. "I tell my students that all the time — learn from losses. But it's one thing to lose in a simulation…."

Kate put her hand on Annie's arm. "Hey. We're not going anywhere. You're not getting rid of us that easy — I still need your opinion on wedding dresses. The dress you picked out for the proposal went over  _swimmingly_."

At that, Annie had to smile and playfully swatted at Kate. "If I'd  _known_ it was for a proposal—"

"You'd have totally spilled it. Sorry, Annie, but you do  _not_ have a poker face," Kate said, shaking her head.

"Still!" Annie crossed her arms and shook her head at Kate for a moment before she let out a little laugh and looked back down at the flower book, turning to the next page full of purple tulips.

Meanwhile, Scott leaned forward, looking on expectantly as K managed to climb up Creed's back. She reached around his neck to try and slice him, but in a flash, he'd grabbed her by the hair and slammed her into the ground. He had rushed over her, one hand holding her down and the other with claws outstretched when the sim died — and she just laid there for a moment, trying to catch her breath.

Scott let out a breath as he shook his head, and Logan went to her side, kneeling and talking to her low about what had gone wrong as she just panted and nodded. Scott waited until it looked like Logan was done talking before he hit the comm. "That's enough for today," he said. "You're going to wear yourself too far down the way you're going."

Logan smiled at her as she pulled a face at Scott's helpful suggestion, but stayed next to her until she was ready to be pulled to her feet. The two of them took a moment as Logan took her into a hug and very obviously was whispering to her before the two of them headed out of the Danger Room.

"You two might want to find somewhere else to be," Scott said, turning at last toward Annie and Kate. "Logan's class is coming in here in a few minutes."

"Oh, is it already that late in the day?" Annie glanced at the nearest clock and then put a placeholder in the book and slammed it shut. "Come on, Kate, let's go upstairs, then. We can munch on some popcorn while we look over the options here."

"I'm always in favor of popcorn," Kate said with a little grin as she offered her shoulder for the very, very pregnant Annie to pull herself to her feet, and the two of them headed for the elevators with little waves in Scott's direction.

The girls were pouring over bouquets again when K finally made her way into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. She leaned against the counter for a moment before she decided the dangers of sitting with wedding planners were less than the dangers of falling over with a full cup of coffee.

She didn't try to be social and avoided interrupting them as she took a seat somewhat nearby and just leaned over her coffee mug with her eyes closed, breathing in the scent of it.

It was another few moments before Annie seemed to notice that K was there, and she grinned up at her. "Do you want to borrow the book when we're done?" she asked politely. "You could always use a few ideas to jumpstart things."

"No thank you, I'm good," K said easily.

"You really should at least start thinkin' about things like this," Annie said, shaking her head. "Maybe set aside some time for wedding planning after you get yourself beaten silly."

K smirked at her a little bit. "What do you think I'm doing in there?" K asked. "That  _is_  my wedding planning for now."

"How is gettin' beat to high heavens any kind of wedding planning?" Annie asked, looking slightly mortified before Kate put a hand on her arm.

"Annie," she said in a low tone. "You know how Sinister's trying to ruin  _your_ husband's life?" When Annie looked at her with wide eyes, Kate tipped her head K's way. "Well, Sabretooth would also like to make sure  _Logan_ stays miserable. This is called preventative planning."

Annie's eyes widened even more as she thought it over, then asked, almost cautiously, "Is it like that with every superhero's wedding? An archnemesis to ruin the day?"

"No," K said. "But ... that little bitch has a habit of killing the women Logan loves. It's his hobby. I'm just trying to make that insanely hard."

"Oh," Annie said quietly. She folded her hands in front of her for a moment and then let out a breath. "Then… I guess that  _would_ count as wedding planning."

"I know you're hoping for something big? But honestly, if we can ever get it together just to get it done — I don't think we  _can_ do anything 'normal'. It will be crashed," K said. "So ... another reason I'm just not looking forward to anything or putting a date on it."

"That's completely unfair," Annie said, now sounding more offended on K's behalf than anything else.

"Fair has nothing to do with it," K told her. "It is what it is. If it wasn't him, it would be someone else trying to be an ass."

"There's a long list of bad guys," Kate agreed, shaking her head.

Annie started to smile just the slightest bit as she looked over the other two women. "And you two are very good at fightin' 'em off," she said with a little smirk.

"Oh, the best," Kate agreed, laughing.

"Need work," K mumbled.

"Well, everyone does," Annie pointed out with an easy smile. "That's how you stay sharp. I mean — I might not be a superhero, but I work on my own job just as hard. I take classes in the summer, that sort of thing…"

"My problem, with him specifically," K said glancing up at her. "Is that I want to make sure it  _hurts_."

"Oh!" Annie blinked at her for a moment. "Oh, well, I guess that's fair," she said after a moment. "He's trying to ruin a wedding. You've got a right to be angry about that, after all."

"That ... is not," K shook her head, knowing full well that Annie was trying to keep the focus on wedding arrangements. "One of many reasons."

Annie chuckled and leaned forward a bit, her eyes sparkling for just a moment as she told K, in all seriousness, "Kate showed me the picture of you and that  _man_." Her smile widened a bit. "I appreciated it."

"I kinda want to skin the blonde and turn him into a throw rug," K told her with a smirk. "But it wouldn't work with what I want to do to him to take him down."

Annie leaned back and tipped her head at K for a moment. "I know Scott said you used to be … an assassin of some kind? But you still surprise me sometimes," she said, shaking her head with a soft, almost disbelieving smile.

"I surprise myself sometimes," K countered with a little smile. "But what I did back then — there really wasn't any room for creativity. It was all get the job done in the time frame and get back or else."

"So where did you grow this imagination of yours?" Annie asked, though she looked almost like she didn't want to know the answer.

"My parents' stories from the old country," K said. "Grew up on stories of the Norse Gods and their … achievements. Stories about the Vikings. That's actually what I have in mind for Creed, but Logan said it's too gruesome."

" _Logan_ said that?" Kate asked, looking up from the tulips.

"It was an execution method the Vikings used. They called it a blood eagle. I won't explain it, but it was … pretty terrible. The thing was — if the person being executed moved or made a noise, they would lose their shot at Valhalla." K smiled softly. "I have never met anyone that I thought deserved that death until this creep."

When Kate winced, Annie just looked disturbed for half a second before she shook her head at K. "I think you are officially banned from tellin' my children bedtime stories," she said.

K just smirked her way. "Oh, I wouldn't do that," K said. "Those old Norse stories are too rough for most adults today. Like how they've warped the Grimm tales from what they once were."

"We'll stick with  _Goodnight Moon_ and stuff like that," Kate suggested.

"I do like ," K said.

Kate let out a giggle at that one. "Ooh, next time I visit Clint when Jess is letting him babysit Gerry? I've  _got_ to record him reading  _Fox in Sox_. He gets so flustered. It's hilarious. Gerry  _dies_ laughing every time."

"I always thought  _One Fish, Two Fish_  was fun at high speeds," K said with a little laugh.

"Leslie Ann had  _The Cat in the Hat_ memorized by the time she was two. They latch onto the funniest things," Annie said.

"They seem to go for them. All of them," K said with a nod. "I had a neighbor years ago that loved  _Green Eggs and Ham_  — her mother fell apart laughing when we made green eggs for the kids."

"We should do that for the little ones down the road," Annie suggested with a warm smile. "I'm sure there will be plenty."

"Well, you've got two in there," Kate said, trying to deflect. "We'll all have our hands full helping out with the mini bosses."

"Yeah, they won't be spoiled at  _all_ ," K teased.

"Oh, honey, if you haven't seen my Scott spend a day alone with his nieces, you don't know how right you are," Annie laughed quietly. "Even if we weren't living here ... two little girls on the way? Trust me; they'll be spoiled."

"He's a pushover," K said. "And a good boy, your Scotty."

"Oh, I know. Why do you think I married him?" Annie replied with a grin.

"What, you mean it's not part of some elaborate scheme to take over the X-Men?" Kate teased. "Annie, you've been lying to me!"

Annie laughed out loud and shook her head. "Oh, no. Y'all can have your team full of danger. I'll just stay here and read  _Anne of Green Gables_ in the meantime."

"You do know that time period sucked, right? Romantic fluffy lace and crap aside," K pointed out.

Annie let out a sigh. "Yes, but it's a good series. And where I got my name, I might add."

"That's likely the best part about that stupid series — the revival of older names."

Kate smirked as she scooted a bit closer to Annie. "Is that what you're gonna do for your twins? You have a favorite book picked out for them?" She tipped her head at Annie's bump. "They're, what… Jo and Beth?"

"Thing One and Thing Two?" K added with a grin.

"Nancy and Georgia?" Kate was grinning too. "Susan and Lucy?"

Annie laughed and shook her head. "I'm not giving you any hints!" she insisted. "It's  _supposed_ to be a surprise." She grinned at the two women for a moment. "But you know,  _you_  could both use some of those names."

"Stop. You are  _not_  funny," K said pointing a finger her way.

Annie just grinned wider at her. "Oh, so you'd rather have boys?"

"I'd rather not. Not any time soon, for sure."

"Yeah, I'll do the wedding thing, but  _that's_  not happening," Kate agreed fervently.

"That's what you said about getting married," Annie pointed out.

"For  _vastly_ different reasons," Kate promised, holding both hands up in front of her to illustrate just how much she disagreed with the turn the conversation had taken. She shook her head, looked up at K, and then let out a sigh. "You know what, I'm tired of tulips. Let's take a stab at some reception venues. Up in my office. Change of scenery might get the blood going to the brain."

"Have fun," K said with a wave. "I had another idea for Tony to play with."

"Have fun with that," Kate said with a smirk. "He was just about drooling all over himself for the last one."

"Clearly, he needs a hobby," K replied.

"Clearly," Kate agreed. She offered her shoulder to Annie to stand and then waved K's way. "We'll be looking through cute little German villages and stuff if you need us."

"I'm thinking more about incendiary and explosive pistol rounds," K replied with a bright smile.

* * *

The days after that leading up to Logan's birthday were subdued, though as the date came nearer, most everyone at the mansion was getting more and more anxious, since Sabretooth had, of course, disappeared off of everyone's radar. As usual.

Noh had promised that the security upgrades he'd done since the last attack were complete and should be more than enough to stop him in his tracks. But even so, it didn't do much to ease either Logan or K's minds and Logan and Scott had conspired with Kurt to be sure that one of them was with K at all times when she was down at the horse barn doing lessons or even just handling chores.

To say she was unamused was an understatement of massive proportions. "What is the point of all the training I've been doing worth if I'm going to have a beefcake escort everywhere I go anyhow?" K asked Kurt the afternoon of the party that he'd arranged. They were in the barn doing chores, and the bamfs were trying to help, but honestly just made a bigger mess of things — spilling grain in the aisles and hosing down the stalls while trying to fill buckets.

"I'm pretty sure I can handle walking to the house alone," she grumped as she cut open a new bale of hay.

"I'm quite sure you can," Kurt assured her, though he was smirking. "But seeing as I'm headed that way myself, I think I'll come with you anyway."

"You wouldn't be headed that way if you hadn't been down here babysitting me to begin with," she pointed out. "Which is a waste of your time too."

"I don't mind," Kurt said. He shrugged lightly and then muttered a few words in German toward the bamfs, who were still trying to help.

K let out a sigh and sat down on a bale of hay in the aisle. "So ... tonight. What are we looking at? How ... friendly do I have to be?"

"As friendly as you like — but I do think you'll get along with the people who are coming, really," he told her honestly. "Logan gets along with them — for the most part," he added with a bit of a teasing grin.

"You, are a troublemaker," she said, pointing a finger at him. "Is this some kind of test or something?"

Kurt put a hand over his heart. "Would I do such a thing to you?" he asked, though the teasing grin was only widening.

"Yes."

"Well, I have it on good authority that your best wedding planning is done in active training," he teased. "If we put them all in the Danger Room, will you be able to put out the table assignments tomorrow?"

"You're really not funny, you know that, right?"

"Ah, but you only tell me that when  _you_ don't like the joke," he said, still grinning.

"Because it's always the same jokes that aren't funny," K said looking up at him half-serious. She stood up and brushed off her jeans. "I guess it's time to head up and 'meet the family'."

Kurt looked almost serious as he shook his head and offered her his arm. "Oh, I assure you. Anyone who considers themselves to be actual family to him didn't make the guest list. Adoptive family? Yes."

"That really isn't reassuring," she said as she took one last look around the barn. "Okay, let's get this thing going, I guess." He offered her his arm, and the two of them walked up to the house, though her hackles were up the whole time — the sensation of being watched was strong, though she didn't see any sign of anyone, and there was no trace on the wind of anything out of place.

When they got up to the house, the resident party planner had, in fact, gotten everything rolling to what K considered ridiculous proportions — but was certainly to the level of normal for Kate. People were already trickling in, and Kurt was kind enough to introduce her to the guests as they showed up, seeing as Logan hadn't returned from a quick run with Scott and Storm.

It was … frustrating. And hard to keep up, since Kurt made sure to introduce her to everyone individually as Logan's fiance, and then wait while they all asked the same. Damn. Questions. She was starting to have a hard time forcing the smile on her face, though Kurt seemed to be thoroughly enjoying it

When a new wave of people came in that Kurt seemed to have been waiting for, K tried to pull back from him, but he gave her such a look. "You need to know these people," he promised. "All of them." She looked tired, and he just smiled. "Come on — I'll let you hide once Logan gets here."

"Oh, right. So I have to go through this crap twice. Not an evil demon my ass," K grumbled as Kurt dragged her over to meet Heather and Mac Hudson.

She tried to force a smile but was completely unprepared when Heather all but threw herself at her for a hug. "Don't worry," Heather said. "There are enough heroes here tonight that we don't have to worry about the 'birthday problem'."

K glanced at the massive grin that Kurt was wearing as she tried to dig deep for cordial. "Thanks," she said through gritted teeth before she managed to shake it off a bit. "But I'm really not worried about that anyhow." To K's surprise, Heather latched on to her and dragged her off to meet 'the old team', with Kurt waving his fingers at her before he headed off to find Kate.

He spotted her across the ballroom, fussing over last-minute arrangements, and couldn't help himself but to teleport directly behind her and wrap his arm around her waist just to kiss her behind the ear. "Your celebration is a success already,  _liebling._ "

"And it'll stay that way," Kate replied, though she turned her head to kiss his cheek and took hold of his arms to wrap him tighter around her. "Just wait til the birthday boy gets here. Regaining the Hug Magnet title for sure."

"Oh, easily," Kurt agreed. He tipped his head toward the knot of Canadian superheroes. "I set Heather on K."

Kate followed his gaze and couldn't help but grin. "Oh. She's never allowed to meet Annie," she said with a little giggle. "That… that would be world-ending."

"It's happening," Kurt said. "It almost has to. You know Annie wants to compare the different teams. Who better to introduce her to than one of the leaders of Canada's finest?"

Kate giggled and leaned back into him. "You're having way too much fun with this," she teased him.

"I really am," he agreed. "K has gotten quieter and quieter — and she's shut down to single syllable, single-word responses when she gets all the wedding questions."

"Little imp," she teased him fondly as she kissed him again.

"It has to come out from time to time," he said. "It may as well be for a good cause."

"And here I thought you were saving it up to mess with me all the time," she teased him right back.

"Would you prefer I kept all my evil tendencies for you?" Kurt asked with a widening grin.

"Kurt, sweetheart, your evil tendencies consist of teasing and being adorable," she said. "We need to talk about your definition of evil."

"I believe if you asked K, she would have an entirely different list of words to describe me tonight."

"I'm not interested in  _her_  list," she shot back, leaning into him.

"This is true," he replied before he kissed her and teleported them across the room. "So what can I do to help?"

You're doing it," she assured him. "Playing perfect host. You're cute when you're performing."

Across the room, Heather had finally worked her way through the team, and though K had done her best to keep up some level of friendliness, it was clear even to non-Hawkeyes that she wasn't anywhere near comfortable around Alpha Flight.

Heather and Mac had gotten caught up with a few of their teammates, laughing and wrapped up in some kind of story when K found her out and turned to get away from them — whatever that took — but she didn't get far. Not when Harry Tabeshaw blocked her path with a warm smile.

He started out grinning, which was enough to get her to give him a second look, but the little "That little group of snow jockeys are somethin' else aren't they?" had her laughing outright. He didn't need to have Kurt or anyone else introduce her — he'd figured it out all on his own, and Harry had more sense than most of them put together, since his next move was to offer her a drink, his arm, and a speedy retreat to a less loud section that lacked Heather's excitement and Mac's slightly too big for himself personality.

"It looks like Harry's decided that flirting is the best method to keep K around," Kurt told Kate with a little smirk. "I'm not surprised."

He grinned at her, and a moment or so later, the noise in the room ticked up a bit as Scott, Storm and Logan finally showed up. Kate watched as the focus of all the old friends shifted to the new arrivals, and she had to shake her head as K used the opportunity to slip away from the party as a whole and try to skirt around the edge of the room toward the door. "We've got a runner," she said quietly to Kurt before she tipped her head K's way.

Kurt stole a kiss before he teleported right into K's path, only to take her arm and start to drag her toward the tight knot of people nearest Logan. Once he made a point to hand her over to Logan, and Logan had taken a good hold on her, Kurt shot her a smile and went back to Kate with a laugh.

"Yep, there's the imp again," Kate said, grinning as she slid her arm around his waist and took a step closer to him.

The rest of the party went on just like that — Kurt made sure to keep K from leaving when she managed to slip away from Logan for a moment, and outside of her trying to pull a runner, there were absolutely no problems. No security breaches. No uninvited guests. It was ... pretty peaceful.

None of them had expected it to go as smoothly as it had, and at the end of the night, it was a bit of a surprise when the first guests started to leave that they found Creed just outside the gates — totally restrained and sedated. No one took credit, but of course, Fury authorized a pick-up immediately.

There were no foreign scents around him and no indication as to who might have done such a thing. At least ... not until the next day, when the mansion got an unexpected and rather impatient guest.

Noh was outside with his headphones on as he was double-checking the outer security that morning to see if there was any sign of who had left the trussed-up Sabretooth for them when Daken arrived at the front gate, and Noh had to simply stare for a moment at his former teammate before he quickly took off the headphones and looked Daken over.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, completely bewildered on seeing one of Norman Osborne's old Dark Avengers.

"I'm here to see my father," Daken replied with a little frown as he looked Noh up and down. "I trust he received my ... gift?"

Noh frowned for a moment and crossed his arms. "You're a day late if you're here to wish him a happy birthday."

"I wasn't invited, so I didn't try to say hello," he said in a bored tone. "I assumed all these ... white hat types would take my appearance the wrong way." His gaze went back to Noh for a moment. "What are you doing  _here,_ anyhow?"

"I've made this place my home," Noh said, his arms still crossed. "And made it my business to keep out unwelcome guests from my home."

Daken let out a little snort of laughter. "Well. I didn't come all this way to be turned back." At that, he moved to simply walk past him.

But Noh moved fast to stand in his path. "You should know I'm one of those white hat types you mentioned before, and I take exception to a villain entering this place," he said with a glare.

Daken let out a sigh and pulled off his sunglasses to fix him with a glare of his own. "I'm not exactly a villain," Daken said with a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. "But if you can't wait to get your hands on me — come on then."

Noh let out a noise like a hiss from the back of his throat before he pounced, his first hit hard and fast enough that even though Daken had been prepared for it, it still sent him back several steps. But Daken all but snarled and jumped right back at Noh, pulling out the claws at about the same time Noh's bracelets morphed to give him his dual guns.

Daken cranked up his manipulations as he tried to push Noh away — grasping him by the forearms as Noh had him more or less pinned already on the lawn with the force of an overly hard hit. He was trying to literally scare the Kree warrior back, but he found himself having to concentrate far harder than he'd anticipated to even make a dent in his emotional armor.

As Noh pressed his advantage, Daken suddenly leaned forward and tried to steal a kiss with a laugh. "You've got me on my back, now what?" Daken chuckled. "Are you ready to show me how flexible you are?"

Noh was visibly shaking, though whether it was fear or disgust was hard to tell for any outside observer. Daken twisted himself so that his grip was a bit tighter inward by the time his pheromone twisting finally started to work a bit, and just to be mean, he popped the claws in his wrist to skewer Noh's arms.

K had been in the horse barn doing chores when the fight broke out, but she didn't really catch what was happening until she heard Noh cry out. She rushed toward the scuffle — when she finally saw it was starting to reverse. The tall, dark-haired man in front of her was pushing the sweet little stardust angel backwards, and she just couldn't allow that to happen, so without taking a moment to think, she hit the call button on the comm at her hip and ran forward.

The stranger looked up just in time to see her before she launched herself at him and hit him like a wrecking ball. Just that quickly, Noh was released from his manipulations and was able to regain control as K started the fight fresh, not even asking who the heck this guy was.

But this new player was a lot more trained than Creed or some of the others she'd been fighting, and he just played dirty. The scuffle went on for a short moment, and the guy did end up pinning her with her hands next to her head as he shook his head and looked her over.

"So you're my father's new plaything? I should have known he'd go for one that would sympathize with … him," he said, glancing up at Noh. She struggled and fought to get loose, but he just chuckled at her.

With half a shout, Noh rushed for him again and simply seized the back of his clothes to pull him off of K and kick him hard in the side. He returned the favor and pounced on Daken to pin him, though not before he'd been sure to leave five sharp fingernails in  _his_ arm for repayment.

"You're not welcome here," Noh hissed out. "Now leave before I detonate those claws in your arm."

A familiar 'bamf' sound echoed the lawn, and Logan and Kurt rushed forward as Daken spotted them. "Would you call off your guard dogs?" Daken called out to the newcomers. "I came to talk! You were supposed to find me before you went for the Silver Samurai. I'm tired of waiting."

Logan had gone to K and helped her to her feet before he and Kurt shared a quick look. "Let him up, Noh. I did say we had business with the Samurai."

Noh paused and looked between Logan and Daken before he did just that, releasing his hold on Daken but never dropping his gaze or his glare.

"Most people make a damn phone call," Logan said toward Daken as he pushed K behind him.

"The Samurai is about to make a play on Madripoor," Daken said. "If you want to take him down, you better do it before then. And I want to help."

"As though you'd do anything but to further your own interests," Noh all but growled low in his throat as he wiped the blood from his arms with a deep glare. " _Help_ is not a term I'd think you familiar with."

Daken sighed. "Yes. I have interests in Madripoor. But he knows that." He glanced between Noh and K for a moment. "Why are you even here?"

"That's not really your concern," Logan replied for him. "When is this supposed to happen?"

"Five days, at most," Daken replied, picking at the remaining blades of grass stuck to his clothes with a look of loathing.

"And we're to trust your word on this?" Kurt asked, his tail switching behind him. "You can't even keep your word not to hurt Logan's friends."

"Have I harmed you?" Daken challenged. "You and the little Hawkeye were the only ones I said I wouldn't hurt." He gave him a twisted little smile as if that was proof of his honesty. "Marvel Boy wasn't on the list. Or … her."

Kurt frowned hard. "You shouldn't need a  _list_ ," he said, but Noh was already shaking his head.

"I don't need your protection to take down this feckless  _child_ ," he said, glaring at Daken. "Regardless of age — the behavior is the same with this one."

"If I go to Japan with you, I'm taking people with me. You can't bother them, or I'm not going to go," Logan said simply. "I know you want to play your little games, but I just don't have the patience."

K just watched Daken carefully, an open expression on her face as she analyzed him more thoroughly than before. "What's the story here?" K asked, looking from Logan to Kurt.

"I'll fill you in later," Logan promised. "The point is that he likes to play games."

"But he won't be going to Japan alone," Kurt added, taking a step closer to his friend. "I'm flying."

"I won't  _play_ with anyone you bring," Daken said with a bored sigh. "Unless they play with me first." He was glaring Noh's way. "No matter how much they regret their missed opportunities."

"Indeed. I could have removed your head when still I was considered a villain," Noh said low.

Daken just smiled at him easily. "You can always try. It could be fun. Boys will be boys and all that."

"Yeah, that's a big 'no way'," K said with a look of disgust as she watched the back and forth between Noh and Daken. "You — are not allowed to play with him."

He only turned halfway toward her. "What makes you think that I would listen to  _you_?" He was laughing at her in a mocking manner as if it was the most ludicrous thing he'd ever heard.

"You want to find out the hard way, you little shit?" K snapped back. "Stop — whatever the hell it is you're doing." She waved her hand his way. "I don't know what it is, but it makes me want to hit you."

His smile fell a bit, and he frowned before he actually did back off on the pheromones in the air. "I want to move on Harada before the weekend," Daken said, turning back toward his father, but not taking his eyes off of K. "That should be more than enough time for you to make your arrangements and get there." He took a business card out of the inner pocket of his now battered suit and stepped toward Logan.

"Please," he said actually looking sincere for a moment. "Call me when you get to Tokyo." He looked K up and down very carefully. "You might want to clear up your affairs before you move forward with this one."

Logan stepped forward and took the card. "I'll call." With that, Daken crossed the lawn nearer to Noh and picked up his sunglasses where they had fallen in the grass, watching him as he cleaned the lenses with a little smirk.

"See you soon," Daken said to Noh as he put his sunglasses back on and started back toward the gate.

"So," Kurt said, long after Daken had stepped outside of the gate. "We're going to Japan then?" Logan nodded and looked toward his best friend.

"Yeah. Oughta pick out a few people to go with," Logan said as he considered things. He looked at Noh. "I don't trust him, but I do have to deal with Harada."

"I'd be more than happy to assist you in correcting his behavior should he try to double-cross you, and I'm sure he will," Noh said.

"I know he will," Logan agreed. "If you can keep from tearing into him before he starts it, you're welcome to come."

"I would certainly like to," Noh admitted. "If nothing else because I don't trust him in the least." He let out a sigh. "I  _suppose_  I could keep from attacking him outright."

"I'm guessing this is the wayward son?" K asked, to which Logan simply nodded. "Yeah, I think you're going to have trouble keeping me from going along."

"If she's going, then I most certainly am," Noh said quickly. "I didn't like in the least the way he spoke to her."

" _Min favorit barn_ ," K said toward Noh with a fond smile. " _Skyddande och vacker_."

…..

Translations from Swedish:

_Min favorit barn - My favorite child._

_Skyddande och vacker - protective and beautiful_

From German:

 _Liebling_ \- darling


	18. Not His Type

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Gang goes to Japan for hijinks and ninja whoopin!

**Not His Type**

* * *

It was early morning when the group from Westchester touched down in Tokyo, and as promised, Logan waited until they were there before he called Daken. The call was short, very little was said and as soon as it was over, he led the little ramshackle group to his preferred hotel to settle in for a few hours.

"We're not making the move until tonight, so rest up and study the drawings of the compound," Logan told them, pulling K with him as they all looked around the room.

As the others settled in, Kate immediately started up the coffee and climbed up to sit on the counter while it was brewing. "And then ninjas," she said simply as she started pulling out cups from the cabinet just over her shoulder. .

"Yeah, plenty of ninjas for everyone," Logan promised as the two ferals disappeared into one of the bedrooms in the suite. "Rest. You're going to need it." He gave Kate a pointed look before he slid the door closed. "I mean it. Get some damn sleep."

" _I'm_ going to look over the maps real quick.  _You_  gonna get enough sleep, gramps?" she shot back cheerfully. "I hear you need naps at your advanced age."

Logan stopped and called out to her, stepping back into the hall for a moment. "Well that was my plan, as long as she doesn't keep me awake." He chuckled and shook his head, shouting over his shoulder before he closed the door. "You don't get to my advanced age without knowing when to take a damn break now and again. Even if it  _is_  forced."

Kate was shaking her head at the closed door before she shot a grin Kurt's way. "So grumpy when they reach that age," she tutted. "Shame."

"He's not wrong," Kurt pointed out, though he was smirking at her.

She sighed and slid off the counter, patting Noh on the shoulder as she passed. "Guess it's naptime then," she said with a little grin. "We should've asked Annie for those little blanket things she gave her kids in Alaska. The ones with pillows already attached."

"Here I thought I was a fuzzy enough pillow for you," Kurt said, sounding disappointed.

Kate laughed and slipped over to kiss him. "Aww, you're my favorite pillow always," she promised him as she took his hand.

* * *

A bit before sunset, after they'd all taken time to rest — and to study the layout of the Yashida compound carefully, the group set out to get dinner before the raid. There were enough traps and pitfalls ahead that Logan had talked the bamfs into sticking to each one of them — Daken included, though the bamf that was supposed to help him didn't look all that pleased about it.

But, there was dinner first, and Logan was sure to take them to his favorite little spot, insisting that Noh join them even if it wasn't strictly necessary. Partway through the meal, Daken joined them, and just to irritate them, he slipped into a space that didn't really exist until he'd pushed his way in between Noh and K.

At first, he kept the conversation on the task at hand, though his eye wandered both to his left and right, and on at least two occasions, K reached under the table to push his hand off of her knee.

But the news he brought sounded encouraging at least. He knew where the Samurai was going to be. He knew what the reinforcements were. And Logan knew that Harada really was trying to make a move on Daken's interests, so the chances of this being a double-cross were slim.

"If the drawings we have are accurate, I think I might have a good spot to watch everyone's backs," Kate offered partway through the planning.

"They are perfect, I assure you," Daken said her way as earnestly as he was able.

"Great. Then I just need a clear path here," she said, indicating one of the higher points. "And the angles should give me decent coverage for — well, almost everybody if things go well."

He reached into his jacket pocket to pull out another piece of paper full of notations, and as he did, he shifted how he was sitting so that when he reached past K to hand the paper to his father, she had to turn her head and lean toward Logan to keep her personal bubble mostly in tact. "These are the newest numbers, counted up not two hours ago," he told him.

Logan glared his way but took the numbers and nodded. "Kate, you'll need at least four quivers if you don't miss any. You bring enough?"

"I brought three," Kate said. "But if someone wants to steal me a sword, I'll make up the difference." She paused and gave him a  _look_. "And I  _won't_ miss any."

"Can you handle a katana?" Daken asked, only partly straightening up.

"I'm better with rapiers, but I've trained with Logan a little," Kate admitted.

"Better than nothing, I suppose," he said with a snide tone. K turned her head toward him at his tone and gave him a sneer, but he just smirked at her and rested his arm behind her so he wouldn't have to lean back out of her space.

"You know," Noh said thoughtfully, his gaze toward Logan. "When I was hardly out of the genetics chamber, I began immediate training on how to become aware of my own body so that I could move about without running into others. Do you have nothing like this on Earth?"

Logan took a deep breath and looked from Noh to Daken. "Not exactly, but the school of thought I abide by usually ends up with broken fingers when you put your hand in the wrong place. Even if they're trying to see what they can get away with when someone's being polite." Daken's eyes drifted from K to his father before he raised an eyebrow and straightened up.

K glanced up at Logan and took his offered arm to lean his way as she looked across the table to Kate and raised an eyebrow just a bit and tipped her head Daken's way.

Kate met her gaze for a moment and nodded the slightest before she said, "I think I'll be able to see everyone fine, so please, keep your gang signs to yourself, and no posing for pictures."

"I'm sure we'll all feel much safer knowing you can spot trouble before it hits us," Kurt said, his arm around her shoulders, though he wasn't quite relaxed either.

"Then I think, if you're all finished, we should get changed and get to work," Daken said diplomatically. "Unless I'm misreading everyone — I believe getting this done and over with is in everyone's best interests."

"Agreed," Noh said with a small smirk. He stood up quickly and looked toward Logan. "I'd like to be home in time for our next dance class. I quite enjoy those, and I have the best dance partner."

K gave him a fond smile. "He's got a point," she said quietly in Logan's ear. "They're doing well, and you owe me a class, mister." He smirked and nodded his head.

"Sounds like a plan," Logan replied before he looked to Daken. "You know where to meet us. Be ready in half an hour." Daken nodded and stood up, only taking a moment to give Noh another good once over.

"I'm sure you're spectacular on your feet too," he said with a smirk before he stepped just around him and headed out. Noh watched him leave as the others got up, and they made their way back to the suite quickly. None of them wasted any time preparing for the mission ahead, as they all wanted to get it over with.

When they arrived at the rendezvous point, Daken was waiting as promised, and Logan checked in with everyone before they broke off into pairs, everyone with a bamf. Kate and Kurt of course were first to their chosen positions, followed shortly by Noh and K, who were quite simply chomping at the bit to get it done.

Logan and Daken slipped through the inner halls of the Yashida compound in search of the Samurai, who they knew was home. Since the honor sword had gone back to the family, Logan believed it was no longer his problem, but old ties with Harada made it so that when he started bringing dishonor on his house, it was still Logan's business to more or less slap some sense into him.

The father and son duo were gone for at least twenty minutes before the first call of alarm was raised and the ninjas seemed to materialize out of nowhere.

"Well, we did put out the right bait," Kurt told Kate with a soft smile as he drew his swords to get to work, and Kate had to chuckle at that as she watched Kurt teleport down to lower ground. For as many ninjas as there were and how badly they wanted to get this done quickly, Kate still couldn't resist taking a moment to watch her favorite swordsman get to work.

"Finally," she muttered to herself as she nocked an arrow onto her bowstring. "Time to shoot some ninjas."

On the other side of the compound, K and Noh were working together easily. As soon as the first ninja had stepped out of their hiding spot in the shadows, they struck in tandem, though K tried to keep it as non-lethal as possible. These were not Hand ninjas — but normal men who likely had families at home.

Just because she was showing them leniency did not mean that they were returning the favor, however. They were going for kill-shots, though clearly they hadn't been prepared for either K or Noh to be healers like the two men inside the compound as well. Which just made the fight that much more brutal once the ninjas caught on that something was up.

There had to be dozens of bodies, crippled or injured around them by the time that a battle cry of sorts echoed from inside. Gunshots. Angry shouts and small explosions that showed familiar silhouettes in the windows above the courtyard had all four of the rest of the team on the outside looking to each other, wondering what had gone wrong.

When it all fell silent inside, that was all that K needed as an excuse before she pushed past the two men in front of her and made a rush for the nearest entrance, with Noh right behind her simply hitting anybody who got too close so she could focus on barreling inside.

She followed the scent trail that Logan and Daken had left behind, though she had to wrinkle her nose when she realized that Daken's simply disappeared at some point. "I don't like that guy," she muttered more to herself than to Noh. It didn't make sense. She'd seen him in the silhouette, so she knew he'd made it as far as Logan had.

They were almost to the center of the compound when K very nearly tripped over the still form of the Samurai — still in full armor and very clearly dead. She looked around the room and slipped against the wall in a dark shadow before she went to her comm to find out if she'd missed them in passing somehow. "Hawkeye ... I'm looking for someone ….short, stabby. Kinda fun."

"He hasn't come out, or I'd have seen him. He should be in there."

"Let me know if he pops up; I'm going to keep looking. Harada is dead ... or … I think it's Harada. What's left of him looks like the pictures." K tipped her head at the dead man's body, still looking for any sign of life in the room outside of herself and Noh.

"That… doesn't sound good. I'll keep both eyes out," Kate promised. "And Noh? If Daken double-crossed us? Go to town."

"You don't need to ask," Noh said, flipping both of the guns in his hands and looking like he was just waiting for the excuse to tear into his former fellow Dark Avenger.

When the two of them reached a point inside the compound that showed a clear fork in the path, K took a moment to scent down both paths and frowned as she looked down both dark hallways. "It ... kinda smells like they went through here, but I can't tell which is the newer path. There's no direction. Can you go one way and I'll take the other? This place is starting to get a little creepy."

"Of course," Noh said. "But call if you run into trouble. It  _is_ creepy."

"Will do, sparkle pants," she agreed. "I'd tell you to do the same, but I know the chances of you  _asking_ for my help are slim." She gave him a little smirk and wished him luck before they each picked a path and went down it.

Noh slid quickly down the stairs on his own path, walking along the walls to test them for hidden chambers as he looked around — until he spotted Logan out in the open… fighting nothing.

It was one of the stranger sights the Kree warrior had ever seen as he watched Wolverine try to take on thin air with every ounce of ferocity he had. Logan's steps were crooked as it was clear there was something very wrong. "Logan!" he shouted to try and get his attention. "What — you're clearly not yourself. How did this happen?" But even as he asked the question, he was already rushing to get hold of Logan to keep him from hurting himself — or the little bamf who was supposed to be following Logan but couldn't get close enough to help with the claws being brandished the way they were.

"Do you think you can get us out of here, my friends?" he asked the bamf assigned to him as well as Logan's once he had a firmer grip on Logan's arms, and the two little guys looked at each other before they nodded and grabbed hold, and in an instant, they were outside, close to Kate's position.

"What the heck?" Kate turned to face them when they arrived, the sudden snarls and growls startling several ninjas on their arrival more than the sound and scents of the teleport. Noh looked up at her with a little frown.

"He's been drugged with something. I'm trying to place the symptoms," Noh said, his frown deep as he thought it over.

"Who hit him?" Kate asked, eyes narrowed.

"I don't know that yet." Noh let out a sigh and then tightened his grip on a still-doped Logan. "But… if memory serves from when we had a few mutants in the Cube? This is likely the drug heat. I'd suggest that your Nightcrawler keep out of the building if I'm right — it's not a good way to go."

Kate nodded and relayed the information to Kurt before she turned her attention back to the two men. "Hasty exit?" she asked.

"K is still inside searching for Daken. Let's wait for her," Noh suggested. "If we don't hear anything, I will go in myself, though I'd have to put Wolverine down to do so," he said as Logan squirmed harder and tried to stab him, though Noh easily avoided it with the state Logan was in.

* * *

Inside, K had wandered through the twisting halls, though the scent had died off long before she finally came up on Daken. He was just ... kneeling in the center of an open room, and she could easily smell the incense that had been burning, but not the man in front of her. "What happened to Logan?" K asked as she cautiously approached him.

Daken turned toward her very slowly and smiled up at her with an almost dopey expression on his face. "They drugged us," he said, even and slow, grinning her way. "We got separated."

She looked around the room as Daken staggered to his feet. "We should get you out of here then," she said. By the time she had turned around, he was within arm's reach. She took a step back from him and frowned deeply. "Can you follow me out?" He nodded slowly, and she watched him for a moment before turning back the way she'd come, only looking behind her from time to time to make sure he stayed close when she couldn't hear him moving.

They got to a hidden corner, and he grabbed her hand. "You actually agreed to marry him?" he asked a hair too loudly, and she rushed back to him to cover his mouth with her free hand.

"Shut up until we get out of here, okay?" she whispered. He smiled and nodded back at her, following more closely as they got to the juncture that she'd split away from Noh. More ninjas filed past, speaking in low, angry tones, and as she was watching them disappear around a corner, Daken leaned over her shoulder from behind.

"You're not even his type," he whispered with a little grin.

She froze in response and turned to look at him closer. "Do you really want to do this right now? While we're trying to get out of this place?" she asked as he pulled at her hand.

"I think that's a great idea," he said before he scooped her up and pushed her against the wall for a kiss. She started to push him away, and he cranked up some of the pheromones, which at least got her to quit fighting him, but she was still frowning.

Daken had gotten handsy fast, and in response, K slid her hand down to his waist and popped her claws below the belt line. He gasped and lost his grip on her, though when he fell, he was sure to take her with him, falling on top of her. It took Noh arriving and pulling him off of her before she could get away from him.

Noh looked absolutely furious as he slammed Daken into the nearest wall. "K, please — tell me again why I promised Scott not to kill anyone."

"I have no idea, sweetness," K replied, trying to gain some distance from Daken and his pheromones. "But I think it was something about X-Men not killing? Or whatever. He is drugged — not that it's any excuse."

Noh glared hard at Daken for a moment, holding him by his shirt above the ground, before he finally looked toward K. "It's called heat — this drug they used. At least, I believe it is; the symptoms these two are presenting are different than those I studied, likely due to their healing abilities."

"I've taken a lot of heat in the past," Daken rasped out. "I have a higher tolerance to it. Though not as much of a tolerance as it used to be."

"Then you should know better than to have done what you did," Noh all but snarled. "You are not helping your case."

"Let Logan deal with him," K suggested as she got out of her crouch across the room.

"Logan is… currently indisposed," Noh said quietly. "We'll need to wait for him to come out of it."

"Let's get out of here and figure it out later," K said. "I just want out of here."

Noh didn't take his gaze off of Daken but nodded the slightest toward his little bamf buddy, and a few moments later — and with the rest of the bamfs helping — the whole group was back outside the restaurant where they'd made their plans. Even Logan, who was being watched over by Kurt, was there.

K made her way over to them and took a seat next to Logan. She took a hold of his arm, promising Kurt she'd keep him from being too stupid, before she looked up at Noh, who was still holding Daken up by his shirt. "Why don't you see if he can tell you who dosed them and killed Harada. You might need to … convince him to tell you."

Noh nodded once and simply started to drag Daken around the corner, no longer interested in the slightest in pretending to be nice for the sake of "not starting anything."

"I'm not so sure I like Japan," K said quietly as she slid to the ground, leaning against a wall.

"It was much more fun when I went last time. Even if Daken was there too," Kate said, tipping her head toward the alley where Noh and Daken had gone. "But if you ask Kitty or Jubes, they'd agree with you."

"Well. Maybe it just needs to be without him," K said tipping her chin toward the alley Noh had disappeared down.

"Might help," Kate said, leaning back with a sigh into Kurt, who was frowning K's way.

"What happened back there?" he asked softly.

K shook her head a little bit and stared down at the ground. "He got fresh."

Kate pursed her lips and frowned, and Kurt was openly glaring in the direction of the alley. "Perhaps I'll help Noh ask Daken a few questions," he muttered as the glare deepened.

"I stabbed him for it," K said quietly. "If that helps you."

"I think Kurt wanted to do the stabbing, actually," Kate said, looking up at her fiance's expression.

"Yeah, well. I'm not gonna stop you."

Kurt frowned a moment longer before he seemed to make up his mind and then disappeared in a poof of smoke, reappearing an instant later in the alley, where Noh once again had Daken lifted off his feet, though Daken didn't seem to be struggling. It looked like Noh had spit in his face, and he seemed even more unfocused than the drugs had him before as he was telling Noh in an almost bored tone about the Hand ambushing their ambush.

When Kurt arrived, Noh looked up at him with a deep glare that only barely checked his fury but inclined his head. "If there is anything you would like to know, now would be the time to ask. The mind control is only effective for a bit longer with his advanced healing, as it's a physical stimulus."

Kurt just nodded his understanding. "I won't take long," he told Noh, his tail switching behind him as he glared at Daken. "I just want to know — Did you intend to betray us or Logan? Did you tell the Hand we were coming?"

"No," Daken replied. "I had no intention of betraying any of you. I didn't know the Hand would be there, or I would have just let them do the job for me."

Kurt frowned hard for a moment. "That can't be everything," he muttered to Noh for a moment. "You had to have an ulterior motive. It wasn't  _just_ Madripoor."

"I am  _trying_ … to know my father, outside of what I've been told."

Kurt glanced at Noh, who nodded for a moment. "It hasn't worn off yet. That's a truthful answer."

"Then… why go after K?" Kurt asked, the frown deepening as he shook his head.

At that, Daken smiled the slightest. "Why not?"

Noh tightened his grip on Daken for a moment. "Because I will blow you into pieces and send you into orbit, that's why not," he hissed low.

" _Your_  physical attributes were not on my mind at the time," Daken replied.

Noh narrowed his eyes, and Kurt could see the fingernails lengthening into claws again. "Nightcrawler, if you could give me the courtesy of some privacy," he said low.

"I would take him further down the alley," Kurt said before he simply turned away and teleported back to the girls and Logan, who was starting to come around. K was more or less hugging her knees and leaning her head on Logan's shoulder as Kate told them how their end of the fight had gone — a lot more successfully, and with ninjas from both sides to fight, so they, at least, had had more fun than the others.

"Did you get what you needed out of him?" K asked as she looked up at Kurt, who nodded and slipped into the seat by Kate.

Noh had been gone for some time before there was the slightest of rumblings, and he finally reappeared out of the alley, trembling slightly and glaring hard before he dropped into a seat and looked K's way. "I decided I preferred my place with the X-Men. It was only a small explosion," he said. "He'll grow most of it back soon enough."

K smirked at him and very quietly said 'thank you.' "So we can leave now, right?"

"I'll fly," Kate offered. "You guys look like you could use a break."

"I can co-pilot," K offered quickly.

"And ditch the hug magnet?" Kate raised an eyebrow at her. "Look at him. He's screaming for hugs. So cute."

"Maybe once Japan is well in the rearview?" K replied with one eye closed. "He's kind of out of it anyhow. He should relax in the plane enough to crash and burn off whatever the hell that was."

Kate thought it over and then nodded. "Fair enough," she said as she got to her feet. "Let's go home. I'm sure there's mistletoe to hang or something way less dramatic than this place."

K nodded and the little group headed out quickly, though Kurt made sure to help K get Logan moving.


	19. Take A Breath

Halfway through the flight back to Westchester, it was clear that Logan was once again back in his right mind, and he made his way up to the cockpit to pull K back.

The two little ferals headed for the very back of the plane and curled up, very quickly deciding that they needed a breather from everyone. Scott wasn't going to be happy about it, and neither was Annie, but it was important. And Logan could see that he had a whole lot of explaining to do ahead of him.

As soon as the plane landed, and the group exited the craft, Logan grabbed a bag he kept in the locker room and rushed off with K in tow. He barely slowed down when Scott called out to ask how the mission went. "It's over, the Samurai's dead. See you later," Logan called back as the two of them stepped into the garage, and moments later, the Harley roared to life with the two of them on their way out.

Scott gaped after the disappearing ferals for a long moment before he spun to face Kate, Kurt, and Noh as they deplaned. "What happened?" he demanded.

"Daken should not be allowed anywhere near K," Noh said calmly as he shook his head at the whole thing.

"He made a pass at K," Kate explained, and Scott went from looking like he wanted to go after Logan and K to looking  _livid_ as he spun her way.

"What?"

"He  _won't_ do it again," Noh said. "Not if he wants to keep anything dear to him." He was already headed upstairs as Scott looked his way, and he shrugged. "He'll regenerate what he's lost, I'm sure. It was only a small explosion."

"What?"

Noh shrugged again. "It's been my experience with him that he doesn't listen to even the most obvious messages — so I wasn't subtle."

"Good," Scott replied finally, though he still looked a little bit lost. "I need you all to debrief."

Kate let out a sigh. "Do we have to?" she said, just to get the  _look_ from Scott before she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Yeah, especially when those two  _ran off_ so fast."

"They needed to recover," Kurt said, shaking his head. "The Hand staged an ambush — there was heat involved."

"Were they going to capture?" Scott asked, falling into step with them as they left the hangar.

"It's hard to be sure. The Samurai died as a result of it, but Logan and Daken didn't," Kurt said with a slowly forming frown.

"There were no restraints that I could see, but then, no one could get close to either of them," Noh put in helpfully.

"Well, give me what you can," Scott said. "And I'll try to corner Logan when he gets back."

* * *

Once the briefing was through, Noh headed upstairs, slightly mollified after he'd had enough time since he'd blown Daken up — just a little bit. But it was hard to stay  _too_ mad when Jubilee had a bag of Twizzlers and was curled up with some of his favorite music and a  _Calvin & Hobbes _book.

"You look wonderful," he said as he climbed in beside her to steal a bite from her Twizzlers.

"You're supposed to say something poignant that would surprise me?" Jubilee replied smoothly before she grinned up at him. "But that's a fair start. Keep going."

"And… you are the best thing I have seen in some time," he said, and when Jubilee raised an eyebrow at him, he just laughed and snuggled her from behind, answering her by very softly singing along to the music playing — " _My baby don't care who knows. My baby just cares for me."_

"Better …. C+," she replied with a little giggle. "How was Japan with the brat?"

"If I never see him again, it will be too soon," Noh replied, a little more harshly than he'd intended.

"That is the general consensus, yes," she agreed before she ran a hand up into his hair and pulled him a little closer for a quick kiss. "But … that's over now. So we can discuss sparkles and Christmas."

"That sounds perfect," he agreed. "What  _are_ you going to get me when I already have everything I need right here?"

"Something you don't expect," she replied. "And … you're moving into 'B' territory." She made a little 'go on' motion with the hand holding the Twizzler.

"We should go to the stars so you can be with the other celestial wonders," he told her as he started up with little kisses.

"That's into the more acceptable range," she agreed. "But then what about all the mistletoe that we need to rig all around the house?"

"Then we'll go on Boxing Day," he said. "And enjoy the hilarity of Terrans listening to the promptings of dead plants once more."

"But the prompting of these dead plants is purely for kisses," she pointed out. "It's like a  _law._ "

"Why you need prompting for kisses is beyond me," Noh said. "I  _always_ want to kiss you."

"Yes, but you're supposed to kiss whoever you catch under the mistletoe with you." She shrugged. "Fun way to mix it up."

"Mm. I still prefer my way," Noh said as he kissed her again.

"Well,  _naturally_ , the best kisses are for your sweetheart," she replied, demonstrating her opinion on the spot. "But think of how much fun it is for those unattached. Or … not yet attached. Something could  _happen._ "

"True," Noh allowed with a little smile. "You're such a romantic, my Jubilee," he teased lightly.

"Takes one to know one," she countered.

He just laughed at that and pulled her down with him, so that he could more properly prove her right.

* * *

Logan had driven until he could finally let out a full breath after the wreck that the Japan trip had been. Then he went a bit further until he couldn't quite feel his hands in the chilled air. They were far enough away from the mansion that there was some actual distance, but not quite far enough to be  _gone_ for the next few days. Though the temptation was there.

It was late enough in the year that they were probably the only ones out on a motorcycle, but he still knew of a few places that they could disappear to that no one from the house would find without Rachel giving them a boost. They ended up in a little grouping of cottages near a frozen over lake, but that really was more to both of their styles. At least to relax.

Even after the fire was going and night was falling, neither of them really had anything to say at first. But it was, mercifully, not something that K was pushing to hear. So when he'd finally gotten comfortable, and the two of them were settled in, he  _finally_ started to fill in all the blanks.

The fiasco that was how Daken came to be, and how he really had no idea the boy was even breathing all this time until, of course, Daken had come out of the woodworks with a weak attempt to kill him.

From there, he was sure to move on to explain how before he'd 'died', he was tied to the Yashida clan, and the full intricacies of how that worked out with both Mariko and Harada. K didn't interrupt him, or press for more, just listening to all of it, which wasn't as reassuring as Logan likely could have used, but she was determined to hear  _his_ take on what was most important.

It was well into the night before he was finished, and he wasn't exactly sure how she was taking any of it, since so far, the only voice that had been echoing the cabin was his.

So when he was finally done, and all was laid out, it was refreshing when her only response was to simply lean forward and kiss him until he relaxed back to his usual state.

* * *

The next morning, Annie woke Scott up earlier than he'd been entirely prepared for, after the late briefing, gripping onto his arm  _hard_ , which had him immediately on alert.

"Annie?" he asked reaching for the lamp, as she just held on that much tighter with wide eyes, and he felt the blood drain from his face. "I'll call Hank," he said quickly, which finally got her to let go of his arm.

Hank was there in an instant, and when he took in the scene, he whispered out a quiet, "Oh, my stars and garters," before he went to work looking over Annie.

Scott was trying not to hover as Hank worked, but Annie just looked so miserable — and it was so  _early_ — that he didn't know what else he could do. He was practically holding his breath the whole time, so when Hank sat back and started to pack his things, Scott couldn't help but burst out with, "What are you doing?"

"This was simply a false start," Hank explained patiently — and Scott saw now that Annie did look a little more relaxed, starting to breathe easier. "We won't be meeting your little ones just yet, it seems."

"Are you sure?" Annie asked in a tired kind of voice. "Because for as close as we are, I'm fine with that."

"You're still a few weeks out, I'm afraid," Hank said in a gentle tone.

"I used to like you," Annie said quietly, though there was no heat to her tone.

Hank just smiled at her and patted her hand. "I'm sure you'll remember that you do when this is through," he teased lightly before he got to his feet. "Until then, please,  _take it easy_. You're carrying twins, and you should stay off your feet as often as possible if you're having false starts this early."

"Honestly," she muttered, smoothing out the blanket over her lap.

Hank just shook his head at her with a little smile before he headed out, leaving a very tired Annie and Scott — who wasn't entirely sure where the bottom had dropped out of his stomach to.

"How are you feeling?" he finally managed to ask when he got around the dry feeling in his mouth. He wasn't sure what that was about — nervousness over the kids or Annie or something else — but it was there all the same.

"Ready for this to be over with," she said frankly before she brushed her hair behind her ears. "What about you? You look ready to fall over."

He sat down next to her and shook his head lightly. "I'm just … sorry you're so miserable," he explained, pushing her hair back for her.

"Well it's not like we didn't know that this is what happens," Annie replied, shaking her head.

"Yeah, well," Scott said, rubbing the back of his neck, "not every time. There's two of them in there, you know," he said in a light attempt at a tease.

She faked a look of shock before she smacked him in the arm. "Mr. Summers, don't you start stating the obvious like your furry little doctor friend. I do  _not_ appreciate it."

Scott grinned wryly at her and then leaned over to kiss her cheek. "Sorry," he offered.

"Do you need a nerve pill?"

Scott was taken by surprise by the question enough that he let out a little laugh. "I'll just feel better when they're here," he said. "You're so miserable…"

"So that's a yes then," she teased.

He shook his head at her and then kissed the top of her head. "I always worry about you," he said in a quieter voice. "That's all I'm saying."

"I know that, you silly man," Annie replied. "We'll get through this just fine. But not if you keep worrying yourself sick."

"I'm not," he said quickly. "I'm just ... trying to keep you safe."

"Don't  _lie_ to me," Annie said.

Scott held up both hands at her tone. "Hey," he said, this time in a more conciliatory tone. "Not every family has a crazy geneticist after them, remember? I'm just trying to look out for you  _and_ the girls."

"And you will do a lot better job of it if you're enjoying what little time is left with just the two of us," she pointed out. "Don't pull that man into my dwindling 'me' time."

He just grinned at her for that one. "Right. Sorry about that," he said and kissed her again.

* * *

"It's official," Kate declared as she sat down next to Kurt, flopping back on the couch pillows with her phone and a pad of paper in hand. "It's all set up. Time zones are horrible for phone calls across the world, but it is  _official_. We are getting  _married_."

Kurt grinned at her as he reached over her to fiddle with the ring on her hand. "Yes, we are. That hasn't changed," he teased her lightly.

She rolled her eyes and then stole a kiss before she explained, "I mean, we've got the cathedral booked. Officially. December 7. Save the date — all that."

Kurt grinned widely and then stole a much longer kiss for that one, and for a while, the two of them just curled into each other, grinning and excited about the whole thing.

So the house was quiet save for the crackling fire in the living room when Logan and K came in, both of them sporting scraped up leathers, though neither of them looked much worse than a bit windblown.

They made it almost halfway through the room before Kate stirred from where she was snuggled up asleep with Kurt — though Kurt was the one to ask over her shoulder, "What happened to you?"

Logan let out a little sigh and shook his head. "Go back to sleep." But K was smirking at both of them in spite of Logan trying to deflect.

"Really," Kurt said, sitting up a bit as Kate woke up a little more and started to grin at the state of them.

"Lose a fight with a bush?" she teased.

"Hit a patch of ice," he grumbled.

"You?" Kurt said, both eyebrows shooting straight up. "Never."

"It wasn't the ice as much as it was the cold hands," K said with a grin. "Oops."

Kurt was already started to laugh as he realized what happened, though Kate had to know — "Up his shirt or down lower?"

"Yes," K replied, grinning wider.

Which, of course, just had Kate laughing as Kurt positively  _cracked up_ at the mental image, one hand on Kate's shoulders for support as every time he looked back up at K and Logan he started laughing again.

"I'll be in the garage in the morning," Logan said over his shoulder, pulling K along with him and leaving both Kate and Kurt still laughing in the living room.


End file.
